Futile Devices Scans

The woman released Zhi Li’s chin and then stomped on him hard a couple more times. Why wasn’t Zhi Li fighting back? Was it simply because she was a woman—or an exceptionally beautiful woman? Su You Yan took off her glasses and tossed them onto the floor.

“Oh my, oh my. Your little girlfriend is angry. Don’t be so impatient. How about we make a bet?”

“Hey…” Zhi Li had only managed a single word before the woman pressed a finger against his lips and pursed her red mouth. “No one’s allowing you to speak right now. Sit there obediently, or else…” She whispered softly into Zhi Li’s ear. Zhi Li frowned. Ke Bu wasn’t stupid; he could roughly guess what she’d said. She was definitely using the rest of them as leverage against Zhi Li. If only she were a man. If she were a man, Zhi Li would probably be able to beat her.

“Back to what I was saying. Want to bet?”

“Bet on what?” Su You Yan asked cautiously.

“Which one of you can make me cry.”

Ke Bu had never heard of such a bizarre wager. People made bets about making others laugh, sure, but making someone cry? Had this woman forgotten what it felt like to cry? Or was this some kind of trap? Witches didn’t have tears.

“If you win, I’ll let all of you leave. But if you lose, he has to stay here with me. Of course, you don’t really have any other choice. The front gate has already been locked.” The woman pointed at Zhi Li.

“A-As long as we make you cry?” Gong Zhu asked. Meanwhile, Zhang Luo had somehow produced a laptop and was already trying to search for information about the woman.

Chu Hao Yu rolled up his sleeves. “Everyone, get her! We’ll beat her until she cries.”

“If you have the ability, that is.” The woman somehow had a silver knife in her hand. She lightly sliced across her skirt, opening a slit along the side. The long legs that had been restrained by the dress were revealed. Chu Hao Yu swallowed. She had already been terrifying while wearing that tight dress. Their chances of winning looked slim.

Ying Xiu Jie plopped down onto the floor and rested both hands on his knees. “Then I’ll go first. Once upon a time, there was a warrior—the bravest man in town. Every day he trained diligently in martial arts, cutting down corrupt officials above and criminals below. He was truly, truly heroic. But one day, his master led him into a small room and, while he was off guard, crippled his martial arts and sealed his meridians so he could never practice again. From then on, he became a useless cripple. How tragic. Truly tragic.” As he told the story, Ying Xiu Jie kept pounding his thigh.

What kind of terrible story was that?! It had no beginning or end and was completely all over the place! And where exactly was the sad part? Ke Bu had never understood what went on inside Ying Xiu Jie’s head. The woman sat on the sofa without the slightest reaction and merely raised an eyebrow, signaling for the next person.

With a pale face, Zhou Xin He stepped forward. “Once upon a time, there was a girl who returned home full of joy and excitement. She wanted to prepare a lavish dinner for her family. But when she opened the refrigerator, she suddenly burst into tears because… because she discovered there wasn’t a single ingredient left inside that could be used to cook a meal!”

The story was almost as awful as Ying Xiu Jie’s! Did these people even realize what kind of situation they were in?

Then Chu Hao Yu spoke. “A gorgeous woman with a stunning figure and a handsome man were passionately entangled together on a bed. The man slowly began undoing her clothes. One button, two buttons… and then suddenly! He discovered that her once-plump breasts had started sagging and wrinkling. Unable to believe his eyes, he closed them for a moment and opened them again. Not only had her chest changed—even her face had started deforming. In the end, she turned into the old cleaning lady from school!!”

This was definitely a nightmare Chu Hao Yu had once had. Had he actually cried when he woke up? Ke Bu turned to look at Gong Zhu and gave him an encouraging look. Gong Zhu was the best storyteller among them. All those tragic plots from novels and manga—now was the time to use them. Gong Zhu nodded and cleared his throat before beginning.

“He was mute. He couldn’t tell others about his favorite foods, couldn’t talk about the books he loved, and couldn’t even say the words ‘I love you’ to the person he loved most. The little mute could only watch his beloved from afar—watching him stroll beneath the sunset, watching him walk his dog, watching him laugh happily with his girlfriend and receive a matching heart-shaped phone charm from her. It was sad, but the little mute was content. He didn’t have the courage to approach him, nor the courage to speak even if they stood face-to-face. All he could do was remain silent.”

That was a good start. This one might actually work. Ke Bu secretly observed the woman’s reaction.

“One night, as usual, the little mute followed behind the young man from a distance. Suddenly, he noticed a phone charm lying on the ground. He recognized it immediately—it was the one the girlfriend had given him. It must be very important to him, right? The little mute picked it up and was about to chase after him when a hand suddenly covered his mouth from behind. He couldn’t make a sound. He couldn’t move. Another man dragged him into a room and threw him onto a bed. Clutching the phone charm tightly, the little mute shook his head desperately and retreated backward. Why was this happening? Without the charm, the young man would surely be anxious. He’d search everywhere for it. After all, it was a gift from his girlfriend. Ignoring all resistance, the man began stripping off his clothes. Then came a sudden chill, followed by something burning hot that took away the little mute’s first time. As the bed rocked violently, tears silently streamed down the little mute’s face. Blood trickled down his thigh. Gradually, he cried harder and harder. Looking back at the man’s face, he wanted to say something but couldn’t. The feeling was one of overwhelming sorrow and loss.”

Ke Bu had to admit that even he was beginning to get drawn into the sadness of the story.

Then Gong Zhu delivered the conclusion.

“The saddest part was that, as a mute, he couldn’t even moan. He wanted to cry out—‘Ahh~~ a little to the left~~ harder~~ ahh~~’—but he couldn’t. He couldn’t even do something that basic.”

The story was building up so earnestly, only to end like that?!

After all that pure-hearted emotional buildup, that was the conclusion? This little mute wasn’t some tragic romantic at all—he was just a desperately horny guy! Ke Bu was so exasperated he genuinely felt like crying.

Su You Yan looked at the woman. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re old and ugly? Your face is full of wrinkles, your breasts are uneven, your butt is too big, and you have carrot-shaped legs. You’re already at your age and still can’t give birth to a son, and on top of that, no man wants you.”

Admittedly, if an ordinary woman heard herself being insulted like that, she might cry. Someone like Zhou Xin He, for example, would probably be devastated. But this woman was so beautiful and so confident that Su You Yan’s insults felt completely detached from reality.

“Sharp little tongue.” The woman sounded amused rather than offended. “Hearing you say those things really hurts my feelings.”

She seemed bored with the stories and crossed her legs.

“There’s no one left, right? And I haven’t cried. Since that’s the case, he belongs to me now. You can all leave.”

“No.”

Ke Bu suddenly spoke up.

“I’m not giving him to you.”

“Why?” the woman asked. “What is he to you?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Then what business is it of yours? What if he’s willing to stay?”

A cold smile appeared on the woman’s lips.

Ke Bu froze for a moment and turned to look at Zhi Li, only to find Zhi Li watching him with obvious interest.

“He wouldn’t agree to it. Because… because…” Ke Bu clenched his fists and bit his lower lip. “Because no matter how beautiful you are, the only person he likes is me. And the only person he’s allowed to like is me.”

“Likes?” The woman swung one leg lazily. “Unless I’m mistaken, you’re a boy.”

“Who says feelings like love have gender restrictions? I like him. Even if he’s a man, I still like him. I like him, I like him, and I insist on liking him. You can scold me and I’ll still like him. You can hit me and I’ll still like him. Even if it makes you uncomfortable, even if it makes everyone uncomfortable, I’ll still like him.”

The woman stood up and was about to say something when Zhi Li, who had been sitting on the floor this whole time, finally spoke.

“Have you had enough fun yet?”

“Had enough fun?” The woman stomped on Zhi Li’s stomach again, putting even more force into it. “You think I’ll forgive you just because of that?!”

Zhi Li didn’t fight back. He simply let her continue stepping on him.

“You only come to visit me once in ages. If you’re treated like this, it’s your own fault. And haven’t you been getting too soft at school? You’ve become so weak that I knocked you down without effort. That’s pretty embarrassing, Zhi Li.”

The woman had actually called Zhi Li by name.

Ke Bu’s brain exploded.

What was going on?

Could somebody explain this?

No one had called Zhi Li by name the entire time, and what was that conversation even supposed to mean?

Ke Bu couldn’t process it anymore.

His mind had completely short-circuited.

“Consider it a welcoming gift.”

Zhi Li pushed her leg aside, stood up, and dusted the dirt off his stomach.

“Too late.” The woman kicked at him petulantly. “I should stomp you to death, you unfilial brat.”

A moment later, however, she suddenly threw herself into Zhi Li’s arms like a child and hugged him tightly.

“I missed you to death. Did you miss me? My precious son.”

Ke Bu’s life force instantly plummeted.

What was happening now?

He felt like he was about to break down.

At last, he understood where Zhi Li’s genes had come from.

This witch was actually Zhi Li’s mother!!

Was this some kind of joke?!

He desperately wished it wasn’t true.

“Stop pretending to cry.”

The woman looked up.

“How boring.”

Then she turned toward the group, all of whom had been completely petrified, and smiled.

“You must be Zhi Li’s friends. Sorry for the poor hospitality. I haven’t properly introduced myself yet.”

She paused.

“I’m Lan Yin, Zhi Li’s older sister.”

Hadn’t she literally just called Zhi Li her son?

And now she had the nerve to shamelessly claim she was his older sister?

Their surnames weren’t even the same!

The entire group accepted this revelation with the intelligence of stunned idiots.

But the one who most wanted to die right now was undoubtedly Ke Bu.

The words he had just declared moments ago kept replaying in his mind like a broken recording.

Just die.

Commit seppuku right now.

There’s still time.

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