Xue Bao Tian sat in front of the arcade machine, smoking sullenly. There were cigarette butts of varying lengths scattered around his feet, drawing several eye-rolls from the elderly woman cleaning the place.
Subconsciously, he reached through his clothes to touch the spot beneath his collarbone. Staring at the smoke slowly rising from between his fingers, he once again thought of the cigarette that had scorched his skin the night before, held in Yan Ye’s hand and pressed against him in a way that was unsettling as hell.
The windows of the stilt house did not close properly, and a gust of cold wind slipped in through the gaps.
Xue Bao Tian shivered and pressed his back tightly against the wall. “Brother Chi, I never properly apologized for that cigarette burn, did I?” He slapped his forehead as if struck by sudden remorse. “Look at me, so damn forgetful. I actually forgot something that important. Let me formally apologize now. It was my fault for fooling around and not knowing my limits. When we get home, I’ll treat you to a banquet as an apology.”
The moonlight that had been bright moments ago was swallowed by drifting clouds. The shadow on the wall dimmed, and Yan Ye’s expression became increasingly unreadable in the darkness. Only the white smoke rising from the cigarette remained clearly visible, drifting slowly upward against the deep shadows.
The smoke stung Xue Bao Tian’s eyes, leaving a thin layer of moisture in them. He deliberately squeezed out a few more tears, putting on an expression of sincere regret and apology.
The night was too dark. Yan Ye either did not see it, or saw it and remained unmoved.
Holding the cigarette between his fingers, Yan Ye moved a little closer. His voice still revealed neither anger nor amusement. “How could Master Xue forget? Don’t you always take a few extra looks whenever we end up in bed?” He pressed a hand down on Xue Bao Tian as he tried to lean away. “Don’t move. If I miss the spot, should I try again?”
Xue Bao Tian had extinguished cigarettes with his fingertips before. It hurt, but it had always been within the limits of what he could tolerate. Yet now, with the dull ember hovering over the tender lamb-like skin beneath his collarbone, he could no longer remain indifferent. Every nerve in his body tightened as he waited for the sharp pain that might strike at any moment.
He had known Yan Ye for nearly a year. Their contact had been intermittent at first, but recently they had been living together and sharing a bed. By now, he understood Yan Ye well enough. Gritting his teeth, he suddenly grabbed Yan Ye’s wrist.
He stopped shrinking away, though he was not being especially arrogant either. For once, he was actually trying to reason with him. “Brother Chi, that burn mark may have been caused by me, but if you think back to the situation, you brought it on yourself too. Still, if you want payback, Master Xue won’t back down. Burn me if you want.”
Leaning forward slightly, he pressed toward the glowing ember. “It’s just a scar. I’m a grown man. What the hell do I have to be afraid of? Worst case, I stop wearing low-collared shirts.”
When Xue Bao Tian kept his foul mouth shut, he could actually be considered sexy. His neck was beautiful, whether lowered or tilted back, effortlessly drawing the eye.
Yan Ye liked seeing him in low-collared clothes—oversized loungewear, loose knit sweaters. Sitting on the floor drinking beer, bathed in sunlight, he looked like a picture of peaceful contentment, as long as he stayed quiet.
Yan Ye was always kissing and nuzzling at his collarbones and the hollow of his throat. Xue Bao Tian simply did not believe the man could bring himself to leave a scar there.
He leaned closer again.
Sure enough, the cigarette retreated half an inch.
Secretly pleased with himself, Xue Bao Tian moved even closer, completely unconcerned.
“Brother Chi,” he said, knowing exactly how to coax Yan Ye, “how about Master Xue gives you a kiss as an apology?”
Soft lips settled over the old scar. He kissed it again and again before gently brushing over it with the tip of his tongue.
Yan Ye lowered his eyes to look at him. After a long while, he finally extinguished the cigarette. The self-mocking loneliness in his gaze gradually cleared away. Reaching out, he ruffled the hair beneath his palm and said softly, “I was joking, Master Xue. It’s late. Go to sleep.”
With one casual sentence, Yan Ye let the matter go.
Ordinarily, Xue Bao Tian would have dug three feet into the ground and buried him for trying something like that. But tonight, he did not dare make a scene. He obediently let himself be held, closed his eyes, and spent the night restlessly turning things over in his mind.
In the deeper hours of the night, even the moon refused to show itself. Yan Ye’s steady breathing was close at hand. Turning onto his side with his back to Yan Ye, Xue Bao Tian unlocked his phone. In the narrow glow of the screen, confusion filled his face as he hesitantly searched: Why does a straight man feel pleasure when forced to sleep with another man?
“Fuck! Closeted gay? Get the hell out of here!” he cursed, then hurriedly looked over at Yan Ye. Seeing that he was still asleep, he let out a long breath of relief and changed the search terms: It’s normal for a straight man to feel good sleeping with another man, right?
His eyes skimmed over the dense blocks of text. Hidden beneath the blanket, Xue Bao Tian muttered, “Were these answers written with a damn 2B pencil?”
Keeping his voice down while cursing was exhausting as hell. By the time he threw off the blanket, he was practically panting. He sat there lost in thought for a while. Confusion shifted into bewilderment, and then, as though determined to prove something, he dug out a porn film he had saved long ago.
Beautiful figures, spectacular curves, surging waves of flesh.
Yet Xue Bao Tian only found himself growing more anxious.
In the dead silence of the night, the bamboo bed suddenly creaked. Yan Ye turned over, presenting his back to Xue Bao Tian.
Guiltily putting away his phone, Xue Bao Tian pinched himself hard and muttered under his breath, “What the hell is wrong with me?”
The cigarette burned down to the filter and scorched his fingers. Lately, Xue Bao Tian had become unusually sensitive to that kind of heat. Snapping back to himself, he cursed.
Throwing away the cigarette, he heard someone ask, “Handsome, you’ve been playing this game for days now. Is it really that fun?”
The heavily accented Mandarin sounded soft and coquettish. Turning his head, Xue Bao Tian saw a young woman standing beside the arcade machine in an extremely flirtatious pose.
“Handsome, where are you from? I’ve never seen you around here before.”
The question immediately put him on guard. Smiling back at her, he adopted the lazy air of a rich young master. “Got tired of the big city. Came here to stay for a while.”
“I get it,” the girl said with a smile. “Taking a vacation for your mood.”
She slowly leaned over the arcade machine, pulled out a phone covered in sparkling rhinestones, and held it in front of him. Raising her finely shaped brows, she said, “Add me on WeChat. If you get lonely, we can hook up.”
Xue Bao Tian froze. His fingers curled tightly at once. Instinctively, he glanced across the street at Yan Ye. Seeing that the man was still sitting with his back toward him, playing chess with someone, he slowly let out a breath.
“Not adding me?” After waiting for a while, the girl looked annoyed. “Forget it then.”
“…”
Xue Bao Tian remained silent for another moment. Just before she put her phone away, he suddenly stopped her.
“I’ll add you.”
The inn door swung open, and a young woman came storming out looking displeased. A glance to the side startled her. In clumsy Mandarin, she asked, “Handsome, why are you squatting here? I’ve been waiting inside for ages. I thought you weren’t coming.”
Xue Bao Tian pushed himself upright from where he had been crouching against the wall. Cursing himself under his breath, he thought: since when had the Crown Prince of Ruixiang, a man who once wandered through countless flowers without getting stuck on any of them, become so timid about arranging a hookup?
Relaxing his shoulders and hips in an attempt to appear carefree, he said, “Just stayed here to smoke a cigarette. Come on, let’s go inside.”
The inn door slowly closed, separating the noisy bustle of the outside world from the ambiguous entanglements within, as though dividing them into two entirely different worlds…
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