Futile Devices Scans

The memories that had once become blurry suddenly turned clear again. It had been so long ago that Ke Bu had almost forgotten. That was why Zhi Li had smiled that night during military training when Ke Bu said those words to Su You Yan. He had remembered the very first time the two of them met.

Before Ke Bu could sink into his memories, Zhou Xin He looked at him worriedly.

“Ke Bu, are you okay? Even if you really do have feelings for Zhi Li, you can’t keep living inside your own imagination. That’s not good for your health.”

“I’m telling the truth!! If you don’t believe me, ask him.”

The fact that nobody believed him was a huge blow. Everyone turned to look at Zhi Li. Ke Bu suddenly felt nervous deep down inside. If Zhi Li denied it at this moment—if he said it had only been a joke back then, that he did not remember it, that he had never taken it seriously—then Ke Bu truly would not know how to settle his own heart.

“Quick, Zhi Li, crush him completely!”

Zhi Li shrugged noncommittally.

“I’m afraid I can’t. This time, what he said is true.”

One person’s heart relaxed while everyone else’s hearts tightened.

They had thought Ke Bu was joking. Who could have expected Zhi Li to actually confirm it?

For some reason, Ke Bu’s poor little heart was filled with an odd sense of satisfaction, vanity, and accomplishment.

Questions came crashing toward Ke Bu like overwhelming floodwaters. Ke Bu slowly gave a simple explanation. In the end, Chu Hao Yu laughed and said:

“So that’s all? It was just a joke after all. You two don’t even count as dating. You scared me for nothing.”

“I already said it wasn’t what you all imagined. It’s just a title.”

As for why he had only spoken about it now, Ke Bu felt that it was finally time to say it aloud. After all, they had both grown up. Sooner or later, Zhi Li would be taken away by someone else.

Students gradually began entering the classroom, and the bell rang for class. Ying Xiu Jie tossed away his milk carton.

“I’m going to need an entire month to digest this.”

Everyone else scattered as well. Zhi Li stood up and walked behind Ke Bu.

“Shouldn’t you thank me?”

“What?!”

Zhi Li lightly tapped the spot over Ke Bu’s heart with his fingertip.

“For satisfying your little vanity and sense of accomplishment.”

Ke Bu hurriedly covered his chest in panic.

Not only had Zhi Li noticed his feelings, he had summarized all of them perfectly in a single sentence!

A blush spread uncontrollably across his cheeks.

“I-I don’t understand the language of demons at all!”

After saying that, he rushed back to his seat.

After afternoon classes ended, Ke Bu returned to the dormitory. Chu Hao Yu was not there. Instead, Gong Zhu was waiting for him with an awful expression on his face.

The moment Ke Bu saw Gong Zhu’s expression, he could already guess what he wanted to say. Ke Bu tossed his books onto the bed.

“I already told you. Zhi Li and I aren’t really dating.”

“But don’t you think it’s strange?”

Gong Zhu still seemed unable to recover from the shock earlier that morning. Everything that had happened had deeply shaken him. He had originally thought only Ke Bu had feelings of that kind toward Zhi Li, yet he never expected Zhi Li himself to acknowledge their relationship. He could not accept it.

“What’s strange about it?”

“There are too many strange things. Ke Bu… do you like Zhi Li?”

Gong Zhu stared at the floor as he slowly asked the question. Ke Bu paused, his throat tightening painfully.

“How could I possibly like him? I already said—”

“Liar!”

Gong Zhu interrupted him.

“Maybe it really was just an impulsive joke at the beginning. But after calming down, you could have explained it clearly. So why did you insist on maintaining this joke for so many years? Why could you tolerate carrying the title of dating Zhi Li if you didn’t like him? If you were afraid of loneliness, why not simply stay together as friends instead? Isn’t that strange? This so-called fake relationship of yours has so many strange things about it. Haven’t you noticed? It’s all lies. Built from lies. Stacked together with lies.”

The more Gong Zhu spoke, the more agitated he became. His small face flushed red.

Words were weapons.

And every sentence stabbed painfully into Ke Bu.

Ke Bu sat on the edge of the bed without replying.

So even Gong Zhu had seen through it.

This agreement full of loopholes.

“Since you don’t like Zhi Li, then can you let him spend one day with me for my birthday in a few days? Just one day is enough. Maybe you’ll laugh if I say this, but every birthday I’ve had was surrounded by fake friends. Back in high school, I dated an upperclassman, and when people found out, they spread disgusting rumors everywhere about how revolting I was. But I think Lord Zhi Li knows I like him. Yet he never looked at me strangely. He stayed exactly the same as always. Neither distancing himself nor getting closer. This year, I only have one wish. I want to spend time with him. Even if he’ll never fall in love with me.”

“Alright then. Fine. You can spend time together. The two of you can happily enjoy your little world alone.”

Ke Bu stared at Gong Zhu, who froze for a moment.

Ke Bu continued:

“Did you think I’d say something like that? I told you from the very first day we met that I’m not a kind person. Who doesn’t have a painful past? Do you think using your own misery to pressure someone into love is noble? No. Zhi Li is not allowed.”

“You think you’re in any position to criticize me?”

Ke Bu frowned tightly. Something was wrong. But where? Back then, he had not wanted love at all. He had only wanted someone to talk to, only wanted someone by his side. He had never used his own misery to coerce anything from anyone. After that, he never revealed those feelings again, never asked anything of Zhi Li again. Zhi Li clearly could have left whenever he wanted.

“Actually, I never needed to ask you. I only need to ask Zhi Li.” Gong Zhu walked toward the dormitory door. After opening it, he turned back around. “Are you afraid, Ke Bu? There’s another possible reason why Zhi Li never withdrew from the agreement. The reason you fear most. Maybe he only continued this arrangement out of pity for you. Have you ever thought about that possibility? Maybe it’s not that he doesn’t want to leave. Maybe he’s only waiting for you to bring it up first, so he won’t hurt you.” The door closed.

Ke Bu collapsed onto the bed and laughed, clutching his stomach as he laughed. When exactly had he fallen in love with Zhi Li? Last year? The year before? Or even earlier? Gradually, the laughter faded away. He kept criticizing others, yet without even realizing it himself, had he also been emotionally coercing Zhi Li? He truly wished everything was fake. He truly wished he had never begged Zhi Li not to leave. At least then, he could confidently say that Zhi Li stayed because he wanted to, not because of anyone else. He could not refute Gong Zhu’s words. Could it really be exactly as Zhi Li had once said—that the one who understood nothing was him?

Ke Bu drifted into a hazy sleep and dreamed of the past. It was the day they graduated from high school. White clouds floated across the blue sky while students laughing and shoving each other gathered around campus in groups. Some were happy, some regretful. Ke Bu stood bored at the school gate waiting for his father to pick him up. Zhi Li was like a moving landscape, beautiful and vivid. His neat clothes were wrinkled.

“What happened to your clothes?” Ke Bu asked while playing on his phone as Zhi Li walked over.

“When I went downstairs, the girls rushing toward me ripped all the buttons off.”

“So being popular really is different. My second button is still firmly attached. I seriously don’t get it. We’re both guys, but the treatment gap is way too huge.”

Zhi Li took off his jacket and tossed it onto Ke Bu’s head. “I can’t give you the button, so just take the jacket instead.”

Ke Bu pulled the jacket down and said viciously, “You’re making another awful joke again. Your personality seriously needs fixing.”

“As an exchange condition.” Zhi Li reached out and pulled off the second button from Ke Bu’s uniform.

Watching Zhi Li turn to leave, Ke Bu gritted his teeth angrily. “Zhi Li, I’ve only worn this uniform twice!! Don’t think I’ll forgive you unless you compensate me.”

Zhi Li played with the button between his long fingers and turned his head slightly. “Oh right. I’m going to Sheng Jie Academy. Are you coming?”

“If you tell me to go, then I’ll just go?”

“If I tell you to go, you will go.”

That bastard. He always went along with whatever Ke Bu said. If he argued back even a little, it would at least be easier to respond to him. So infuriating.

As Ke Bu watched Zhi Li’s figure grow farther and farther away, he suddenly woke from the dream. To dream about the past at a time like this… he really was laughable. He lowered his head and stared at the tangled lines in his palm. Back then, he had clearly promised he would let Zhi Li leave. Yet the one refusing to loosen his grip was his own tightly clutching hand. This damned hand. This damned hand that obeyed his heart.

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