Shao Wu rushed out onto the balcony and called Yang Shuyi’s home. In the few seconds he waited for someone to pick up, his throat trembled with nerves and every terrible possibility flew through his mind. What could have happened to Longlong? Was she sick? But what kind of illness could a child like her have that would keep Yang Shuyi away from school for days? Could it be something serious, some strange disease? After Yang Long and Xiaojuan had died in the Wenchuan earthquake, Shao Wu could not stop himself from imagining the worst.
“Hello?” Yang Shuyi’s voice came through, giving nothing away.
“It’s me, Shao Wu. What happened to Longlong?!”
“…”
“Yang Shuyi?” Shao Wu’s voice trembled.
“She was bullied by classmates at school,” Yang Shuyi said calmly. “She’s physically fine. It’s just… forget it. Are you free tomorrow?”
“I am!”
“Could you come over to my place and talk to her?… When we try to talk to her, she ignores us.”
“Okay. Sure. What time?”
“Any time is fine.” Yang Shuyi paused for two seconds, then said softly, “Thanks, Shao Wu.”
Shao Wu swallowed, his voice still shaking. “You don’t have to thank me… As long as she’s okay.”
Yang Shuyi sighed softly, as though he wanted to say something, but in the end he only said, “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”
At noon the next day, as soon as class ended, Shao Wu took the box of Daoxiangcun pastries and headed straight for Yang Shuyi’s home.
Yang Shuyi opened the door. Grandma sat in the corner of the sofa watching television. When Shao Wu came in, she stood and smiled. “Xiao Shao, you’re here. We’re troubling you again. Our family really…”
Shao Wu hurriedly shook his head. “Please don’t say that. I came to see Longlong.”
Grandma pointed toward the closed bedroom door and whispered, “She’s inside doing homework.” Then she sat back down in the corner of the sofa, covered her knees with both hands, and rubbed them. Shao Wu looked at her and lost himself for a moment. In his memory, Grandma was still the woman she had been during last year’s New Year, apron tied around her waist as she chopped vegetables and cooked briskly at the stove. But now she had grown so old. Curled into the corner of the sofa, she seemed powerless in the face of everything that had happened.
Shao Wu knocked on the door. “Longlong?”
No answer came from inside.
“Longlong, it’s me, Brother Shao.” Shao Wu softened his voice. “I brought you something tasty. Want to try it?”
Yang Shuyi stood beside him without saying a word.
A few seconds later, the bedroom door opened. Longlong was still wearing her school uniform. “Brother Shao.”
A dark purplish-red abrasion covered her left cheek.
“…Here, you open it yourself.” Shao Wu crouched halfway down and held the pastry box out to Longlong. “Try them and tell me if they’re good, okay?”
Longlong looked at Yang Shuyi, then lowered her eyes to Shao Wu. “Thank you, Brother.”
“Go eat them inside,” Yang Shuyi said. “I’ll boil some water for you two.”
Shao Wu and Longlong went into the room and closed the door.
The room had originally belonged to Yang Shuyi, but over the past few days Longlong’s textbooks and exercise books had piled up across the desk, and a pink schoolbag stood on the windowsill. Longlong sat on the edge of the bed, holding the pastry box without opening it.
“Did you have a fight with your brother?” Shao Wu asked carefully. “Did he bully you? I’ll beat him up for you.”
Longlong lowered her eyes and shook her head.
Shao Wu sat beside her and looked down at her slightly chubby cheeks. The abrasion had already scabbed over, but he could imagine how much it must have hurt when it happened. His heart tightened. Yang Shuyi had said Longlong had been bullied at school. Was that how she had gotten the injury?
When Longlong still did not move, Shao Wu asked, “Why aren’t you eating?”
“I’ll get fat,” she said quietly, picking at the edge of the bed.
Shao Wu froze. Fat? Longlong was not fat at all, just sturdy. Grandma had once said it was because she used to train in sprinting at her elementary school in Yingxiu.
“You’re not fat. Who said you were?” Shao Wu held out his own arm. “Look, my arm is thicker than yours.”
Longlong looked up at him, then lowered her head again.
Seeing that she did not want to talk, Shao Wu did not force her. He simply sat with her. He picked up an exercise book from the desk at random. “Sixth Grade, Second Semester” was printed on the cover. Shao Wu looked at the cover, then at Longlong. Sixth grade. In September, Longlong would be starting middle school.
Middle school… When he thought of it that way, she was already half-grown.
“Your brother is actually really worried,” Shao Wu said gently. “He just looks calm. Even when something’s weighing on him, he doesn’t say it. Maybe he’s afraid of troubling other people. But this time he really didn’t know what to do, so he asked me to come over and talk to you.”
“He told me you were bullied at school and don’t want to go back, but he wouldn’t tell me exactly what happened. He’s a grown guy. He can’t exactly charge into your classroom and interrogate your classmates one by one.” Shao Wu smiled. “How about this? Tell me what happened, and I’ll help you think of something. I won’t tell your brother.”
Longlong bit her lip. After a long while, she blurted out, “I want to go back to Yingxiu.”
Shao Wu opened his mouth but could not speak. Longlong must have seen the news. The Wenchuan earthquake had reduced Yingxiu to ruins. She had to know. So how was he supposed to explain this to her? You can’t go back to Yingxiu. It hasn’t even been a year since the earthquake, and they’re still rebuilding there… Or: Longlong, your family there is gone.
Shao Wu forced down his emotions and asked, “Why do you want to go back?”
“…I want to go home.”
“Sweetheart.” Shao Wu could not help putting an arm around Longlong’s shoulders, his voice as gentle as it could possibly be. “Yongchuan is your home too. Maybe you still… aren’t used to it here, but Grandma, Grandpa, and your brother are all your family. Understand? They all love you.”
Longlong drew up her knees and rested her forehead against the pastry box, her voice muffled. “Brother Shao, stop worrying about me. Liu Chenyang and I already apologized to each other. We promised we won’t fight anymore.”
“Is Liu Chenyang your classmate?”
“He’s my deskmate.”
“Then how did you hurt your face?”
“He pushed me… I scraped it on the ground.”
“Then why did you two fight?”
Longlong’s body trembled, and suddenly there were tears in her voice. “He… he called me a jinx. He said Dad only went to Yingxiu because of me and my mom, and then… then he got caught in the earthquake.”
In an instant, Shao Wu went cold all over.
He could never have imagined words so… so vicious coming from a sixth-grade child.
“Brother Shao.” Longlong wiped away her tears and sobbed. “Tell my brother to let me go back to Yingxiu.”
“Longlong!” Shao Wu wrapped an arm around her shoulders and looked directly into her eyes. Slowly and clearly, he said, “Don’t believe any of that. The earthquake… nobody could have predicted the earthquake, understand? It had nothing to do with you.”
The moment Shao Wu finished speaking, the bedroom door suddenly opened. Yang Shuyi came in and crouched in front of Longlong. Shao Wu’s heart jolted. He had no idea how long Yang Shuyi had been listening outside the door.
Yang Shuyi’s chin and lips trembled faintly. He was forcing himself to hold something back, and when he spoke, his voice was so hoarse it sounded full of sand. He was not crying. There was not even a glimmer of tears in his eyes. But as Shao Wu stared at him, he could still feel thick, suffocating pain rising over Yang Shuyi like a tide.
“Longlong, there’s something I’ve never dared tell you.” Yang Shuyi closed his eyes, then opened them again. “My dad didn’t go to Yingxiu because of you. And it wasn’t because of Auntie Xiaojuan either…”
“It was because of me. I had a fight with him, and that’s why he took Auntie Xiaojuan to Yingxiu.”
“What happened to them had nothing to do with you… It was my fault, Longlong. It was all Brother’s fault.”