Futile Devices Scans

After the rain, the sky cleared.

The brilliant red sunset glow dyed the entire mountain city. Even the stone-paved lanes in the alleys were stained a soft orange, so that every step felt like walking through warm light.

Urgent knocking came from outside the little courtyard.

Brother-in-law had just finished clearing the accumulated mud inside and outside the courtyard, and was sitting on a small stool, sewing new shoe soles for the soldiers defending the city. Hearing the sound, he put down his needle and thread. “Coming, coming! Wife! Third Brother is back!”

Elder Sister Zhang was bent over by the stove, lighting the fire. Hearing this, she straightened as well. She saw her husband joyfully open the courtyard gate, and immediately afterward came a miserable scream. “Gh-ghost! A ghost! Wife, save me!”

Elder Sister Zhang grabbed the kitchen knife and strode out, just in time to see two great black ghosts covered head to toe in mud squeeze in from outside the courtyard, one on the left and one on the right, supporting Brother-in-law, whose legs had gone weak from fright.

“Sis!” said the black ghost who showed his tiger teeth when he smiled. “Look who’s back!”

The other black ghost bared a neat row of small white teeth and called clearly, “Sis!”

Elder Sister Zhang said happily, “Fourth! How did you come back?”

She put down the kitchen knife and went forward joyfully, first taking her cowardly husband and setting him aside on the small stool. Then she quickly took hold of Li Si and gestured for him to lower his head, first picking bits of mud from his hair.

“How did you get yourself so dirty! Sit down quickly. I’ll bring water and wipe your face!”

Zhang San said, “I’ll wipe it for him. Sis, hurry and use these pigeon eggs to make steamed cakes! This greedy little imp has been craving them the whole way back!”

Elder Sister Zhang slapped him across the head. “Who are you calling a greedy little imp? You’re the great greedy imp! Were those tooth marks on Fourth’s face chewed by you? Always bullying him just because he’s honest!”

Zhang San clutched his head, indignant. Honest, my ass! His own mouth had been gnawed open by Fourth! The little fool had learned by example, and had sucked his tongue swollen!

The whole family got busy. Elder Sister went to cook the pigeon eggs, and Brother-in-law went to pick cabbage. Zhang San fetched a basin of water to wash his own face and Sisi’s.

The little fool’s face was covered in black mud, and he cupped water in his hands and splashed it a few times himself. Zhang San then took a cloth towel and carefully wiped him clean.

As he wiped, Zhang San frowned—why was he still so dark even after being wiped clean? Where had his fair, clean little immortal gone?

Li Si had spent every day under the blazing sun helping Pacification Commissioner Li train troops, and he had not worn a face covering either, so his little pale face had long been tanned into a little dark face. Zhang San pulled open his collar and looked at his chest—fortunately, his body was still pale.

“How did you get tanned into two different colors!” he said, distressed, then felt Li Si up and down. “But you have gotten a lot sturdier. Was the food in the capital good?”

Li Si nodded. “The Imperial City Directorate had meat to eat every day. Sometimes Little Brother would even have young eunuchs bring me sweet fruits.”

Zhang San asked, “Is Little Brother doing well? Did he become a high official?”

Thinking of Little Brother’s deathly pale complexion and the countless scars on his body, Li Si lowered his eyes. “No.”

Zhang San asked a few more questions about why he was not well, then cursed under his breath, “A demon priest paired with a dog!”

A dog of an Emperor who could hand over three major towns with both hands could naturally support such a monstrous evil. It was not surprising.

He then said in a low voice, “Don’t tell Elder Sister and Brother-in-law. It’ll only make them sad.”

Li Si did not quite understand, but obediently nodded. Then he said, “Little Brother became Duke Protector of the State. He said not to worry. He has his own plans.”

Zhang San sighed. “He’s bold and clever. He’s someone with ideas of his own.”

⸻

Brother-in-law picked a cabbage they had grown themselves from the back courtyard, and Elder Sister had Zhang San go chop the vegetables. Brother-in-law had nothing to do, so he took the cloth towel and wanted to continue helping Li Si wipe the mud from his hair.

Zhang San did not even look at the chopping board. While chopping with bang, bang, bang sounds, he stuck his head out and said, “Brother-in-law, don’t wipe anymore. After dinner, I’ll take him to bathe.”

Brother-in-law stopped, but unable to find anything else to do, he picked up the needle, thread and shoe sole again, then continued sewing. As he sewed, he chattered with Li Si, asking whether Grandma was well, and then listening as Li Si spoke of the godmother he had newly acknowledged.

Zhang San still did not look at the chopping board. As his hand rose and the knife fell, he stared fixedly at Sisi. Sisi was sitting on a small stool, helping Brother-in-law thread a needle, his dirty, messy little head tilted up, his eyes wide open as he pinched the thread and earnestly searched for the eye of the needle, like a newly married bride who had just entered the household and was learning needlework.

Elder Sister was kneading dough off to the side. She jabbed Zhang San with the rolling pin. “What are you grinning stupidly for! Watch the knife! Don’t chop your hand!”

Zhang San reluctantly withdrew his gaze, then heard Elder Sister ask in a low voice, “How did he come back? Did you trick him into coming back?”

Zhang San hurriedly shook his head, but then, thinking of how Sisi had cried and called him a “big liar” while gnawing at his mouth just now, he grinned foolishly and nodded.

Seeing that he was beyond saving, Elder Sister also smiled. “Happy?”

Zhang San grinned foolishly and nodded again. “Happy.” He lowered his head and gathered the chopped cabbage together. After a while, he added, “But he shouldn’t have come back. It’s dangerous here.”

Elder Sister said, “Then trick him into leaving again.”

Zhang San’s movements froze. Only after a long time did he say, “Can’t bear to.”

He mixed the cabbage with the eggs Elder Sister had fried, and as he worked, he said, “He brought the court’s reinforcements with him. Somehow, the court finally saw sense again and is willing to aid Kuiyuan once more. Sis, this time, maybe we can drive the Xiao bandits back.”

His movements paused again, and he said firmly, “We will definitely drive the Xiao bandits back.”

Elder Sister smiled and gave him a fierce slap on the back, making his tiger body jolt. “You’ve got spirit now! Not bad!”

–

The family happily ate a meal of steamed cakes, talking about Grandma and Godmother, and then about Little Brother Qiao Shen. Li Si watched Brother Xiao’s expression and hid the matter of Qiao Shen’s injuries, saying only that Little Brother had become Duke Protector of the State, moved into the imperial palace, and had meat to eat every day, with sweet fruits and new clothes. Hearing this, Elder Sister and Brother-in-law were even happier.

After dinner, the two of them said goodbye to Elder Sister and Brother-in-law, then walked hand in hand along the stone-paved lane.

As Li Si walked, he seemed to be thinking about something. He tilted his head and said nothing. Zhang San therefore squeezed his soft palm and asked, “What’s wrong?”

Li Si had not thought it through, so he said honestly, “Little Brother is not doing well. We shouldn’t have lied to Elder Sister and Brother-in-law. But they were so happy just now.”

Zhang San raised his other hand and pinched his soft earlobe. “Little fool, sometimes lying isn’t a bad thing.”

Li Si thought it over for a while, then turned his face back and said seriously, “You’re not allowed to lie to me again. When you lie to me, it’s a bad thing.”

Zhang San said shamelessly, “Who can say that for sure? Your Brother Xiao is bad through and through… Ow! It hurts! Gently, it’s already split… mmh…”

Li Si pressed him beneath the eaves by the roadside and, in a huff, gnawed at his mouth for a good while longer, gnawing until both of them were panting.

At the end, Instructor Zhang was in a sorry state, covering his mouth and dodging again and again, refusing to let him kiss anymore. When he opened his palm, it was full of bloody foam.

“You don’t have to bite this hard every time!” he sighed. “Blame me for not teaching you properly. I’ll teach you again tomorrow.”

Li Si tilted his head and looked at him blankly, truly thinking that biting until bloody foam appeared and sucking until the tongue hurt was what “affection” meant. Wasn’t it? Then was leaving tooth marks on the face what it meant?

“Hey! My face is dirty! Stop blindly learning everything!”

–

Instructor Zhang, with his mouth swollen and a fresh row of tooth marks on his face, led his diligent and earnest good student by the hand and walked through the lane in resentment.

He had originally intended to take Li Si back to the county yamen to bathe, but after being gnawed until his blood was boiling all over, waves of panic rose in his heart… as though he needed to do something more.

Do not look at his tiger-headed, tiger-brained appearance; in truth, he was a tiger instructor made of paper. He was only a few years older than Li Si, and had followed the army everywhere for years. Although he had heard of affairs between men in the army and had even secretly seen other soldiers gnawing at each other’s mouths, he had never personally seen that sort of thing.

Occasionally, when he had needs, he would take care of it himself at random. In the barracks, everyone slept on one big communal bed, and he could not do this and that beside his comrades, so he either hid away and dealt with it once, or simply endured it and let it pass. In any case, the next day, he would go into battle and kill the enemy, hacking wildly, and vent it all out.

In his heart, he wanted to do something more with Sisi, but he did not know how two people were supposed to do something more. Now his heart itched, his hands itched too, and he urgently needed a bout of wild hacking to vent a little.

The two walked hand in hand for a while longer. He endured until it became unbearable, and at last could not help opening his mouth to ask, “You’ve been traveling for two days. Are you tired?”

Li Si shook his head. “Not tired.”

Knowing that Li Si had good stamina, Zhang San said, “You came back just in time. Come with me down the mountain to take a bath and kill a bandit.”

Li Si said, “Eh?”

–

Zhang San had tried to kill that western camp commander three rounds by himself. His arrow had missed, the thunder bomb had failed to blow him up, and the fire had failed to burn him. It was damned strange. Now that Sisi had come, he was like a fierce tiger with horse wings, and decided to strike while the iron was hot, chop off that bandit leader, and not leave him alive to waste tomorrow’s grain.

He dared to mess around blindly, and Li Si dared to follow him blindly. These two hot-blooded young men with nowhere to vent actually went to bathe and kill a bandit under the cover of a dark, windy night.

Zhang San carried the wide-bladed single saber Wang Xu had given him—the blacksmith had repaired it long ago. Li Si carried his bow and arrows on his back, with the Tang hengdao at his waist and his shriveled bundle slung over his shoulder, and they went straight to the drill ground.

Zhang San gave a few instructions to the soldiers guarding the dried-up well, entrusted Li Si’s bundle to one of them to take to the county yamen, and took two torches before leading Li Si down along the familiar well shaft.

Though many days had passed since the earthen fortress exploded, there was still the smell of smoke and gunpowder in the well shaft. But before they had gone far, several forked paths appeared by the roadside—one of them was old, leading in the direction of the earthen fortress, and the ground was already covered in layers of smoke and dust.

The other paths, however, Li Si had never seen before.

He curiously felt around everywhere and heard Brother Xiao showing off ahead of him. “Hehe! If ancient people could dig, why can’t I? I’ve already dug this mountain through! Hurry and keep up!”

He followed Brother Xiao through the tunnel, turning this way and that, faintly aware that they were descending the whole time. Along the way, they encountered several more forked paths. If Brother Xiao had not been leading the way ahead, he would certainly have gotten lost inside.

–

After walking through the dimness for who knew how long, they gradually felt the fine mountain wind, and the air grew fresher and fresher.

Zhang San pushed open a wooden board at the end of the small path. The outside of the board was covered with dead branches and dry grass used as concealment.

The cool night wind rushed against their faces, and the moon was perfectly round. Zhang San stuck his head out and looked outside, then turned back and smiled. “The road hasn’t been cut off. We can go.”

His smile was bright, and the moonlight made his already generous, untamed features even sharper and more distinct, with the tiny tips of his tiger teeth faintly showing.

Li Si’s breathing became unsteady in the night wind, and his heartbeat quickened too. For some reason, he suddenly very much wanted to go and “show affection” to him again, to lick those two pointed little tiger teeth.

“What are you standing there for? Come with me.”

–

The two left the passage, and Zhang San carefully turned back to cover the wooden board door again.

This cave entrance was located above the original earthen fortress, on a steep slope halfway up the mountain. Some inconspicuous grooves had been cleverly carved into the slope, forming a hidden stretch of stone steps.

The stone steps led downward all the way and had originally connected to the rear courtyard of the earthen fortress, but after no more than ten or so steps, they were buried by stones from the landslide. The earthen fortress had also collapsed beyond recognition.

Zhang San, who was walking ahead, held out his hand to Li Si. The two supported each other as they stepped down across the broken stones. The more Li Si saw the collapsed and desolate state of the earthen fortress, the more alarmed he became. “Brother Xiao, what happened to the earthen fortress? Was it smashed by the Xiao bandits?”

He still naively thought that using a stone-throwing machine and battering cart could smash the earthen fortress into this state.

Zhang San coughed unnaturally. “Ahem. I blew it up.”

“Eh?”

“Ahem. Blew up five or six hundred Xiao bandits…”

Li Si did not speak for quite a while. Zhang San guiltily did not dare turn back to look at him.

Only then did Li Si ask again, “Will the two Brothers Zhou be sad?” He knew that before he left, the fortress residents had all moved into Ant County. Only Zhou Qi and Zhou Ba had stayed behind in the earthen fortress with the soldiers to keep watch, truly treating the earthen fortress as their home.

He had truly hit the mark. Zhang San coughed. “Didn’t I build the two of them a new sentry tower? Right where we kissed.”

“What is kissed… Oh!”

–

Li Si learned a new word, and his nostalgia for the earthen fortress was suppressed. So when “showing affection,” it was not biting mouths, but kissing mouths. No wonder Brother Xiao said that not every time had to involve biting.

Kissing sounded fragrant and soft, like sweet fruit.

Li Si became happy and tightly held Zhang San’s hand again. Zhang San did not know how he had so quickly coaxed himself happy again, but since he was happy, then he happily held his hand.

–

Before long, the two descended to the original ground level of the earthen fortress. A few months ago, everyone had roasted mole crickets here and sat together chatting idly.

Now the bricks and stones here had collapsed in all directions, and there were quite a few sunken places in the ground as well. From time to time, piled-up fallen rocks blocked the path ahead.

The two climbed over the stone piles. Under the moonlight, Li Si spotted several broken wooden frames and suddenly asked nervously, “Where is General Sun’s horse?”

No matter how much Zhang San ruined things, he would not dare ruin this thousand-li divine steed. “Don’t worry. We’ll see it in a while. I was just thinking of bringing it back into the city.”

The two left the earthen fortress and climbed over the Seven-Star Formation, which had been smashed into a chaotic mess by the Xiao army, finally reaching the riverbank.

Downstream on the opposite bank was the Xiao camp at this time. Only several hundred soldiers remained, and from afar, the camp looked sparse and desolate. A lone commander’s banner hung listlessly beneath the moonlight.

There were Xiao soldiers keeping night watch, but they were only stationed downstream, beside the newly built wooden bridge near the official road up the mountain, watching the mountain path fixedly.

–

There was a great distance between the two sides, and it was very safe in the night. Zhang San casually tossed aside his saber, took off his shoes and socks, and stepped into the water.

The cool river water of the summer night kissed his ankles all at once, so comfortable that his whole body shivered. The evil fire that had been burning in his heart for so long was finally pressed down.

The light sound of water being stepped through came from behind him. Li Si had also put down his weapons, taken off his shoes and socks, and entered the water. He walked forward a few steps, then swiftly submerged his whole body into the water. It had been a very long time since he had bathed in a river, and he was extremely happy. With one dip of his head, he was like a swimming dragon flicking its tail, sliding far away in the blink of an eye.

Zhang San chased a few steps and also submerged half his body in the water, saying in a low shout, “Don’t swim too far.”

How did this little thing know both how to fly and how to swim! Flat ground, mountains, ice, underwater—there was no place where he could not glide!

Li Si obediently swam back again, poked his head out of the water, and shook it hard. His already loose hair knot fell apart, and his long black hair draped over his shoulders. Even his eyelashes were hung with fine water droplets, making him look even more like a little water ghost who hooked people’s souls.

Zhang San only looked at him once before the evil fire was hooked back to life. He cursed under his breath, then buried himself downward and hid in the water as well…

–

Li Si lowered his eyes and earnestly scrubbed his hair, then took off his thin upper garment and carefully washed the mud from his body as well, rubbing his clothes clean too. After tidying himself up, he looked up and around, and suddenly realized Brother Xiao was gone.

He turned back and glanced in the direction of the Xiao army camp. After confirming that it was very safe, he called softly, “Brother Xiao?”

The water surface was completely calm, and the moonlight was mottled like golden fish scales.

No one responded to him for a long time.

Li Si grew a little anxious. He swam around in a panic a few times, then called softly again, “Brother Xiao?”

“Brother Xiao!”

With a soft splash, half a figure emerged far away on the opposite bank—Brother Xiao had somehow swum so far away! Just now, he had even told him “don’t swim too far”!

Brother Xiao waved at him from the opposite bank and made a gesture. Li Si then slung both of their sabers over himself, tied both pairs of shoes and socks at his waist, lifted the bow case and arrow quiver that could not get wet onto the top of his head, and swam silently over to find him.

–

When he reached the bank and looked, Brother Xiao had taken off his upper garment as well and was sitting bare-chested on a rock, his hair loose. For some reason, his face was frighteningly red, and his breathing was hurried and burning hot.

Li Si thought he had caught a chill from soaking in the cold water and developed a fever, so he reached out to touch his forehead—sure enough, it was somewhat warm.

But Zhang San leaned back as if startled, avoiding his hand, then hurriedly sprang up and dodged far away.

He flusteredly tugged at his dripping-wet trousers, his whole face bright red as he urged, “What are you touching randomly for! Hurry, let’s go!”

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