Futile Devices Scans

Let us return to the story after the battle to defend the city had ended and the flames of war gradually subsided.

Great Xuan and the Xiao Kingdom entered a long period of peace negotiations. The Xiao army withdrew northward, while Pacification Commissioner Li prepared to lead the relief forces south to the capital.

As a Deputy Commander of the Imperial City Directorate, Li Si naturally had to return to the capital and report on his mission. Zhang San, however, was a subordinate general in the Shengjie Army and the Militia Commander of Ant County. He had to remain in Jinyang with Wang Xu and his father, so he naturally could not go with him.

The little mandarin ducks were about to be torn apart yet again. Although Li Si already had a plan—once he returned to the capital, he would immediately resign from the Imperial City Directorate and request a transfer back to Jinyang—he was afraid that the new Emperor and the Empress Dowager might refuse, leaving him anxious and uncertain.

The two clasped hands before the army and gazed tearfully at one another. Seeing that it was growing late, Pacification Commissioner Li gave an awkward, thunderous cough.

Li Si reluctantly mounted his horse.

The army had been marching for nearly half an hour when Pacification Commissioner Li allowed his horse to fall back several paces. Seeing that Li Si’s little dark face was still tightly scrunched, he sighed. “Put your mind at ease. Once I return to the capital, I will do everything I can to arrange it. Jinyang’s defenses are of great importance, so the Empress Dowager must take them seriously. Having a capable assistant such as you return to Jinyang could only benefit her. She will not refuse.”

Li Si’s eyes were still damp as he obediently replied, “Thank you, Pacification Commissioner Li.”

Li Gang had known about Li Si and Commander Zhang for some time. Although Si’er was young, his temperament was steady and his conduct thorough. He could originally have enjoyed a splendid future. Cherishing both the boy and his talents, Li Gang could not resist sighing. “Your official prospects would naturally be better if you remained in the Imperial City Directorate…”

Li Si listened earnestly with his pair of clear little colt eyes. Looking into those utterly transparent eyes, Li Gang could not continue with the rest of his persuasion. Li Gang himself had struggled through the turbulent sea of officialdom because he wished to fulfill his ambitions, secure the people’s livelihood, and establish peace for generations to come. Si’er was simple by nature and did not understand such grand principles concerning the nation and the realm. He had no lofty aspirations—but if he remained in Jinyang to train troops, fight battles, defend the borders, and protect the people, was that not also securing the people’s livelihood and safeguarding peace for future generations?

Enough, enough. Everyone possessed different aspirations in life. Li Gang once again felt the reluctance of a father marrying off his daughter, but he still resolved to respect Li Si’s wishes and do everything possible to help him leave after returning to the capital.

Li Si’s third journey southward may be set aside for now. As for Zhang San, his soul promptly wandered off again, and he spent every day waiting for his colt.

The Empress Dowager issued an edict abandoning Kuiyuan City and allocated funds to rebuild Jinyang. The soldiers and civilians of Kuiyuan were to relocate into the new Jinyang, and a new prefect was dispatched to govern the city. For the time being, Kuiyuan’s former soldiers and civilians served as laborers, working together to expand the new city. With no battles to fight and nowhere to go killing enemies, Zhang San was ordered by Chief Commander Wang—who was now Pacification Commissioner Wang—to assist the new prefect in deploying soldiers and supervising construction. Zhang San therefore rode Big Black Ghost throughout the city every day to oversee the work.

Other officers supervising construction merely kept a diligent watch. Zhang San, however, had nowhere to expend his enormous strength, and lovesickness left him restless and frantic. He often joined the military laborers and worked alongside them. After a month or two, his entire body had been tanned glossy black. He had grown somewhat leaner, but even more powerful.

Ant County’s old town had been burned down in the fighting and was also being rebuilt. Elder Sister and her husband did not return to Ant County but moved to Jinyang instead. The couple erected a small wooden stall in the city’s new marketplace and began selling steamed cakes. Elder Sister’s cakes had thin skins and generous fillings, offering excellent quality at a fair price. They were so delicious that customers practically bleated with delight, and after eating them, everyone went back to work roaring with renewed strength. Men and women, young and old, all loved buying several whenever they passed. Elder Sister and her husband made and sold cakes from morning until night, so busy that their feet barely touched the ground.

Zhang San went to Elder Sister’s home at dusk to freeload dinner. Stuffing steamed cakes into his mouth, he complained, “I’ve been building walls for a whole month! Building walls is so boring! I want to fight! My hands are itching! I miss Sisi…”

Elder Sister had kneaded dough all day, and Brother-in-law had sold cakes all day. Both were so exhausted that their heads spun and their eyes blurred. Even the food they served Zhang San consisted of unsold cakes, since neither had the energy to cook anything else. The couple sat upon the same long bench, leaning against each other while silently eating. Their eyes were empty with fatigue, and neither paid any attention to the younger brother.

Seeing how exhausted they were, Zhang San rose with a cake clenched between his teeth and began kneading Elder Sister’s shoulders and pounding her back. She waved him away. “Both your paws are covered in grease. Don’t touch me! Rub your brother-in-law instead. Look at him—he’s nearly dead…”

Brother-in-law cried, “Ow… That hurts… Gently, gently, gently…”

Zhang San kneaded Brother-in-law until he bleated wildly, prompting him to refuse repeatedly. All three slumped listlessly inside the room.

Zhang San said, “I miss Sisi.”

Elder Sister replied, “Si’er gives better shoulder rubs than you.”

Zhang San said, “I miss Sisi.”

Elder Sister replied, “Si’er kneads cakes better than you too.”

Zhang San said, “I miss Sisi.”

Elder Sister replied, “Si’er does everything better than you. When he’s at home, he quietly helps with the work. He isn’t like you, a food-begging ghost who only knows how to flap his lips and howl.”

Zhang San wailed, “I miss Sisi!”

Elder Sister snapped, “Get out and go back to sleep!”

＊

After Elder Sister drove him back to the military camp, Zhang San encountered Wang Xu leading his horse toward him. Wang Xu had spent the day handling military affairs throughout the city and was also returning to camp.

Zhang San opened his mouth and immediately sighed. “Brother Xu, I miss Si—”

Long tormented by this refrain, Wang Xu covered one ear with one hand, seized his reins with the other, turned around, and fled like smoke.

Zhang San: “…”

＊

His heart was filled with melancholy, yet he had nowhere to release it. Fortunately, he still had two intimate brothers in whom he could confide. On his next rest day, he rode Big Black Ghost back to Ant County.

As previously mentioned, Ant County was also undergoing reconstruction. The new County Magistrate was still traveling there to assume his post, so County Commandant Liu and Clerk Chen were temporarily managing affairs. They were likewise so busy that their feet scarcely touched the ground and had no time whatsoever to entertain him.

Fortunately, Militia Commander Zhang’s return inspired great affection among the county residents, who crowded around the county yamen to watch him. When the brothers Zhou Qi and Zhou Ba heard the news, they even abandoned their work in the fields and summoned the former fortress residents to visit their old chief.

Zhang San built a fire in the rear courtyard of the county yamen. Together with the former fortress residents, he enjoyed a lively meal of roasted roe deer and baked flatbread…

By nightfall, the two men currently running the county yamen finally returned, only to discover the rear courtyard in utter disarray…

The fortress residents had already returned to their homes. Zhang San had drunk several flasks of wine and was slumped amid the mess with drunkenly unfocused eyes. When he saw Liu Wu enter, his mouth drooped and he called listlessly, “Brother Liu…”

Brother Liu’s eyelid twitched.

Sure enough, Zhang San’s next words were, “I miss Sisi…”

Liu Wu said to Chen Lu, “I have many duties tomorrow. I’ll give you a day off. You can keep him company.”

Chen Lu replied, “I accompanied him last time. He called for ‘Brother Liu,’ so naturally you should accompany him.”

Liu Wu fell silent. “Let’s settle it with finger-guessing.”

The two barked and yowled through several rounds. At last, Chen Lu gave a victorious cheer, and Liu Wu approached with a green face.

“Militia Commander, get up and go to sleep. Tomorrow, I’ll accompany you around the county so you can see how the reconstruction is progressing.”

“I miss Sisi…”

“Yes, yes, yes. Miss him all you like, but go to sleep first.”

“I miss Sisi…”

“A’Lu, why are you standing there laughing? Come and give me a hand! Tonight, you are writing a letter to Deputy Commander Li and urging him to return immediately. We cannot go on living like this!”

＊

When the spring flowers bloomed, a reply arrived from Deputy Commander Li. By then, however, he was a Deputy Commander no longer and would soon be transferred into the Shengjie Army. He was merely waiting for the Ministry of War’s formal transfer order, after which he would set out for Jinyang.

Zhang San beamed upon hearing the news. The mountains were high and the roads distant; even an ordinary messenger required more than ten days to make the journey. Since the letter had already reached him, by his calculations, Sisi should have departed by now!

He therefore wandered around the southern district every day. Under his relentless supervision, the new southern wall grew higher than every other section, making the city’s walls ever stronger and its artillery even more formidable.

He had assumed Sisi would ride quickly and arrive within ten days at most. Yet he waited and waited. More than half a month passed, but there was still no sign of him.

Could something have happened on the road? Or had the Empress Dowager and Pacification Commissioner Li changed their minds and refused to let Sisi leave?

Zhang San tossed and turned every night, unable to sleep. Eventually, he simply mounted his horse and patrolled everywhere. After being dragged out several nights in succession, the sleep-deprived Big Black Ghost also grew sick of him, snorting and kicking inside the stable whenever Zhang San approached and refusing to go out with him.

＊

At noon, Militia Commander Zhang—now loathed by man and ghost alike—lay sprawled inside a crenel of the southern gate tower. His entire upper body was wedged into the stone recess while his tiger backside stuck into the air. He stared into the distance and listlessly chewed a baked flatbread.

Seeing him radiate resentment toward the heavens, the surrounding soldiers kept their distance and quietly attended to their own duties.

Zhang San chewed the flatbread as though it were wax for a long time. The crumbs lodged in his throat and refused to go down, so he climbed up and searched for water. A soldier atop the wall turned and called, “Commander Zhang! Several carriages are approaching from the south! Take a look—could they be the people you’re waiting for?”

Standing beside a water vat, Zhang San gulped down an entire dipper of water. He wiped his mouth with a frown and answered without turning around, “He’s cavalry! Once he mounts a horse, he practically flies. Why would he ride in a carriage? They’re probably merchants from the south!”

The soldier turned his head back again.

＊

The carriages soon arrived beneath the city wall, where the guards responsible for inspections surrounded them.

The driver of the first carriage was dressed in the plain gray-and-white clothing of a servant, yet appeared far stronger and straighter than any ordinary servant. A black veiled hat covered his head, and he landed lightly upon the ground.

The inspecting guard was a new recruit and carried out his duty conscientiously. He lifted the curtain behind the driver and saw two elderly women inside. After apologizing for the disturbance, he lowered the curtain. The driver then took out his travel documents and handed them over for examination.

While the new guard was still carefully checking them, the driver asked, “Brother, may I trouble you with a question? Do you know where Commander Zhang San is presently stationed within the city?”

The guard had already seen the Ministry of War’s seal upon the documents. He saluted and said, “So you are a comrade from the army. Forgive my discourtesy. Commander Zhang has recently been working in the southern district. He should currently be atop the gate tower.”

The driver’s heart gave a jolt. After saying, “Thank you!” he hurriedly drove the carriage into the city and stopped beneath the wall. Turning back, he shouted, “Grandma! Mother! Wait here for me!” Then he pushed off with one foot and shot far into the distance.

＊

Zhang San crouched dispiritedly beside the water vat, yawning and raking his fingers through his tiger fur until it grew even more disheveled. Suddenly, a figure leapt atop the city wall, looked around, and then shot toward him like a cannonball.

Thud!

Caught completely off guard, Zhang San was nearly knocked into the water vat. The impact left him dazed. Li Si did not even bother removing his veiled hat before crashing into him and immediately gnawing at his mouth.

Zhang San mumbled, “Mm! Mmm… Sisi? Mmm…”

The two fiercely gnawed at one another, fortunately concealed by their veiled hats. The soldiers upon the wall thought an intruder had launched a surprise attack. Seeing from afar that the villain had tackled Commander Zhang the moment he arrived, they hurriedly drew their sabers and rushed to assist.

Commander Zhang, still engaged in his intense “battle,” called, “Nothing’s wrong! Nothing’s wrong! Return to your posts!” In a state of utter disarray, he dragged Li Si behind the large water vat. “Slow down. Everyone can see… Mmm… Mm…”

＊

A long while later, the two hurried down from the wall one after the other. As Zhang San ran, he anxiously said, “Why didn’t you tell me Grandma and Mother were here sooner? The two of us were fooling around up there and made them wait so long…”

Li Si had been kissed so thoroughly that he had never found an opportunity to speak. His lips swollen, he said, “Little Brother is here too…”

“Little Brother came back as well?” Zhang San exclaimed.

Qiao Shen was helping the two elders down from the carriage. He had just been suggesting that they come outside for some fresh air when he looked up and saw Third Brother and Fourth Brother running toward them with disordered clothes and flushed faces. As the younger brother, he understood priorities and immediately turned around and invited both elders back inside the carriage.

Qiao Shen coughed repeatedly. “Ahem, ahem, ahem!”

The two stopped before them and awkwardly straightened each other’s clothes, then wiped the saliva from each other’s chins. Li Si’s lips had even been bitten open, so Zhang San hurriedly pulled the veiled hat down over his head.

Zheng Jiu was driving the second carriage and leaned out from behind. He knew nothing of the secret between the two heroes and loudly asked, “We’ve been waiting so long! What happened?”

Hearing that something might have happened, Godmother hurriedly lifted the carriage curtain. “Si’er? What is it?”

Zhang San and Li Si panicked. One covered his face while the other pressed down the brim of his hat, and both stammered, “N-nothing!”

Li Si asked, “B-Brother Xiao, do you have somewhere for everyone to stay?”

Zhang San coughed. “We’ll go to the Qiao residence. The Qiao residence.”

Qiao Shen stared. “What? My home?”

＊

The Qiao residence had also been rebuilt. The Qiao family had once been prosperous and prominent. Their ancestral residence occupied an excellent location within Kuiyuan’s inner city and had not suffered too badly from the fires of war. It had merely grown old and dilapidated during the family’s decline in recent years. A month or two earlier, Zhang San had taken several dozen military laborers there during his rest days. They dismantled the old residence’s bricks, timber, and interior furnishings and transported everything back to Jinyang. The Prefect of Jinyang allocated a new plot of land for Prince Fu’s residence, and Zhang San led the men in reconstructing the Qiao home exactly as it had been.

The old steward, Uncle Rong, currently lived there. Zhang San had hired Cook Wu and her husband to watch over him, tend to his meals and daily needs, and clean and maintain the residence. Elder Sister and Brother-in-law temporarily had nowhere to live in Jinyang, so they were also staying there.

＊

On this journey to the capital, Li Si had brought back Godmother and Grandma. Qiao Shen also took the opportunity to bid farewell to the Empress Dowager. He relinquished the titles of Prince Fu and State Preceptor and requested to be entered into the Daoist registers. The Empress Dowager and the new Emperor conferred upon him the title of Temple Master of Jinyang Temple and appointed Zheng Jiu his Guardian Warrior, permitting him to return home.

The group also brought two of Zheng Jiu’s subordinates and two servants bestowed by the Empress Dowager. Together, they filled several carriages and traveled disguised as an inconspicuous merchant caravan. Because Grandma was elderly, they did not dare hurry day and night. The journey was therefore delayed, leaving Zhang San to wait several extra days.

＊

The entire group bustled around settling into the Qiao residence. Rooms had to be swept and washed, bedding and daily necessities prepared, and food arranged. For some time, the residence was filled with noise and excitement. As the head steward, Uncle Rong was exceptionally skilled at organizing such matters. Having welcomed his young master home and resumed his former profession, the old man’s face glowed with happiness and his voice rang with vigor. He did not feel tired in the slightest.

They remained busy until nightfall, when the meal was finally served. More than ten people filled an enormous table. With tears brimming in his eyes, Uncle Rong said emotionally, “When this old man was young, I kept the household accounts. The late master and mistress were both still alive. During festivals and holidays, the residence was just as lively as this…”

Remembering his brief childhood, Qiao Shen’s eyes also filled with tears. “Uncle Rong… Boohoo…”

Elder Sister had to take control of the situation. She hurried from the kitchen carrying an enormous wine jar beneath each arm and easily set them upon the table. “This is a joyous day. Elder, don’t be sad. Come, have a cup to warm yourself first. Third Brother, stop pestering Fourth Brother over there and hurry up and pour wine for the elders! Fifth Brother, wipe away your tears. You’re still young, so you’re not allowed to pour yourself any wine—and you’re not allowed to pour any for your Fourth Brother either!”

The dishes were complete and the wine bowls full. At the table, there was no distinction between men and women, young and old, noble and lowly. Everyone took a seat, happily raised their cups, and talked amid the lively celebration.

Zhang San asked how everyone had fared. Qiao Shen told him that Pacification Commissioner Li had become Chancellor and now labored day and night. Superintendent Li remained Superintendent of the Imperial City Directorate and had earned the Empress Dowager’s trust and reliance. Tao Shi had taken Li Si’s former position and become a Deputy Commander of the Imperial City Directorate.

Zhang San then asked Zheng Jiu why he had not remained in the capital and continued serving as a Deputy General of the Immortal Fire Army. Perhaps he might even have become a great general. Zheng Jiu repeatedly shook his head and offered several polite excuses. Later, using a toast as an excuse, he leaned toward Zhang San and whispered, “Militia Commander Zhang, please don’t think so highly of this humble one. With my meager ability, how could I become a great general? I’d lose my life after only a few exchanges upon the battlefield. I once followed that demonic Daoist and possess no real skill. Even though I abandoned darkness for the light, the Empress Dowager might not trust me. One day, she might send me to guard the imperial mausoleums. I’m better off following Prince Fu—ah, following Daoist Master Shen—to the north as his guardian. The heavens are high and the emperor is far away; up north, we can live freely and comfortably.”

Zhang San laughed and slapped him heartily upon the back. “You’re clever, I’ll give you that!”

Zheng Jiu grinned. “You flatter me, you flatter me.” He glanced around the table and lowered his voice again. “Besides, the Empress Dowager is also wary of Daoist Master Shen. She sent two men who are supposedly imperial servants, but they are actually here to keep watch over him. Since I came with Daoist Master Shen, at least he has someone nearby who can support him, right?”

Zhang San raised an eyebrow and lightly slapped his back once more. “You’ve got a conscience too.”

Zheng Jiu said, “Heh, you flatter me. Mainly, I came for the freedom and comfort. Hehe.”

＊

Li Si could not understand such intrigue and had no desire to listen. The food served that day had been prepared by Elder Sister and Cook Wu, while their husbands had also helped in the kitchen. The entire table was filled with Li Si’s favorite dishes! He had not tasted their cooking in several months!

How could he spare the conversation any attention? He buried his entire head in the food and glowed from head to toe with happiness.

Once Zhang San finished catching up with everyone, he also began eating and drinking. Seeing Li Si eat so obediently, he secretly took one of his hands beneath the table and played with Sisi’s fingers.

The touch made Li Si’s heart itch. He suddenly put down his chopsticks with his free hand and reached toward Brother Xiao’s wine bowl.

Zhang San stopped him. “What are you doing?”

Li Si honestly answered, “I… I want to drink too.”

“You always cause trouble when you drink. You’re not allowed!” Zhang San leaned over and bit Li Si’s ear as he whispered, “Little Fool, do you want to spend tonight with me or not? What will we do if you become muddled from drinking?”

Li Si looked at him eagerly. “Just one sip… One sip, and you’ll grow a tail.”

Zhang San stared. “What did you say?”

“You’ll grow a tail, and ears too. They’re furry and very beautiful.”

“I think you’re already muddled!” Zhang San pinched his backside hard. “You’re the one who grows a horse’s tail!”

Li Si cried, “Aah!”

Elder Sister shouted, “Zhang San! Is your hide itching again?”

＊

Elder Sister proceeded to enforce family discipline at the table, which may be set aside for now. Once everyone had eaten and drunk their fill, the entire household was warm and harmonious, and all praised Elder Sister and Cook Wu’s delicious cooking. Brother-in-law lamented how hard his wife had been working and mentioned that their steamed-cake stall was doing excellent business lately. Unfortunately, their profits were small, and they could not yet afford to hire help. The couple planned to endure for the time being, save enough money to rent a small shop, and employ one or two apprentices.

Li Si, who had silently eaten throughout the conversation, suddenly raised his head and said clearly, “Elder Sister, open a restaurant.”

Elder Sister froze. “What restaurant?”

“Open a large restaurant. Elder Sister Wu can join you, and you can hire more helpers.”

Elder Sister laughed. “Si’er, you’ve never run a business, so you don’t understand. Opening a restaurant costs a great deal. An ordinary household cannot afford it…”

Li Si asked blankly, “Does it require that much? Would eight hundred guan be enough? If not, I’ll write to Superintendent Li and press him again. He said the imperial court would have money after the New Year, and they still owe me another five thousand guan.”

Prices in Jinyang were nothing like those in the capital. Eight hundred guan would have been enough to purchase the enormous Qiao residence. Elder Sister froze, then hurriedly refused. “You mustn’t! You mustn’t! Good Si’er, keep that money to care for your family.”

Li Si calculated seriously. “I kept two hundred guan and still have some savings from before. Mother, is that enough?”

Godmother smiled. “Good child, it’s enough. More than enough. Eldest Daughter, use the money without worry.”

Elder Sister was astonished and still tried to refuse. Blind Grandma suddenly spoke in a resounding voice. “Good granddaughter, use it without worry! We are all one family! His mother and I will still have to rely upon you youngsters to care for us in the future. Third Brother, give this old woman another lion’s-head meatball. I need to fill my stomach quickly and go to sleep.”

Elio’s Notes: “Lion’s head” (狮子头) is a large Chinese meatball dish, traditionally made with pork. Its name refers to the meatball’s rounded appearance rather than containing lion meat.

Showing his tiger teeth in a grin, Zhang San sprang to his feet and briskly placed food in Grandma’s bowl. Then he shamelessly whispered to Elder Sister, “Sister, don’t worry about spending it. Sisi’s money is my money… Ow, ow! My ear! That hurts…”

＊

Even shifty, pig-headed Zheng Jiu sensed something unusual. Leaning toward Qiao Shen, he whispered, “Your Highness, are they… truly one family?”

Qiao Shen had taken advantage of Third Brother’s beating to pour half a bowl of wine into Fourth Brother’s cup. He was sneaking back to his seat when he turned and whispered the gossip, “Yes. I’m family too. If Fourth Brother’s money isn’t enough to open the restaurant, I can contribute some as well. But Third Brother and Fourth Brother are especially ‘family.’ Oh, you know—that kind of ‘family.’”

Zheng Jiu suggestively pressed two plump fingers together. “This kind of family?”

Qiao Shen nodded. “Exactly!”

Realization dawned on Zheng Jiu. “No wonder they always beat me together! I thought something was strange between them as soon as they arrived in Ant County…”

Adding fuel to the gossip, Qiao Shen asked, “Guess which of them ‘bullies’ the other?”

Zheng Jiu replied, “That’s difficult to guess. They are both so skilled that they probably have to fight it out upon the bed.”

＊

Guardian Zheng’s words proved prophetic. That night, the two truly fought a battle upon the bed. Li Si, who had secretly drunk half a bowl of wine, insisted on feeling the tiger’s tail and rubbing the tiger’s ears, embarrassing Brother Xiao until he was both furious and flustered. “What tail? There is no tail!”

With hazy eyes, Li Si felt around his chest. “There’s fur here too. It’s so soft.”

“I don’t have chest hair! Be gentler and stop pulling randomly!”

Furious and exasperated, Zhang San pinned Li Si to the bed. “I told you not to drink! I’ve been celibate for two months and I’m nearly dying from holding it in! If you’re useless tonight, I—I’ll bite off your horse tail!”

He pounced like a starving tiger and pulled down Li Si’s trousers. Upon seeing the ramrod-straight “horse tail,” his anger faded slightly. “It looks quite useful.”

＊

Whether it truly proved useful was uncertain. In the middle of the night, however, an enormous crash thundered through the Qiao residence and woke everyone except the elders.

They had all survived the war and rushed from their rooms in alarm, asking one another, “What happened? What happened? What collapsed?”

Only Cook Wu and her husband, who had lived in the county yamen’s rear courtyard for a long time, had anticipated the night’s excitement. The couple remained perfectly calm, rolled over, and went back to sleep.

＊

Well, the Qiao residence’s old bed had gone too long without maintenance. It collapsed the moment the pair began galloping. The room was filled with flying dust and could no longer be occupied. Since they could not clean another room in the middle of the night, the two carried their bedding to the woodshed.

The firewood was hard and covered in splinters. Laying the bedding over it made it barely possible to sleep, but galloping was out of the question. Zhang San pulled Sisi into his arms and bit him fiercely several times. Frustration made his tiger eyes glow green in the darkness. “Go to sleep!”

Knowing how stifled he felt, Li Si whispered, “I can use my hand to help you.”

“Forget it. We’ll dirty our clothes and bedding, and they’ll need washing tomorrow! So many people laughed at us in the courtyard earlier. If they see us washing the bedding tomorrow, who knows how they’ll mock us? And what if some loudmouth tells Mother and Grandma…”

Sleeping elsewhere in the residence, Qiao Shen sneezed and sniffled drowsily.

Li Si blinked and whispered again, “Then I can use my mouth…”

“How are you such a considerate little lecher? Stop tempting me! If I truly can’t endure it, I’ll tear you into pieces and eat you!”

After being scolded several times and gnawed repeatedly upon the cheeks, Li Si felt wronged and buried his face in the furry, soft, fluffy tiger chest before falling asleep.