Futile Devices Scans

Lin Yi acted like a beast the entire night, but in the end managed to recover a bit of humanity. He cleaned Zhou Ruo An’s body and even gave him a simple bath.

Everything that could and could not be seen, everything that could and could not be touched, had already been thoroughly explored. Zhou Ruo An simply let him do as he pleased. In the end, he was carried back to bed.

Held in Lin Yi’s arms, his back pressed against the man’s chest, Zhou Ruo An could faintly feel the strong, steady heartbeat beneath flesh and skin, gradually blending together with the rhythm of his own heart.

Zhou Ruo An was not used to this feeling. He tried to pull away, only to be dragged back again.

Lin Yi said nothing. He merely lit a cigarette, draping one arm over Zhou Ruo An’s sunken waist while holding the cigarette beyond the edge of the bed.

Zhou Ruo An gave up struggling. Since he could not break free, he simply stopped caring. Leaning against Lin Yi’s chest, he dragged the man’s hand toward himself and took a drag from the cigarette. The smoke swirled briefly in his mouth before he exhaled it.

“Does it still hurt?” Lin Yi asked beside his ear.

“It hurts.”

Zhou Ruo An was not lying. It still hurt, but there was also some other indescribable feeling tangled within it, something impossible to clearly define, something that made him afraid to dwell on it.

Lin Yi lightly kissed behind Zhou Ruo An’s ear, sounding almost sincerely apologetic.

“Next time I’ll watch some videos and learn a bit more.”

Zhou Ruo An raised his fingers, looking at the fading bite marks on them, and mocked him.

“And these? Did you learn these from videos too? If you’d put this much effort into school back then, maybe you could’ve gotten yourself a university diploma.”

Lin Yi rested the cigarette on the ashtray and freed a hand to rub Zhou Ruo An’s long fingers.

“These don’t need learning,” he said. “Talent is enough.”

“Fuck.” Zhou Ruo An rested his head against Lin Yi’s arm, shifting into a comfortable position as his eyelids slowly drooped. Even his voice became sleepy. “Lin Yi, when you hold me, do you actually feel anything? Doesn’t it feel like hugging one of your bros?”

The man’s waist lifted slightly in silent proof that yes, he definitely felt something.

Zhou Ruo An sighed softly.

“I’ll find you someone prettier, okay? Someone even better-looking than me. If you only like my type, then I’ll pay for someone to get plastic surgery.” He turned his head slightly, cheek brushing Lin Yi’s chin. “Since all you like is this face of mine, I’ll get you another one that looks about the same.”

Lin Yi lowered his gaze toward the man in his arms. They were too close; their eyes collided before his gaze could even fully settle.

“Do you know when I first noticed you?” Lin Yi asked, answering with a different question while picking up the cigarette again.

Zhou Ruo An thought for a while but could not find the answer.

Lin Yi pointed toward the window with the cigarette between his fingers.

“That’s where I first noticed you.”

Zhou Ruo An followed the gesture toward the window.

“You were inside, and I was outside?”

“Yeah. You were probably eleven or twelve that year. It was winter too, deep into the coldest part of the season.”

“At that time my dad had already been dead for several years. I lived there alone. Whenever I got bored, I’d stand by the window and melt the frost patterns on the glass with my hands so I could look outside.”

Zhou Ruo An imagined the scenery outside the window—a patch of reeds, nothing worth seeing. Lin Yi’s home sat at the deepest end of the alley beside stagnant water that smelled fishy in summer and was battered by freezing winds and snow in winter. Even within the urban village, houses were divided into ranks, and Lin Yi’s was the very lowest.

“Usually there wasn’t anything interesting outside that window,” Lin Yi continued. “But that day, several kids were playing on the frozen reed pond. They were hiding in the dry reeds with only their heads sticking out.”

“And then you showed up.”

At those words, Zhou Ruo An suddenly twisted around. Memories long buried were struck open by those few simple sentences, cracking apart the thick shell of ice over them. He saw his younger self trudging through deep snow into the reeds, calling out again and again:

‘Mimi, Mimi.’

“Those kids were…”

“Abusing a cat,” Lin Yi finished for him. “Then you got into a nearly life-or-death fight with them. When you finally stumbled out of the reeds bruised and battered, that was when I saw the little orange cat you were holding.”

“I…” Zhou Ruo An settled back into Lin Yi’s embrace and stared into the pitch-black night beyond the window, speaking in a deliberately careless tone. “I’d taken a job from the blind old lady next door. Five yuan to help her find her cat. Once I take a job, I can’t leave it unfinished. If you flake on one deal, you’ll stay poor your whole life.”

The cigarette burned out. Lin Yi crushed the butt into the ashtray.

Then he tightened both arms around Zhou Ruo An and rested his chin on the other man’s shoulder.

“Even though we lived in the same area, I never really noticed you before. But after that, I kept seeing you. I watched you for years. Then you provoked the wrong people and came to me wanting to be my little brother, wanting me to protect you. That’s when we really got to know each other.”

“What little brother? We were friends.”

Lin Yi rubbed his chin against the skin at Zhou Ruo An’s neck and laughed softly.

“When you first wanted to follow me around, you were so obedient. You did whatever I told you. But once you realized I spoiled you, your backbone straightened right up. Eventually you even started bossing me around.” He paused. “Zhou Ruo An, you’re the best at reading the situation and adapting to it, but… you’re actually very kind.”

Zhou Ruo An stared blankly for a moment before exploding in anger.

“Lin Yi, are you insulting me on purpose?!”

Lin Yi laughed and began roaming his hands again, grabbing him below the waist and moving slowly.

“Zhou Ruo An, whether someone is beautiful depends on whose eyes are looking at them. I just think you’re beautiful. I only want to do this kind of thing with you.”

“Lin Yi…” Zhou Ruo An’s breathing became increasingly ragged. “I’m already exhausted, don’t…”

Before he could finish speaking, heat surged through his body as he was penetrated again.

Zhou Ruo An threw his head back and gasped sharply. After enduring the worst of it, he gritted his teeth and said:

“Lin Yi, are you trying to play me to death over these three days?”

Lin Yi gripped his neck and tilted his head back before kissing him.

“I won’t play you to death,” he murmured deeply into Zhou Ruo An’s mouth. “Young Master Zhou has a very good body.”

Time became thick and sticky with desire, losing all meaning as something that could still be measured.

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