Night fell. It should have been a day of celebration now that the realm was newly settled and soldiers and civilians rejoiced together, yet outside the Prince of Jin’s residence two plain white paper lanterns swayed in the wind. The snowstorm had not cleared. It had fallen thickly all day, and even after nightfall the cold remained.
The pitch-dark princely residence held none of its usual lamplight, only a faint, deathly pallor shining through.
A man in ordinary cloth garments knocked at the gate, his dark clothing blending into the long night. The guards had just opened the door and were about to bark at him when Wang Fu, sent by the Prince of Jin to check, suddenly asked, “Are you the man sent from the palace?”
The man drew his dark clothing closer and nodded in reply. Wang Fu hurriedly welcomed him inside, and someone behind them shut the great gate, keeping the wind and snow outside.
Only then could it be seen that everyone in the Prince of Jin’s residence was dressed in mourning white, with white lanterns reflected against the snow.
Wang Fu extended a hand to guide the visitor toward the study. “His Highness has been waiting for some time.”
The man quickened his pace to follow. “Chief Steward Wang could not conveniently leave the palace, so he allowed this servant to come instead.”
Near the study door, Wang Fu glanced inside. “Remember to speak carefully. This is the Prince of Jin. None of us can afford to be implicated in this matter, so take care not to anger him…”
“Your Highness.”
Zhao Guangyi heard Wang Fu lead the man in but did not raise his head for a long while. He slowly trimmed the wick of the spirit lamp on the desk until at last a flame rose, then looked at the newcomer. “Wang Ji’en sent you?”
“Yes.”
“Then I suppose you know about this matter as well…”
“This servant only knows that my elder brother and sister-in-law live in the eastern part of the city. That night, the Chief Steward happened to entrust someone to their care.”
“How is Ling’er?” Zhao Guangyi slowly picked up a handkerchief and wiped his hands clean. “Has she been hidden at your home all these days?”
“Yes, nothing has changed. It is only that Ling’er… I fear she is not well. She may merely be lingering on for a few more days.” Zhao Guangyi’s eyes turned cold at once. “Not well? She is the only witness now. Take this Prince to her immediately.”
Zhao Guangyi changed into dark blue-green robes and entered an ordinary alley among the common people. At its end stood a thatched hut, probably used to store firewood in winter. Beside it, light shone through one tiny straw-covered window. It too was only a crude room.
His footsteps creaked over the accumulated snow. At once there was a faint sound inside the hut, and someone extinguished the lamp.
The man accompanying him looked helpless. “Your Highness, ever since that night, Ling’er has been this cautious. Any sound frightens her badly. I fear this time she has again…”
Zhao Guangyi looked at the sleet and snow outside and at the thatched hut, which could hardly keep out the cold. It seemed Wang Ji’en had paid little attention after entrusting her here. Pity stirred in him, and his voice softened. “Wait outside. I will go in and see her.”
The door stood loosely ajar. The moment he pushed, the wind surged in and flung it wide, sweeping snowflakes into the pitch-dark room. Zhao Guangyi suddenly smelled the metallic reek in the air and knew something was wrong. “Ling’er?”
There came the sound of frantic movement. Zhao Guangyi stepped forward and lit a lamp. One brief sweep of the light made his whole body stiffen. “Ling’er…”
Her pale lotus-root-colored palace dress had dragged along the ground for days and was filthy beyond recognition. Before him, a person lay on the floor with tangled hair streaked in blood. Dark bloodstains, long since dried, marked the floor on every side. She lay with her back turned to him. The lamp oil she had spilled in fright was still on the table. Fortunately Zhao Guangyi had taken up the lamp itself, or one careless moment might have set the room ablaze.
Zhao Guangyi watched her nearly crawl across the floor. The cramped room was thick with the smell of blood, enough to make a person retch. He stood frozen for a long while, fear rising in his heart. “Ling’er… Ling’er, turn around and look… I am…”
Terrified, he wanted to explain that he had not come to hurt her, but the words reached his lips and stopped. Who was he?
Ling’er abruptly turned her head. Zhao Guangyi looked instinctively and actually stumbled back two steps. The girl who had once been sharp-tongued and quick-witted now looked like some blood-soaked demon. Everything below the bridge of her nose had rotted into exposed flesh. Zhao Guangyi turned his face away, unable to bear another look.
A muffled sound escaped her.
Zhao Guangyi almost lost his grip on the lamp. “Ling’er…” He slowly crouched down.
“You…” He almost thought Wang Ji’en had been wrong to spare her. It might have been kinder to let the Chancellor kill Ling’er to silence her. Looking as she did now, she had almost… lost all human form.
Her eyes were bloodshot. Ling’er suddenly lunged forward, clutched the hem of his robe, and shook her head desperately.
“Who did this to you? Who harmed Yunjie?” Zhao Guangyi bent down. “Tell me… Ling’er…”
Her hands shook too violently to move properly. After struggling for a long while, she traced a dark flower shape on the floor. Zhao Guangyi studied it closely. “A flower? Lady Huarui?”
She nodded.
The man outside listened in secret.
Zhao Guangyi seized her arm and stared hard at her. “What gave her the courage to do something like this? She entered the palace and immediately gained favor? Imperial Brother visited her?”
The force of his grip hurt Ling’er so badly she could only keep nodding, her eyes looking almost ready to bleed.
Zhao Guangyi repeated the things he had heard one by one. “Imperial Brother wanted to visit Yunjie, but in the end he went to Lady Huarui instead, did he not?”
Ling’er had strength only to nod. Zhao Guangyi finally realized that she could no longer speak. The wounds around her mouth had festered without treatment, and the winter cold had frozen the blood, making the sight even more horrifying.
He released her arm in defeat. Ling’er collapsed to the floor and only stared at him, even more desperate to say something. Zhao Guangyi slowly sat in the chair. “Huarui? She is only a woman. No matter how capable she is, she must have someone to rely upon… If he had not abandoned her again and again… if he had not simply left Yunjie there… Zichen Palace was really no different from a cold palace, was it…”
Ling’er struggled even harder to rise. Zhao Guangyi burst into laughter. “This is what became of all of you… I should have made them come and see! This is what happened to the Wang family because of him!” He stood and looked at Ling’er. “Do not worry… the Empress will not have died for nothing. That woman will pay the price… and so will he…” Ling’er could no longer shed tears, but hearing him say this, she gradually calmed. Zhao Guangyi looked at her and could no longer see anything of the lively, clever girl in his memory. He put down the lamp and glanced at the crude bed nearby. Most likely she could barely move, had been startled by the sound of someone arriving, and had rolled from the bed. Zhao Guangyi finally wanted to call people in and have her moved somewhere warmer, but then he saw the fierce intent in Ling’er’s eyes as she stared at the stone-built bed. “Ling’er!”
Elio’s Notes: The raw prints 赵匡胤 in the sentence where the active character is plainly Zhao Guangyi. FD follows the scene’s continuous subject and renders Zhao Guangyi here, while preserving the source irregularity in the project record.
He had no time to say anything more. Without hesitation, the girl smashed her head straight against it. In an instant the sight became even more unbearable, blood bursting across her face.
“You…” He reached out faintly. In the end, the girl had still chosen to follow Yunjie.
You cannot keep a single one of them.
Everything he had ever wanted to hold on to in this life had slipped beyond his reach.
Even Ling’er, mutilated to this extent, whom he had just pitied and wanted desperately to keep alive, would not give Zhao Guangyi the chance.
The thatched hut was bitterly cold, and wind and snow blew in through the cracks.
The blood quickly froze. Seated amid the wreckage of schemes and plots, he slowly closed his eyes.
The scent of temple incense had long since drifted far from his life, yet all he could still do was begin chanting sutras to guide the dead onward.
To send every one of you away.
This was the one ability that belonged to him alone.
The door creaked open. Zhao Guangyi emerged carrying Ling’er’s terribly mangled body. Wang Fu, seeing from the mouth of the alley that something was wrong, hurried over. The moment he saw the scene, he froze in place.
“The Empress has died. This is the maid who accompanied her all the way here, and now she too has ended like this…” His voice was low. He could not bear to say more.
Wang Fu could hardly believe it. “The Empress… has died?”
“Wang Yunjie was murdered inside the palace.” Zhao Guangyi pronounced each word separately. “Every one of you must remember three words: Zhao Kuangyin!” Wang Fu and the man who had led him here both dropped to their knees. Tonight Bianjing was celebrating with palace banquets and joy on every side. Only Zhao Guangyi stood in the snow holding this nearly shattered corpse.
He could not endure such cold either.
Only now did Zhao Guangyi remember that he too could not bear it. In the end, he too was not… someone who belonged beneath this sky.
His hands trembled faintly and the wound in his abdomen hurt fiercely. “Zhao Kuangyin… Big Brother…” Suddenly he laughed. “If you had only been willing to turn around and look at her, even once, she would never have become what she is today…”
Wang Fu gritted his teeth. “The Military Governor’s only bloodline…” He could not finish.
Holding the girl as she slowly grew colder, Zhao Guangyi stood with his face lifted for a long time.
So this is snow… Yunjie… I never told you that I had never seen snow before… and you never went south. I always wanted to return to Jiangnan with you and look around… Did you know… Jiangnan is my homeland…
Do not old people always say that once a man has accomplished something and taken a wife, he should bring her back to visit his homeland?
Snowflakes gradually covered Ling’er’s face. He remained standing rigidly in the snow. “Your Highness…” Wang Fu called softly, but Zhao Guangyi did not move.
Snow covered him from head to foot, the cold sinking all the way through. Far away he could still hear faint echoes of celebration drifting among the roads and fields. The Prince of Jin held immense power and enjoyed the Emperor’s deep trust, yet at this moment he stood at the very end of it all with a cold corpse in his arms, unable to say a word.
He had destroyed his homeland, lost Yunjie, and even… he himself was not truly himself.
“Your Highness is wounded. You should go back… Your Highness?”
Zhao Guangyi finally closed his eyes. “I did not want to die in that flood, and I did not want to kneel before the Buddha until I became cold ash, accomplishing nothing… Was that wrong?”
No one could answer. He abruptly opened his eyes and raised his voice. “Wang Fu!”
“This subordinate is here.”
“Take Ling’er’s body back and show it openly to the Wang family’s former retainers! Zhao Kuangyin neglected the Empress, demons ran rampant through the rear palace, the Empress was killed, and Ling’er was mutilated! If we do not avenge this, we will have betrayed the Military Governor’s great kindness to us!”
“Yes!”
“Remember… cremate Ling’er’s body… Once you return to the palace, give the ashes to Wang Ji’en. On the day of the Empress’s funeral… find an opportunity to bury them together.”
A shadow flashed at the far end of the alley.
He slowly walked back, one step at a time.
By the time he reached the Prince of Jin’s residence, he looked almost like a snowman. He could not speak of it, so no one ever knew that he too could not bear such cold. Zhao Guangyi remembered how, during the surrender ceremony, Zhao Kuangyin had ultimately been unable to restrain himself and descended from Xuande Gate merely to place a robe over Li Yu. He could not bear to watch that pale figure suffer from the cold.
The Prince of Jin had seen it all and endured silently at one side. He could not bear it either.
Nothing in his life had ever been rightful from the beginning. It was as though he were destined forever to walk alone through darkness until he forgot the direction.
So I want everything you have.
He returned silently to the Prince of Jin’s residence.
“Those who harbor love and desire cannot see the Way. It is like clear water stirred by a hand; when people gather around it, none can see their reflection. Love and desire cross and tangle within a person, clouding the heart, and therefore the Way cannot be seen. You monks must cast aside love and desire. When the defilements of love and desire are exhausted, the Way may be seen.”
Elio’s Notes: This passage is from the Sutra in Forty-Two Sections. It compares a mind clouded by attachment and desire to clear water stirred until no reflection can be seen; the text then urges renouncing those desires so that the Way becomes visible.
The plain white paper lanterns burned through the night amid the flying snow. From afar, whose wandering soul were they calling home?
When morning came, the snow still had not stopped.
The courses of the waterways inside the Hall of Honoring the Worthy matched their originals down to the smallest detail. Following the stream toward the bedchamber, Liuzhu saw people from the palace arriving.
“His Majesty summons the Marquis of Disobedience to enter the palace immediately.” The herald deliberately drew out his voice, as though afraid anyone in the residence might fail to hear.
After performing the proper salute, Liuzhu hurried into the bedchamber. “Ruler…”
Li Yu rose and drew his shoulders in slightly. Liuzhu at once wrapped the sable fur around him. “Someone from the palace has come to order Ruler into the palace…” She assumed he would certainly refuse and was already worrying about how they could smooth the matter over.
Li Yu instead went to one side to change his clothes. “I know.”
“Ruler is going into the palace?”
“Yes.”
That afternoon, Wang Ji’en clearly saw Zhao Pu request a secret audience, saying there was an extremely important matter to report. Words like those rarely meant anything good. Wang Ji’en tried several times to investigate and failed, and was secretly vexed. Yet after the Chancellor left, he saw that His Majesty was in excellent spirits and had not been angered by whatever secret matter had been discussed. Wang Ji’en immediately brightened as well and attended carefully to everything before and after. After court, Zhao Kuangyin glanced at the sky. “Has the Marquis of Disobedience received the decree?”
“Yes. His carriage has already entered the palace.”
“Invite the Marquis of Disobedience to the Sandalwood Pavilion.”
When Li Yu entered the Sandalwood Pavilion, he sensed people standing in attendance all around. He no longer placed any hope in his eyes. By now, whether he could see or not truly no longer mattered to him.
When the Emperor arrived, Li Yu rose to welcome him. Zhao Kuangyin merely ordered the imperial physician forward to examine his eye ailment. The physician was visibly surprised. “The Marquis of Disobedience was born with the extraordinary sign of double pupils in one eye. Such a thing has been spoken of as a marvel through the ages and is rare even in medical texts…”
Li Yu frowned faintly. “Having double pupils in one eye is not necessarily a good thing.”
“Indeed. It seems my lord’s eyes followed unusual channels from birth, and now some trigger has brought on this condition…” The imperial physician felt his pulse for a long while, then suddenly lifted a candleholder from the table. “Is everything before my lord completely black?” He moved the object slightly. Li Yu’s pupils were nearly amber. “I can faintly sense something moving. It is extremely dark, but when I have rested well, in dim places I can sometimes make out vague outlines.”
Zhao Kuangyin closed the door and sat to one side. “The Marquis of Disobedience’s eyes were not this pale before. They seem almost to have dispersed.”
The imperial physician examined him and considered for a long while. “People with double pupils are exceedingly rare. This subject has never encountered an illness like this. Still, if the Marquis of Disobedience can perceive the outlines of objects, then the vessels have not been completely damaged. There may yet be room for recovery.”
The figure in imperial yellow immediately raised his sword-like brows. “If it were not rare, why would I need you to treat him? What exactly do you mean?”
The imperial physician bowed. “Your Majesty, please calm your anger. This subject can only do his utmost. At present I do not know what triggered the Marquis of Disobedience’s condition, so any medicine can only be tried cautiously. I ask Your Majesty to understand. This illness is…”
“What use are these empty words? I am asking only one thing. Can he recover or not?”
“This subject does not dare make a reckless claim. We can only attempt treatment…”
Zhao Kuangyin was about to speak again when the man seated beside the couch said calmly, “I trouble the imperial physician to take such care. I had already stopped hoping for recovery. If I can improve, then so be it. If I cannot, I ask Your Majesty not to blame anyone else. This is Li Yu’s matter alone. There is no need to disturb everyone over it.”
Zhao Kuangyin was exasperated. Li Yu made it sound so simple, and with the imperial physician present he could not erupt. He had no choice but to order sharply, “Go prescribe medicine immediately. If there is the slightest mishap…”
“This subject would not dare.” The imperial physician hurriedly withdrew, afraid that one more sentence might immediately provoke imperial wrath.
The Sandalwood Pavilion ordinarily had no resident. It had been specially prepared now so that Li Yu’s eyes could be treated there. For a time the two men were silent. Zhao Kuangyin spoke first. “It could not have happened for no reason. There must have been some cause. What exactly happened to your eyes…?” He sat down beside him. Wrapped in warm fox fur, Li Yu’s complexion looked much better than it had in the past few days.
Li Yu only shook his head. “I do not remember…”
“No. You are always like this. If you want them treated, you have to think carefully. What caused it?”
“I do not want them treated.” There was no particular emotion in his voice. He merely answered. Zhao Kuangyin could not even pretend it was spoken in anger. Li Yu had said it entirely calmly.
“You!” Anger rose in him at once.
“I told you, this is my matter alone. Whether they recover or not no longer matters. Besides, I do not want them to recover at all.” Li Yu showed no concern. His hand found the carved wooden railing beside the couch, and he leaned slightly against it. “There really is no need to do this.”
Zhao Kuangyin watched him recline languidly against the sandalwood. Nearly everything inside the Sandalwood Pavilion was made from the same wood. His voice softened. “Red sandalwood… you should like it.”
Li Yu closed his eyes and breathed in faintly. “Liking something… does not necessarily mean anything…”
“What do you mean…?”
“We cannot go back. I cannot see, and you destroyed Jiangnan. Zhao Kuangyin, stop deceiving yourself…” His tone was so faint it seemed he might fall asleep in the next moment, yet his fingertips could clearly be seen trembling.
Whether it was the cold or his own heart being shaken, Li Yu did not know.
The warmth slowly rising from the brazier put him at ease. After a long silence, Zhao Kuangyin spoke first. “Are you terribly cold?”
Li Yu shook his head.
“Then shall we go outside for a walk?”
He did not answer.
“I wanted to watch the snow fall with you, but I am afraid there will not be time.” The long sigh made Li Yu turn his face slightly. “Not enough time? Are you afraid I will die…?”
“No… Shall we go outside?” Zhao Kuangyin did not explain further. He suddenly took Li Yu’s hand. Li Yu lifted his wrist to avoid him, but Zhao Kuangyin simply drew him close and wrapped the fox fur securely around him. “No one will see.”
His fingertips were faintly cool. Li Yu stopped resisting.
Zhao Kuangyin took his hand and slowly led him outside.