When Xie Jia Hua returned that evening, Lu Guang Ming asked him about the little shark. To his surprise, Xie Jia Hua said he had bought it for him.
Lu Guang Ming was astonished. Before he had shamelessly wormed his way into the Xie household for the second time, Xie Jia Hua had already bought that little shark as a gift for him. Back when Xie Jia Hua still spoke to him coldly and their relationship remained hostile and tense, he had eaten the breakfast Lu Guang Ming brought him, then washed the lunch box and kept it.
Perhaps—just perhaps—before Xie Jia Hua himself had even realized it, he had already developed the faintest trace of affection for him. Lu Guang Ming did not dare imagine that tiny bit of affection was love. Perhaps it was sympathy; perhaps it was pity. But that was already enough. He was perfectly content.
Clutching the little shark, he gleefully went to seduce Xie Jia Hua, who was still in the shower. Xie Jia Hua said the little shark was “for coaxing children,” then finally lost patience beneath Lu Guang Ming’s teasing, pinned him against the bathroom wall, and had him right there.
Amid the warm stream of water, Lu Guang Ming was surrounded by a warm embrace and entered slowly and gently. He turned his head to seek a kiss, and Xie Jia Hua responded tenderly. They nuzzled intimately, like a pair of ardent lovers. The tide of desire surging through his body rose and fell to the same rhythm, slowly submerging him like waves of the sea, like a little shark stranded onshore finally returning to the ocean. The patter of water mingled with their rising and falling breaths. He gripped the little shark tightly, its tiny pointed teeth pricking faintly into his palm. His other hand clawed helplessly at the wall until Xie Jia Hua’s palm covered it from behind and their fingers intertwined.
They fooled around for the entire night. Xie Jia Hua’s endurance and passion always gave him the illusion of being loved. Lu Guang Ming willingly let himself sink into that illusion, clinging tightly to Xie Jia Hua and refusing to let go even when the repeated thrusts nearly left him unable to breathe.
Even while sleeping, he wrapped all four limbs around Xie Jia Hua, practically climbing on top of him. “Are you trying to crush me to death?” Xie Jia Hua asked with a frown.
Lu Guang Ming immediately released him, turned his back pitifully, and curled into a ball. Xie Jia Hua pinched his ass. “Stop pretending. Come here.”
Lu Guang Ming burrowed back into Xie Jia Hua’s arms. Xie Jia Hua closed an arm around him and patted his waist. “Go to sleep. Stop bothering me. I still have work tomorrow.”
I’ll never bother you again after this, Lu Guang Ming thought, secretly kissing Xie Jia Hua’s shoulder.
The next morning, he tried to sneak away with the little shark but was caught by Xie Jia Hua in the act. Guessing that Lu Guang Ming was about to undertake a dangerous mission, Xie Jia Hua hung the spirit tablet of Tang Jia Qi, which he always carried with him, around Lu Guang Ming’s neck. Lu Guang Ming clutched the tablet and fled as quickly as he could, afraid he would be unable to resist kissing Xie Jia Hua.
They had never kissed except when they were having sex. He did not dare—and could not—take that step.
What followed happened so quickly that it felt like a dream, yet it was a blood-soaked nightmare. Lu Guang Ming and He Chu San exhausted every possible means, seized Xie Ying Jie’s weak point, obtained conclusive evidence, and devised a plan that drew out the enormous sum of money Xie Ying Jie had accumulated through corruption over the years. Chief Investigator Xu led the entire branch Operations Group—more than forty people in six vehicles—to strike simultaneously, splitting up to arrest Xie Ying Jie, his underworld proxy, and Qiao Chun An, one of his principal bribers. Yet no one had expected that, driven into a dead end, Xie Ying Jie would lose all reason and murder every member of the operation in an attempt to destroy all witnesses and evidence. That vicious, treacherous bastard Xie Ying Jie killed Chief Investigator Xu before Lu Guang Ming’s eyes and burned the bodies of his colleagues. He spared only Lu Guang Ming and He Chu San, viciously beat them, then locked them inside a freezer and tried to freeze them to death.
He Chu San was gravely injured, and his throat had been badly scalded. His consciousness began fading before Lu Guang Ming’s. Lu Guang Ming stuffed his little shark into He Chu San’s hand because it was “for coaxing children,” trying to make a joke and encourage He Chu San to keep holding on. While comforting him, Lu Guang Ming struggled desperately to remain conscious, placing his hopes on Xie Jia Hua finding the evidence he had left behind. Perhaps they still had the faintest chance of survival.
Besides, Brother Jia Qi had also died inside a freezer. Lu Guang Ming was afraid to imagine Xie Jia Hua’s expression upon seeing his corpse. He knew Xie Jia Hua cared about him—he loved Jia Qi, but he cared about Lu Guang Ming too. Lu Guang Ming did not want to be frozen alive like Brother Jia Qi. How devastated would Xie Jia Hua be?
Amid the extreme cold, he strangely began to feel a scorching heat like fire. He had long heard that people freezing to death experienced an illusion of burning warmth shortly before dying. In his haze, he thought, Who was Brother Jia Qi thinking of in his final moments? Was it Xie Jia Hua? He risked his life to help uncover the truth about my father. He cared about me. Did he know I didn’t mean it when I told him to get lost? Did he think of me too? Could he forgive my stupidity and anger? I really want to apologize to him.
I really wish I could love Xie Jia Hua in his place.
But that was no longer possible…
Just as his final trace of consciousness and hope completely melted away, he heard a tremendous crash from what seemed like somewhere very far away. Blinding light scattered the darkness. His frost-covered eyelashes trembled, and within that warm radiance, he saw Xie Jia Hua.
Xie Jia Hua lunged forward and held him tightly, then quickly stripped off his clothes and wrapped them around Lu Guang Ming before lifting him entirely into his arms and carrying him out of the freezer. Shivering, Lu Guang Ming wrapped his arms around Xie Jia Hua’s neck. A hoarse whimper escaped his blue lips, gradually turning into ragged sobs.
With all his strength, he bit down on Xie Jia Hua’s shoulder. As his sense of smell gradually returned, he caught the scent of sweat and blood upon it. It was the finest smell in the entire world.
Xie Jia Hua placed him on a stretcher, and the medical staff quickly surrounded him. Lu Guang Ming clutched Xie Jia Hua’s hand and refused to let go. Xie Jia Hua followed beside the stretcher the entire way, gripping his hand in return, stroking his face, kissing his forehead, and speaking softly to him. “It’s all right now. It’s all right. You’re safe. I’m here.”
“…San…”
“What did you say? Speak slowly.”
“…A’San…”
“He Chu San? He’s in the ambulance beside us. He’s still alive. You don’t need to worry.”
“Xie… Ying Jie…”
“He’s been arrested. I arrested him myself. I saw the evidence you left behind. You did very well.”
“You… don’t blame… me? He’s your… dad…”
A trace of bitterness appeared in Xie Jia Hua’s eyes, along with boundless tenderness. Ignoring the medical staff around them, he lowered his head and kissed Lu Guang Ming on the lips. “Silly boy. Rest properly. I’ll stay here with you.”
The moment they entered the hospital, the two were separated. Each was rushed away for emergency treatment and examinations. Lu Guang Ming obediently cooperated with the treatment and soon fell asleep under the sedative effects of the medication. When he woke, he heard that the normally composed He Chu San had instead caused an uproar at the hospital, refusing to enter the operating room even if it killed him unless he saw Xia Liu Yi. Xie Jia Hua had no choice but to apply to his superiors to have the already-detained Xia Liu Yi transferred to the hospital to accompany him.
Three days later, Lu Guang Ming was moved out of the sterile ward. Holding a hand over his chest, Xie Jia Hua slowly entered Lu Guang Ming’s room with the support of a middle-aged caregiver.
One of Lu Guang Ming’s injured legs was wrapped like a mummy and suspended outside the quilt. He leaned against the headboard, staring absently out the window. Hearing Xie Jia Hua enter, he turned his head and smiled. The smile was gentle, but his gaze was somewhat vacant, as though all his former cleverness and mischief had disappeared.
“Are you all right?” “Are your injuries serious?” they asked at the same time.
Lu Guang Ming smiled awkwardly again. “Sorry. You speak first.”
“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Xie Jia Hua said. “Two cracked ribs. It’s nothing.”
“Thank you for coming to save us that day,” Lu Guang Ming said.
Xie Jia Hua sat in the chair beside his bed and told the caregiver to go take a walk. Only after the man had left did he ask gently, “Is there nothing else you want to say to me?”
“I…” Lu Guang Ming lowered his eyes. After remaining silent for a while, he said, “Can I ask you something? None of them are willing to tell me. They won’t even let me watch television. I know they mean well.”
“What is it?”
“The ICAC… exactly how many people did we lose?”
Xie Jia Hua looked into his eyes. “This wasn’t your fault.”
“Please tell me. I’m begging you.”
Xie Jia Hua hesitated. Lu Guang Ming’s dark, unfathomable eyes watched him with such anxious earnestness that he finally sighed. “Forty-six. Xie Ying Jie sent people to attack all six vehicles. They also attacked your branch office and burned the entire office to destroy the records.”
Lu Guang Ming suddenly clenched the quilt, the veins on the back of his hand instantly bulging. Xie Jia Hua took his hand and gently but firmly opened his fingers one by one. “This wasn’t your fault.”
Lu Guang Ming lowered his head deeply. “An operation this large should have been reported to the ICAC Commissioner for approval, assignment, and command. I was impatient. I urged Chief Investigator Xu to act as quickly as possible.” His voice caught in a sob. “It was all because of me…”
“Listen to me,” Xie Jia Hua interrupted. “They were killed by Xie Ying Jie, not by you. If you hadn’t acted when you did, Xie Ying Jie would have taken the money and fled the country the next day, somewhere with no extradition treaty. You never would have gotten him back. Your operation was necessary. No one could have anticipated that Xie Ying Jie would become so utterly deranged!”
Lu Guang Ming stifled the sound of his crying and released a long, trembling breath. Yet tears still fell silently onto the quilt, one drop after another.
“Lu Guang Ming…” Xie Jia Hua said in anguish.
“I’m all right.” Lu Guang Ming did not raise his head. “I’m all right. Thank you for telling me. Thank you. I want… I want to rest for a while. Can you let me be alone?”
Xie Jia Hua hesitated, not daring to move.
Lu Guang Ming sniffled and continued, “Don’t worry. I won’t do anything foolish or hurt myself. Everyone else was killed, and I’m the only one who knows the details of many of the branch office’s cases. I still need to report everything and coordinate with our superiors.”
Xie Jia Hua had never seen him look so rational and composed. Those words caused Xie Jia Hua just as much pain. But since Lu Guang Ming had already asked him to leave, Xie Jia Hua no longer had any reason to remain. He could only brace himself against the bed and stand. He had taken only one step when Lu Guang Ming suddenly asked behind him, “Did they suspect you?”
“Suspect me of what?”
“The things Xie Ying Jie did over all these years. Did they suspect you were involved? Did anyone question you?”
“They questioned me. But it’s all right. After all, I was the one who arrested him.”
“Mm. That’s good. If anyone suspects you, tell me. I have all the material from when I investigated you before. You’re a good police officer. You’ve never put a foot wrong. I can prove it for you.”
Xie Jia Hua nodded, then slowly walked out while holding his chest. After gently closing the door, he silently sat cross-legged on the floor directly outside the hospital room. When the caregiver returned from his walk, he looked extremely surprised. Xie Jia Hua raised a finger to his lips, then silently mouthed, “I’ll keep him company.”
Inside the room, Lu Guang Ming lay on his back, completely unaware that Xie Jia Hua was there. Pulling the quilt over his head, he slowly curled himself into a ball within the darkness.