If being gifted at embarrassing oneself counted as talent, then Lu Xingyan had been blessed beyond measure.
Jiang Ji did not push him forcefully, because making too large a movement would only draw more attention. Fortunately, Sun Cheng suddenly appeared and interrupted someone’s endless clinginess.
“I queued a song for you. Come sing!”
Sun Cheng descended like a divine rescuer, yanked Lu Xingyan away, and shoved the microphone into his hand.
Two other guys joined him in making trouble. Unable to resist all three, Lu Xingyan was physically dragged onto the stage.
“Bro, save me—”
The dedicated performer could act anytime, anywhere. Jiang Ji imitated Lu Xingyan’s earlier tone. “Go sing.”
There was nothing Lu Xingyan could do. Even if he did not want to sing, it was his friend’s birthday, and he was not going to deliberately ruin everyone’s fun.
What he had not expected was to end up singing five or six songs in a row.
At first Jiang Ji listened seriously. Later, once they stopped singing properly and started fooling around with the microphones, his attention drifted and he began looking at his phone.
Although Jiang Ji was not much older than them biologically, the gap in psychological age felt considerable. It was like an adult had accidentally fallen into a crowd of children. He could not quite blend in.
Jiang Ji replied to several messages from his own friends. Roughly three songs later, he suddenly noticed someone sitting not far away who had only recently arrived.
A girl with long hair and a quiet air. Like him, she occasionally lowered her head to check her phone. Whenever she was not looking at her phone, her gaze followed the person singing onstage.
She was watching Lu Xingyan.
Jiang Ji was surprised and looked at her a few more times.
She did not notice she was being observed. She continued alternating at the same rhythm between checking her phone and watching Lu Xingyan, as though she were chatting with some friend about him.
Jiang Ji understood what she was thinking almost immediately.
Lu Xingyan had actually been right. There really was someone at tonight’s gathering who liked him.
That was hardly strange. Sun Cheng and Gu Xiaobo could both be called reasonably handsome if one was being polite, but beside them, Lu Xingyan looked almost too handsome to be an ordinary person. He also loved styling himself, with outfits coordinated every day and hairstyles that rarely repeated. He was far removed from the average male college student.
Someone like that naturally became the center of attention wherever he went. It would be stranger if nobody liked him.
Jiang Ji almost wanted to laugh. His idiot little brother might actually be somebody else’s Prince Charming.
At that thought, Jiang Ji quietly moved closer to the girl.
She had only just arrived and obviously did not know he was the brother of the person she liked. Slightly restrained, she greeted him. “H-hello?”
“Hello.” Jiang Ji lifted his phone, casually producing an excuse to start talking. “Sorry, do you have a power bank?”
“Ah, yes.” The girl opened her handbag, searched for a moment, then took out a wireless power bank and handed it to him.
“Thanks.” Jiang Ji discreetly covered the screen showing that his battery was still above seventy percent, attached the charger, then set his phone down and smoothly continued the conversation. “Why are you sitting here alone? Aren’t you going to choose a song?”
“I’m not very good at singing…” The girl gave a shy smile. Faced with a man as striking as a movie star, she was naturally bashful. “I came with my best friend. She went to the restroom. She’ll be back soon.”
In other words, she barely knew anyone here.
Jiang Ji understood and gave her a friendly opening. “Same. I came with someone else too. I hardly know anybody here.”
That helped her relax. Her gaze drifted forward again and found Lu Xingyan. He was currently singing an English love song in a tone that made Jiang Ji want to laugh the instant he heard it. Jiang Ji could practically see the words I am unbelievably cool floating around inside his head.
Jiang Ji followed her gaze, pretending not to know him. “Who’s that? Do you know him?”
“Mm, Lu Xingyan. I’ve seen him a few times before.” The girl blushed slightly. “I wouldn’t say we really know each other…”
“You like him?”
Jiang Ji asked so directly that she jumped. Realizing her behavior had given her away, she instinctively wanted to deny it, then decided there was no real reason to. She lowered her voice and quietly answered, “Yes.”
Jiang Ji finally thought tonight’s party had become interesting. “He is pretty handsome, I guess. But he doesn’t sing very well.”
“Really? I think he sings really well,” the girl said. “His pitch is accurate and the emotion comes through.”
Jiang Ji said, “…”
Was this the legendary romance filter?
Or did I have an anti-Lu-Xingyan filter? Why did hearing him sing love songs only make me want to laugh?
“How long have you liked him?” Jiang Ji softened his voice, taking on the manner of a caring older brother.
The girl did not know Jiang Ji and had never seen his usual cold expression, so she assumed he was naturally gentle and followed the atmosphere into conversation. “About two months, I guess. I first saw him a little over two months ago.”
“Love at first sight?”
“Mm. More or less.”
“It’s already been that long. Why haven’t you gone over to meet him?”
Jiang Ji watched curiously as hesitation passed across her face. She lowered her voice. “I heard he’s a brother-obsessed guy.”
Jiang Ji nearly choked on his own saliva. “What does that mean?”
Elio’s Notes: The Chinese term here is a joking coinage modeled on “mama’s boy.” Instead of being excessively attached to his mother, Lu Xingyan is rumored to be excessively fixated on his older brother, hence “brother-obsessed guy.”
“Well—” The girl glanced at the power bank she had loaned him, apparently deciding that this gave them enough of an acquaintance to trust him. “Don’t tell anyone, okay? Pretend I never said anything.”
“Mm. Go ahead.”
“I asked around. My friends know more about him than I do. They all say Lu Xingyan doesn’t want to date anyone, probably isn’t straight, and no matter who he’s talking to, he can’t get through three sentences without bringing up his brother.”
“He depends on his brother that much?”
“Who knows? According to him, he hates him. He can complain about his brother endlessly, but it comes across like someone deep in the closet. It’s exhausting.”
Once the girl got talking, she stopped being nervous and even stopped blushing. She suddenly let out a deep sigh. “So all my friends told me that unless I’m really that starving, I should never pursue a brother-obsessed guy.”
Elio’s Notes: “Hungry/starving” here is internet slang for being desperate or thirsty enough to consider a romantic prospect one normally would not. Jiang Ji deliberately echoes this wording later.
Jiang Ji said, “…”
He had overestimated Lu Xingyan. Apparently, this guy could not even maintain the illusion of being Prince Charming when he was outside.
Jiang Ji’s feelings became complicated. Out of brotherly affection, he wanted to defend Lu Xingyan and salvage his image a little, yet found himself with absolutely nothing to say.
He removed the power bank, returned it to the girl, and found an excuse to leave. If he stayed any longer and her best friend came back and recognized him, things would become awkward.
Jiang Ji returned to his original seat and sat down as though nothing had happened.
Lu Xingyan had already finished five songs. Halfway through the sixth, he became so perfunctory that he tossed down the microphone and stepped offstage to drink water.
From a distance, Lu Xingyan glanced at Jiang Ji, saw that nobody was sitting beside his brother, and relaxed. He turned, dragged Sun Cheng several steps away, and asked with a dark expression, “What’s wrong with your girlfriend?”
“What did she do?” Sun Cheng was confused.
“Her roommate came over and hit on my brother just now. That Qin Xiaoming—or Qin Xiaohong, whatever her name was. Can you control this situation?”
Elio’s Notes: Lu Xingyan first misremembers Qin Xiaoming’s given name using a different Chinese character with the exact same pronunciation, so the first mistake disappears in romanization. He then gets it even more wrong by guessing “Qin Xiaohong.”
“…”
Sun Cheng stared at him. “Her roommate hit on your brother, not my girlfriend. What exactly am I supposed to control?”
“How can you not control it?” Lu Xingyan said. “Other people don’t know what kind of relationship my brother and I have, but you do. Tell your girlfriend to tell her roommate—”
Sun Cheng paused. Lu Xingyan’s attitude today was strange, and it suddenly occurred to him that he might have missed another major development. He interrupted, “Wait. What exactly is your relationship with your brother now? Explain that first.”
Faced with his buddy’s sharp gaze, Lu Xingyan finally remembered that he was a man enduring humiliation in service of a magnificent plan. He coughed lightly. “It’s complicated. Anyway, all you need to know is that my brother cares about me a lot now.”
“Really?”
“Really. He was even jealous today. The moment he heard someone else liked me, he got unhappy.”
Sun Cheng’s eyes widened. He could not even imagine what Jiang Ji looked like while jealous. “Are you two together?”
“Not yet.”
Lu Xingyan tipped his head back, finished his water in one breath, crushed the plastic bottle, and tossed it toward the trash can in a beautiful arc. His mood was just as beautiful. “Our relationship is kind of complicated right now. Let me tell you…”
Lu Xingyan lowered his voice and briefly recounted the “toy” incident before saying with deliberate modesty, “He was the one who begged me first. I haven’t agreed yet.”
“…”
Sun Cheng’s mental CPU nearly burned out. “You mean that you, a straight man, are planning to become your brother’s little sex toy, and you’re proud of it?”
Lu Xingyan choked. “What do you understand? My plan is to seduce him. Now he’s taken the bait. Am I wrong?”
“Mm-hmm. Not wrong.” Sun Cheng chose surrender.
“Don’t act unconvinced,” Lu Xingyan said. “You think this kind of relationship means my brother is playing with me, but actually I’m playing with him. Haven’t you heard the saying? The most advanced hunter disguises himself as prey. I’m the hunter. I’m playing the fool so I can take down the tiger.”
Sun Cheng said, “…”
Sun Cheng suppressed the urge to die and found himself utterly without words. Lu Xingyan’s gaze was simply too firm, too full of conviction. For one brief, disorienting moment, Sun Cheng wondered whether… Lu Xingyan might actually be right.
Was Sun Cheng only thinking on the first level while Lu Xingyan was already on the fifth?
Could that really be possible?
Then what level was Jiang Ji on?
“Stop thinking. Your pig brain isn’t capable of understanding.” Lu Xingyan patted his buddy’s shoulder with the air of a master strategist who had everything under control. “You have one job. Control your girlfriend’s roommate. Tell her to know her place and delete Jiang Ji herself. Don’t make trouble for me.”
With his goal achieved, Lu Xingyan happily returned to his brother’s side like some intelligent little dog capable of walking itself and automatically navigating home, attaching himself to his owner again without regard for anyone watching.
At that moment, Jiang Ji was scrolling through Lu Xingyan’s Moments.
After talking to that girl, Jiang Ji had suddenly become curious about what this rumored “brother-obsessed guy” usually posted.
Yet from the newest post all the way back several months, nearly everything was nonsense. If one had to add an adjective, it was flashy nonsense.
“You’re back?” Jiang Ji shut off the screen and looked up at the king of nonsense. “When are they finishing? I’m getting sleepy.”
“It’s still early. We’re going to play games later.”
Lu Xingyan hung himself from his brother’s shoulder again as though he had no bones, pressing his head into the soft curve of Jiang Ji’s neck. “Are you bored? We can leave early if you want.”
“Let’s wait a little longer,” Jiang Ji said. “At least until he cuts the cake.”
The two of them curled into one corner of the sofa, each harboring his own scheme.
Jiang Ji was wondering whether he should use the girl from earlier to tease the idiot.
Lu Xingyan was wondering whether agreeing to become Jiang Ji’s toy tonight meant they were going to begin their new relationship and sleep together.
Would that be too fast? Should I be a little more reserved?
This doesn’t seem like something I should bring up first, but if I don’t bring it up, Jiang Ji isn’t bringing it up either… What’s wrong with this man? Why isn’t he in a hurry?
“Bro.” In the end, Lu Xingyan was the one who could not hold out. He suddenly said, “Let’s not go home tonight.”
The topic shifted so abruptly that Jiang Ji could not follow. “If we’re not going home, where are we going?”
“A hotel.” Lu Xingyan answered with complete seriousness. “Let’s get a room.”