“Dong, dong-dong…”
“Dry air, beware of fire hazards~”
“Pa, pa-pa…”
Damn it! Are they filming a period drama or what?! It’s the middle of the night—are the people upstairs even planning to sleep?!
“Dong, dong-dong…”
“Dry air, beware…”
Tch! He’s getting addicted to this now, huh?! If I don’t show some power, they’ll really think I’m some sickly kitten!
With one flip of his body, he executed a clean and graceful kip-up—
“Wah!” A startled scream echoed and echoed… though at most it was only enough to make the dogs in the nearby houses twitch their ears.
Fuck, whose brilliant idea was this?! Is this bed made of iron?!
One hand rubbed his numbed legs while the other kneaded his aching lower back where it had slammed painfully against something hard. His brows furrowed tightly as his lively black eyes slowly opened. Half-asleep and half-awake, they lacked some of their usual clarity and instead carried a hazy daze that made him oddly lovable. His thick, fan-like eyelashes fluttered in confusion like tiny brushes.
A… single-story house? And not even a concrete roof! Roof tiles, wooden beams, straw huts! And instead of streetlights for illumination they were using… lanterns…
“Dry air, beware of fire hazards~”
“Pa, pa-pa…”
A night-watch uncle—or grandpa—faithfully carrying out his duties…
“Pa!” — It hurts…
Another slap! — It really freaking hurts…
“AHHH!!”
Within the imperial capital of the Hua Dynasty, from some random alleyway corner, a heart-rending howl erupted that sounded suspiciously like a pig being slaughtered. It instantly startled households across several streets into a frenzy of barking dogs and crowing chickens. Lamps lit up one after another, though not long after, they all went dark again.
What kind of world is this?!
The certain someone was utterly dumbfounded, so shocked he no longer even had the strength to keep yelling.
Back in modern times, Ning Xuan might not have been some dazzling child of destiny admired by the masses, nor some rich second-generation heir everyone fought over, but at the very least he had been elegant, suave, handsome, and charming. Even if he had never made it to home base, and even holding hands or kissing beautiful girls was still stuck in the trial phase, he had always been completely confident in his own appeal. But now…
Are ancient people really this cold-hearted…?
An endless sorrow welled up in Ning Xuan’s heart, leading him to a profound conclusion: history textbooks were obviously pseudoscience. Nothing but whitewashed propaganda.
Though it was summer, the night breeze still felt chilly and biting. Ning Xuan tugged his collar tighter around himself, only for the smooth texture of high-quality satin beneath his fingertips to make him freeze again. Hesitating for a long while, he finally lowered his head to inspect himself.
Damn it! Are there just too many people time-traveling these days, making the settings more and more detailed? Or was I just so damn foresighted that I got changed before being scared senseless? Look at these wide sleeves and robes—but where the hell did my jeans and T-shirt go?!
Why is it that whenever other people time-travel, they all end up on soft beds in noble families? Even the worst-case scenario is becoming some martial alliance leader or sect master. And if things get really melodramatic, at least they end up as somebody’s bedwarmer lying somewhere comfortable! So why, when it’s finally my turn, do I end up on this hard, filthy place without even a blanket? I don’t even get one final decent night’s sleep before some night-watch uncle wakes me up with his racket!
Unable to care about anything else anymore, Ning Xuan suddenly noticed a cold metal tag hidden beneath his sleeve.
“Ning… Xuan…?”
It would have been better if he had not looked. The moment he realized it was a name tag, he exploded.
Damn it! Do they really think I’m an idiot? Sure, I crossed through time, but how could I possibly forget my own name?!
Flinging his sleeves aside, he stood up, though what little elegance and roguish charm he had was immediately ruined by his unfamiliarity with the wide-sleeved robes, making him stumble around awkwardly.
“Hmph. When a tiger falls to the plains, even dogs bully him. Now even a lousy set of clothes is picking a fight with me!”
While grumbling curses under his breath, Ning Xuan had barely walked a few steps when he heard hurried footsteps coming from the street corner. Instantly curious, he poked his head out to look. Aside from the dried-up exhibits displayed in museums and the ancient people he had seen on television, he had never actually seen living, breathing ancient people in real life before. His curiosity surged at once.
Turning the corner, he saw two men hurrying along as if racing toward something. One carried a large sack over his shoulder while the other walked empty-handed, constantly glancing around nervously like he had done something guilty.
“This time we’re definitely screwed. We promised two virgins, but one of them escaped! Damn bad luck. Tell me, how the hell did that weak little scholarly brat have so much strength?” The empty-handed man spat angrily to the side. “If we don’t finish this job and can’t find another one, those people from the Prince’s Estate aren’t the kind anyone wants to mess with.”
“Brother, there’s no use telling me all this. I sympathize with you, but I can’t help either. We’re insignificant nobodies—that’s just how it is~” Though carrying what looked like a heavy sack, the other man walked so lightly he practically floated. “I’ve only got two hands, don’t I? Even if I wanted to free one up to help, this little thing isn’t exactly easy to handle either.” As he spoke, he smacked the sack hard.
“You just enjoy other people’s misery! Fortune always turns eventually—your turn’ll come sooner or later!” the man snarled through gritted teeth, mentally cursing the escaped boy’s ancestors eighteen generations over.
The other man merely smiled. They both knew full well that trafficking people for money was a rotten business. But when survival itself was difficult, when every meal was uncertain, conscience was far too luxurious a thing. They did not even dare think about the future. Being able to survive the present was already hard enough.
Suddenly spotting a figure by the entrance of Jingtai Cloth Shop, the man carrying the sack immediately lifted his leg and kicked his companion.
The man, already gloomy to begin with, nearly exploded in anger after being kicked behind the knee. “What the hell was that for?!”
“Brother, I just saved your life—you should be thanking me!” he said while jerking his chin toward a certain direction.
Meanwhile, Ning Xuan stretched out his neck and sharpened his ears, trying desperately to listen, but he could only catch scattered fragments and had no clue what they were actually saying. He could not help cursing inwardly:
My hearing sucks when listening to English, fine—but how the hell is my Mandarin this bad too?! Is this what people mean by a generation gap?
Watching the two figures approach closer and closer, Ning Xuan suddenly became nervous. Ancient people had all sorts of rules and etiquette. What if they opened with classical Chinese the moment they spoke? Should he pretend to be deaf and mute? Or should he just run?
“Tsk! Heaven really hasn’t abandoned me.”
Once he got close enough to see Ning Xuan clearly, the man rubbed his hands together excitedly.
“Little brother, all alone?”
…Why was it that after finally time-traveling to ancient times, the very first thing that happened was getting hit on by another man…
Futile Devices Scans 
Leave a comment