CD – Chapter 37: I Also Want to Be With You

The large bed let out an ambiguous creak. Xia Liu Yi straddled He Chu San, yanking roughly at his hair as he devoured his lips with urgency—his ferocity bordering on ravenous.

—On this very day, he had doubted He Chu San, had him under surveillance. If, at that time, he had truly heard He Chu San betray him and his brothers, he could not even be certain whether murderous intent would have surged within him. And yet He Chu San, knowing nothing, loved him; knowing nothing, had turned this day into a grand occasion; knowing nothing, had prepared this warm little home for him. This clean, upright university student of a prestigious school, with a promising future, was willing—for him—to defy principles and bottom lines, to cast aside conscience and morality, to fear neither danger nor the uncertainty of their future.

Guilt, sorrow, regret, lingering fear—these tangled and contradictory emotions flooded his heart, leaving him at a loss. He could only instinctively express them in this fierce, desperate way—release them! This damned bastard, this bastard who always wrenched at his heart!

The intensity left He Chu San breathless. The thunderous roar of his heartbeat echoed in his ears like a rushing train. Cradling the back of Xia Liu Yi’s head, he fumbled to soothe him.

He had long anticipated Xia Liu Yi’s reaction upon seeing the poster—yet the man’s response was far more intense than he had imagined. It made his chest ache with a strange panic.

At this moment, his heart was filled with both lingering fear and relief. He had indeed planted a listening device in Cui Dong Dong’s phone—but had never used it, nor had he made that call to betray Big Scarhead.

He had indeed planned to start with Big Scarhead, to dismantle the underground business of the Xiao Qi Hall step by step, leaving Xia Liu Yi no path but to launder his affairs and turn legitimate. Cui Dong Dong was cunning, Xiao Ma adept at concealment—both difficult to catch—but Big Scarhead was simple-minded, lacking vigilance. Yet at the very final moment, he had hesitated.

What he had told Sir Xie had been the truth of his heart. He had his scruples—he feared Xia Liu Yi would hate him, would never forgive him. This man, who seemed cold and powerful, wrapped in an unyielding shell, possessed only a sensitive, shattered heart. That heart had endured too much pain and sorrow; it could no longer withstand even the slightest betrayal or calculation. No matter his intentions, what he would receive in return would only be resentment and despair. Xia Liu Yi might very well leave him without looking back, sinking his soul completely into filth, beyond redemption.

The air in his chest grew thin. His cheeks flushed hot, breath ragged with the edge of suffocation—yet his hands cupped Xia Liu Yi’s face, pulling him closer, unwilling to let him go…

Only when he was on the verge of kissing him senseless did Xia Liu Yi snap out of his frenzy, breaking away with heavy breaths.

He Chu San curled up, coughing violently, gasping for air. Xia Liu Yi leaned in to check on him, but He Chu San suddenly shifted aside, avoiding his closeness.

Thinking he had frightened him, Xia Liu Yi let out a snort, pressing him down to steady his breathing. Yet as their bodies brushed, he felt the unmistakable hardness between He Chusan’s legs—and froze.

He Chu San curled in embarrassment, trying to hide his uncontrollable reaction. “Sorry… I’ll go to the bathroom.”

He turned to get off the bed, but Xia Liu Yi grabbed him.

Xia Liu Yi’s palm was cool, damp with sweat. He Chu San stood frozen, not daring to move. They remained in a silent standoff in the darkness. After a moment, Xia Liu Yi let out a soft sigh and tugged him back.

—Desire, like a spark, erupted into a wildfire.

By the time He Chu San came to his senses, he had already pressed Xia Liu Yi back onto the bed, their positions reversed. Now he was the one consumed by urgency and fervor. He rained kisses upon Xia Liu Yi’s brows and eyes, each one heavier than the last, each more ravenous than before. In the darkness, he tore open Xia Liu Yi’s clothes, inch by inch biting down from the trembling hollow of his throat to his sweat-damp collarbones.

His breathing trembled; his movements were hurried. He had dreamed countless times of this moment of skin against skin—in those dreams, he had always been gentle, lingering, tender. Yet in reality, his reason crumbled before Xia Liu Yi’s silent acceptance. His heart surged with both joy and pain, as though splitting apart; his soul burned within him. He could no longer control himself.

The belt made a clinking sound as it was pulled apart. He urgently pressed his own hard heat against Xia Liu Yi. When they were grasped together, Xia Liu Yi let out a sharp, pained gasp. As if recalling something, his entire musculature stiffened instantly, and goosebumps rapidly broke out on his arms.

He Chu San calmed down from the impulse and excitement. He caught Xia Liu Yi’s hand, brought it to his lips for a gentle kiss, and pressed the palm against his own burning face.

“Brother Liu Yi,” he called out softly against Xia Liu Yi’s ear, kissing the cold sweat on his forehead. “It’s me, it’s me…”

Xia Liu Yi clenched his hand into a tight fist, trembling as he struggled to steady his breathing. “Damn brat… hurry up…”

He Chu San, a virgin, began to move his hand rapidly, wrapping the scalding organs with sweat-slicked palms. The scorching temperature made their breaths frantic and disordered. Xia Liu Yi strained to lift his head to kiss him, saliva trickling from his mouth, merging with the sweat on his cheek.

As they engaged in their first physical intimacy, He Chu San’s orgasm came quickly amidst the madness and chaos. Dense white spots appeared in his vision, exploding like fireworks. Holding Xia Liu Yi’s lips, he let out a high-pitched sigh.

Panting, he stopped his hand, which was covered in sticky white turbidity. He lay prone on Xia Liu Yi to rest, only to realize that Xia Liu Yi had remained only semi-erect the whole time.

The corners of Xia Liu Yi’s mouth bore the redness and swelling from He Chu San’s earlier impulsive gnawing. Sensing He Chu San’s hesitation, he tugged at his hair and said nonchalantly, “It’s fine. I’m always like this. It’s not your problem.”

He Chu San had been to a red-light district and had long since guessed the reason behind his repulsion and resistance to sexual matters. Another wave of aching sorrow hit his heart. He lowered his head and kissed the corner of Xia Liu Yi’e lips softly. “Let’s go take a shower, okay?”

Under the warm spray of the shower, He Chu San kissed Xia Liu Yi with deliberate care, stripping away his soaked suit jacket, tie, shirt, and trousers one layer at a time. At last, he dropped to one knee.

The moment his mouth closed around him, Xia Liu Yi’s entire body shuddered. Instinctively, he grabbed the cold iron pipe on the wall, head tipping back as a hoarse sound broke from his throat.

“Damn brat… what are you doing…”

He Chu San quickly realized how sensitive he was. Even the lightest teasing—soft suction, fleeting kisses—drew sharp, uneven breaths from him. Water streamed down the taut lines of his abdomen; his skin burned hot, thighs trembling, every involuntary twitch sending droplets splashing against He Chu San’s forehead.

It wasn’t as though Xia Liu Yi had never experienced this before. More than ten years ago, after a victory feast, a group of senior brothers had dragged him off to “learn what it meant to be a man.” Because of his past, he had always recoiled from physical intimacy. But at the time, burdened by feelings he dared not acknowledge toward the Azure Dragon Boss, he hadn’t resisted much—only endured it in numb confusion.

They had shut him in a room with an experienced hostess. She had tried to please him for over ten minutes, yet he had felt nothing. Amused by his stiffness, she had teased him with kisses. In the end, he shoved her away, retched, and fled.

He remembered that sensation—wet, cloying, revolting.

Nothing like this.

Now, warmth wrapped around him, tentative yet earnest. The press of tongue and palate, the occasional graze of teeth—each touch sent a strange, tingling current through him. His lower abdomen tightened, legs weakening as heat surged downward. Gasping, he tangled his fingers in He Chu San’s hair, only to have his hand caught and held. Their fingers interlaced as that clumsy, persistent motion continued.

“Hn… mm… ngh…” Xia Liu Yi clenched his teeth, breath breaking unevenly through them, growing harsher beneath the steady rush of water. He was fully aroused, yet the peak refused to come. The teasing, intermittent pleasure only left him flushed and frustrated, chest heaving.

Abruptly, He Chu San pulled away.

Still panting, Xia Liu Yi barely registered the flash of blue from the shelf nearby, his thoughts too scattered to make sense of it. A faint scent drifted through the steam.

Then He Chu San returned, leaning in to kiss him.

Xia Liu Yi turned his head sharply. “Don’t kiss me after—mmph—what the hell are you—!”

The rest dissolved into a startled curse.

A lubricated finger had pressed inside him.

His body reacted instantly, tightening in fierce resistance. Xia Liu Yi’s muscles clenched as he swung a heavy slap toward him, only for He Chu San to dodge and silence him with another kiss.

“Shh,” he murmured softly against his lips. “They said this would feel good.”

“Bull—” Xia Liu Yi’s protest broke into muffled curses as he struggled.

He Chu San coaxed him gently, urging him to relax, though his finger felt trapped—unable to push further or withdraw under that iron-tight grip. The strength alone was daunting.

A soothing hand slid over his hip.

Xia Liu Yi’s body loosened—just slightly.

A moment later, he gasped sharply, swearing again as the finger advanced. Taking advantage of that brief opening, He Chu San pressed deeper, murmuring reassurance against his ear while his other hand stroked him steadily.

“Afraid your—!” Xia Liu Yi snapped, only to bite down on his ear instead.

The sharp sting drew a low groan from He Chu San, sending heat rushing through him again. His own arousal surged back to full hardness, pressing insistently against Xia Liu Yi’s abdomen.

Two fingers moved now—probing, searching.

Despite the pain, he persisted, murmuring low promises, telling him it would be over soon—just a little more—

“Find wha—” Xia Liu Yi’s words cut off in a broken gasp.

He Chu San had lowered his head, capturing one of his nipples between his lips.

The effect was immediate.

Compared to everything below, this sensation was overwhelming—sharp, electric, impossible to ignore. Xia Liu Yi’s body jolted violently, mouth falling open as a helpless sound escaped him.

“Let… go… damn… bra—”

He Chu San didn’t stop. He sucked harder, testing, discovering. Elsewhere, his touches had little effect—but here, even a light pinch drew a fierce reaction, color flooding Xia Liu Yi’s face.

So this was it.

Not cold—just different.

Encouraged, he focused there, licking, sucking, teasing relentlessly, while his fingers continued their slow, deliberate movement. Under the combined assault, Xia Liu Yi’s resistance began to melt away. His grip loosened, strength draining from his limbs. His legs trembled, nearly giving out, only for the pressure behind to force him upright again.

Pleasure and pain tangled together, wave after wave building without release.

Eyes squeezed shut, brows drawn tight, he ground himself unconsciously against He Chu San, chasing something he couldn’t quite reach—

Then suddenly—

His entire body froze.

As if a hidden switch had been struck, something exploded inside him. A blinding surge of sensation ripped through him, white and overwhelming, leaving his mind blank.

Every nerve lit up at once.

His legs gave out completely as he collapsed forward, eyes wide in shock. A long, broken sound tore from his throat—

“Ha—”

Before it could finish, another jolt seized him.

“Ah—ah… stop… stop—!”

But He Chu San didn’t stop.

Finding that point, he pressed into it firmly, again and again, swallowing every protest with his mouth. His other hand tugged and teased at the sensitive peak of his chest. The combined stimulation finally drove Xia Liu Yi over the edge.

His body arched, heat surging violently as release struck.

The force of it left him shaking, breath shattered, clinging helplessly as wave after wave crashed through him. Only after long seconds did the tension drain from his body, leaving him limp and trembling.

He collapsed against He Chu San, skin flushed and burning.

Their lips parted with a soft, wet sound, their ragged breathing swallowed by the steady rush of water.

……

After a simple cleanup, He Chu San wrapped Xia Liu Yi—who was still dazed, leaning against the wall—in a bath towel. He attempted a princess carry, but lacking the strength, he barely made it out of the bathroom before faltering, nearly dropping Boss Xia onto the floor—earning himself a hard smack on the head.

The two stumbled back onto the bed in a tangled embrace. Xia Liu Yi stretched out, sinking into the soft bedding as if floating on clouds. He stared blankly for a long time before coming back to himself. His first reaction was to swing another hard slap at He Chu San. “Bastard!”

Quick as lightning, He Chu San dove into his arms, the blow grazing only the top of his head. Lying against Xia Liu Yi’s chest, he called softly, “Brother Liu Yi…”

—as if he were the one who had just been thoroughly undone!

Xia Liu Yi’s voice trembled with anger. “What was that thing you used just now? Who gave it to you?”

“What thing?” He Chu San feigned ignorance.

“Don’t play dumb. The blue bottle!”

Still playing innocent, He Chu San said, “Didn’t you like it? That one has less foam. Next time we can use the green bottle—more foam—pfft!” He couldn’t hold it in.

“He—Chu—San! You bastard! When did you start colluding with that surnamed Cui? You’ve got some nerve laughing!”

“Ahh—ow! I won’t laugh, I won’t! Mercy, Brother Liu Yi—!”

The two ended up wrestling across the bed—more accurately, Boss Xia beating up Actor He. They fought, then kissed; kissed for a few minutes, then fought again. By the end, both were utterly exhausted, flushed, sprawled half-dead across the bed.

Face covered in handprints and bite marks, He Chu San mustered his last bit of strength to drag the kicked-off blanket back over them. Xia Liu Yi pulled him into his arms, closing his eyes to rest.

Just as drowsiness began to take him, He Chu Sanms voice sounded softly, “Brother Liu Yi.”

“Mm?”

“I met Sir Xie today.”

Xia Liu Yi’s drowsiness vanished instantly. He had not expected He Chu San to confess—he was even more tense than the other man, forcing himself calm. “Why did you meet him?”

“He asked me out. Tried to persuade me to expose you.”

“What did you say?”

“I said I don’t know anything—and I won’t help him.”

Xia Liu Yi gave a low “mm.”

He Chu San buried his face against his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have met him. But I was curious what he wanted from me… I was worried about you…”

He hesitated, choosing not to mention the listening device he had planted in Cui Dong Dong’s phone. He understood—no matter how tolerant Xia Liu Yi was, this would not be forgiven.

Xia Liu Yi said nothing, his breathing slow and deep. He Chu San endured a long stretch of unease and lingering fear, nearly thinking he had fallen asleep.

“I’ll consider going legitimate,” Xia Liu Yi said suddenly.

He Chu San lifted his head in surprise.

Eyes still closed, Xia Liu Yi spoke calmly, “The Azure Dragon Boss had thought about it before. But it involves too many people—the losses would be difficult to recover. If nothing else, the elders in the Hall wouldn’t agree. After I took over, for the sake of rapid growth, I couldn’t just let go either.”

He sighed softly. “I promise you—I’ll consider it. But we’ll have to plan it carefully.”

He opened his eyes and looked at He Chu San. His gaze was focused, serene. The flames that once burned fiercely in his eyes when this topic arose had quieted, now deep and still like the sea at midnight—reflecting only He Chu San within its hidden currents.

He raised a hand, gently caressing He Chu San’s cheek, and said softly—

“I also want to be with you.”

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  1. chaaamm Avatar

    😭😭😭 liu yi u’re making me cry😭😭😭😭😭😭

    Like

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