It was already winter, and bitterly cold. Mai Ding pushed open the window and looked outside. If it was going to snow, why couldn’t it just snow properly? He hated this miserable mixture of rain and sleet—it was cold and not even pretty. Early that morning, Mai Ding rummaged around the apartment for ages before finally finding an umbrella. Usually when it rained, they could drive to school, but the car had happened to be sent in for maintenance the night before.
Only after getting everything ready did Mai Ding go wake An Zi Yan. “Hurry up and get out of bed. It’s pouring outside.”
“Then don’t go to school.”
“I refuse to encourage this terrible habit of yours. Hurry up.”
An Zi Yan reached out, pulled the noisy Mai Ding onto the bed, and wrapped his arms around him. “Go back to sleep.”
Mai Ding clenched his fists. That was close. I nearly gave in. He forced An Zi Yan off the bed. “Get up already. I’m running for class office again next semester. Don’t drag me down.”
“Cleaning monitor?”
“Bullshit. Academic representative.”
Mai Ding clearly saw the mocking curve at the corner of An Zi Yan’s mouth as An Zi Yan opened the wardrobe to change. “It’s too early in the morning. Stop making me laugh.”
Mai Ding hurled a pillow at him. “Who’s trying to make you laugh? I’m serious! We’ve only got a little over two years left before graduation. I’m going to concentrate on my studies, improve my grades, and become a useful member of society and the nation.”
“You’re still doing it.”
“AN ZI YAN!”
Outside, the rain only grew heavier. An Zi Yan held a blue umbrella over the two of them. Rain drummed against the canopy before running from its edges and splashing onto their shoes. Mai Ding stretched one palm outside the umbrella to collect some water and was just about to fling it into An Zi Yan’s face when An Zi Yan spoke before he could move. “Don’t do anything stupid.”
Bored, Mai Ding pulled his hand back and wiped the water on his pants. “How do you always know what I’m about to do?”
“Because every time you’re planning something, you get this scheming old-fox look on your face.”
“Nonsense. I do not. You must have planted a listening device inside my heart.”
“If I were going to plant something, it’d be a bomb.”
“You—!”
“What about me? All you know how to do is glare, throw things, and curse people.”
“I can cry too.”
“Woman.”
“If I weren’t womanly, how could I be the bottom? You’re the big man here. If you’ve got the guts, take your pants off in the middle of the street and prove how manly you are.” Mai Ding was deliberately provoking him.
“You’re the one who should take your pants off and prove to everyone that you’re a woman with a dick.”
“AN ZI YAN!”
“What? Going to glare, throw something, or curse at me again?”
“Fine, you win. I can’t outtalk you.”
“Then you shouldn’t have started.”
“I keep thinking someday I’ll finally beat you, so I have to keep trying every day.”
“I already told you to stop making me laugh. Which part didn’t you understand?”
“An Zi Yan, you have no respect for people.”
“You’re not worth respecting.”
Mai Ding argued the entire way to school. Only after An Zi Yan closed the umbrella did Mai Ding notice that one of An Zi Yan’s shoulders was soaked, while Mai Ding himself was perfectly dry. He had been too busy fighting with him to notice that the umbrella above them had been tilted toward Mai Ding the whole way. It would have been a lie to say he wasn’t touched. An Zi Yan tossed the umbrella to him and headed toward the classroom. Mai Ding hurried after him and hooked both hands around his arm. “An Zi Yan, you’re so sneaky. Don’t think distracting me with insults means I won’t notice when you’re being good to me.”
“Did you hit your head that hard?”
“Yeah. Your love knocked me senseless.”
An Zi Yan pulled Mai Ding’s hand away. “Get off me. You’re disgustingly sappy.”
Mai Ding immediately hooked his arm again. “No. If I move away, how am I supposed to hear you talk?”
“I told you to get off.”
“No.”
The rest of the class watched Mai Ding cling shamelessly to An Zi Yan and unanimously reached the same conclusion: who would have guessed Mai Ding’s skin was this thick? They could probably study it and turn it into bulletproof armor.
Mai Ding had been studying very seriously lately. Finals were approaching, and if he failed a subject, his dream of becoming the academic representative next year would be finished. Besides, he could no longer tolerate having grades that hovered stubbornly around the middle of the class, especially when An Zi Yan—who barely paid attention during lectures—continued scoring higher than him. Mai Ding could accept being underneath An Zi Yan in bed, but being underneath him academically too was devastating to his dignity. Thinking this, he glanced at An Zi Yan beside him, who was lounging against the back of his chair looking thoroughly bored. Seriously? He doesn’t even take notes, doesn’t review at home, while my hair is falling out by the handful and I’ve practically bitten my fingernails down to nothing.
“Have you been sleeping with all the teachers? Is that why they always give you such high marks?” Mai Ding suddenly asked in the middle of class, staring suspiciously at An Zi Yan.
An Zi Yan gave him a cold look. “You can try sleeping with them too. See if it gets you elected academic representative.”
“Then why are your grades better than mine?”
“You’re asking me? Who am I supposed to ask?”
“Do you have some secret study method you haven’t told me about? Husbands are supposed to share things. Don’t be stingy.”
“The only thing we share is our bodies.”
“Peh! Just wait. Once I become academic representative, I’ll be a class officer. You’ll just be an ordinary commoner beneath me.” Mai Ding placed an enormous reference book in front of himself and went back to chewing on his pen while puzzling over it. He absolutely refused to let An Zi Yan tutor him. He could not let the bastard discover just how stupid he really was.
One moment, An Zi Yan was watching the blazing fire of determination in Mai Ding’s eyes; the next time he turned his head, the guy was already asleep on top of his book. An Zi Yan could not suppress a quiet laugh. “Idiot.” When he saw Mai Ding curl in on himself with a slight frown, An Zi Yan took off his own coat and draped it over him.
The rain continued for the entire day, leaving everything outside gray and oppressive. Mai Ding’s neck eventually began aching from the way he was sleeping, and he finally opened his eyes. Other than An Zi Yan reading beside him, the classroom was completely empty. Mai Ding straightened up, and the coat slid to the floor. He picked it up, still warm, and handed it to An Zi Yan. “Where is everybody?”
“What everybody? School’s over.”
Mai Ding nearly collapsed. “School’s over? I slept the whole afternoon?” He started pounding An Zi Yan’s shoulder. “Why didn’t you wake me up? You made me waste an entire afternoon!”
“You were sleeping like a pig. Anyone who didn’t know better would’ve thought you were dead. All that noise and you still didn’t wake up.”
“N-no I wasn’t! I’m a really light sleeper. The slightest sound wakes me.”
“Right, right. Everyone else must have floated silently out of the room.” The entire class had made plenty of noise while leaving, yet somehow none of it had woken him. And he still had the nerve to say something this stupid.
“What kind of tone is that? You’re awful.”
An Zi Yan put on his coat and stood. “Hurry up. We’re going home.”
“Mm.”
Mai Ding packed his things, picked up the umbrella, and followed An Zi Yan. Just like that morning, the same blue umbrella covered them both, with nothing but the pitter-patter of rain around them. Mai Ding grabbed An Zi Yan’s clothes with one hand and the edge of the umbrella with the other, pushing it upright when it started tilting toward him again. He beamed at An Zi Yan. “No favoritism!”
A couple walking behind them began talking quietly. They thought they were whispering, but Mai Ding heard every word.
“Don’t tell me they’re doing that kind of thing.”
“Definitely. Didn’t you see the way that one keeps grabbing the other guy’s clothes?”
“Disgusting. And they’re so shameless about it too. Do that stuff at home. It’s uncomfortable just looking at them on the street.”
Mai Ding tried to pretend he hadn’t heard. His body instinctively moved closer to An Zi Yan, as though seeking shelter from something that had struck him from outside. An Zi Yan suddenly flicked the umbrella backward, spraying rainwater all over the couple’s faces and clothes. They were just about to get angry when An Zi Yan turned his icy expression toward them and placed one finger against his lips. “Shh. If you don’t want to get beaten, shut up.”
The man took one look at An Zi Yan and immediately lost his nerve. The woman was less willing to back down, especially now that the rain had ruined her makeup, but just as she opened her mouth An Zi Yan added, “Don’t assume I won’t hit a woman.”
After being threatened like that, the woman could only glare helplessly, since the boyfriend beside her did not look remotely capable of winning a fight. She redirected her fury toward him instead, stamping one high heel against the ground. “Are you even a man? You’ve completely humiliated me!”
“I—”
“What do you mean, ‘I’? Aren’t you always bragging about how tough you are?”
An Zi Yan took out his MP3 player, switched on some music, and placed the earbuds in Mai Ding’s ears. In an instant, Mai Ding’s world contained nothing but sweet music and An Zi Yan’s face.
Now you won’t have to hear anything else.
You said: Baby, this is a cruel world. You can’t survive it just by smiling.
I said: An Zi Yan, don’t I still have you? As long as I can lean on you, I’ll definitely make it through.
You said: What an idiot.
I said: Aren’t you the one who likes this idiot?
You said: Who told you I liked you?
I said: Who was the one who just called me “baby”?
You said: I was talking to that auntie collecting recyclables. It’s hard making a living that way these days.
I said: Even middle-aged aunties aren’t safe from you?
You said: I was willing to take you. Why wouldn’t I take her?
I said: What exactly is that supposed to mean?
You said: Exactly what it sounds like.
I once saw a set of pictures online that moved me for some inexplicable reason.
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