Boss Xia led the several hundred men under Xiaoqi Hall, great and small, sweeping across all quarters to suppress the likes of Fat Seven and his ilk. New establishments blossomed everywhere, and business prospered magnificently throughout the entire year. By year’s end, Cui Dongdong, acting as the manager, settled the accounts— from the big boss down to the lowliest lackeys, all had earned until their coffers overflowed. On Christmas Eve, Xia Liuyi booked out his own nightclub to hold a grand victory banquet, inviting the assembled elders and dozens of ranked brothers, distributing red envelopes in great number, and reveling through the night without rest.
Spring Festival family banquet
He was a big boss sharp of eye, ruthless of heart, and vicious of hand— outwardly wielding broad, decisive strokes, striking hard and reaping fiercely; inwardly adopting a people-friendly approach, generous and magnanimous, approachable and easygoing. With both silver notes and iron cudgel employed in turn, no matter which faction or band, all were disciplined into obedience, looking solely to him as their dragon head. The elders all regarded his performance with great favor; once the thick red envelopes were in hand, every one of them sang his praises without end.
Only Uncle Qiu, the youngest among the elders and relatively least senior, leaned in while toasting and spoke to him in a low, private tone, “Xiao Liu, you have made too many enemies. Better to tread carefully. Fat Seven has wandered the jianghu for decades— to have reached his current position, he is not to be underestimated.”
Xia Liuyi burst into hearty laughter, raising his wine cup high as he loudly expressed thanks, “By Uncle Qiu’s auspicious words! In the coming year, our company will surely ride smooth winds and flowing waters, expanding grandly!”
He tilted his head back and drained the cup in one gulp, then added in a lowered voice, “Uncle Qiu, thank you. Xiao Liu has been immature— in the future, I will still rely on your esteemed care.”
He went around exchanging toasts with each of the elders, but soon found himself surrounded and hemmed in by a crowd of subordinates, like stars encircling the moon, all pouring forth their praises. Xiao Ma stood upon the stage acting as master of ceremonies, delivering a grand, overblown speech:
“I must thank the company, thank the big boss, thank all the elders, thank all the brothers and sisters! For giving me, Xiao Ma, this opportunity—to turn over a new leaf, to be reborn as a man—no! To take on the role of manager and bring glory to our branch! Everything I have achieved today cannot be separated from the nurturing and promotion of our big boss! Our big boss is bold and straightforward, never fond of empty pretenses! And we should not engage in empty pretenses either—therefore, I propose! Every single person present shall each offer the big boss a cup!”
Squeezed beneath the stage, Xia Liuyi’s face turned green. He flung aside his cup and made to climb up and beat the man—a cup each?! You bastard, are you trying to drink your old man to death?!
Xiao Ma tossed away the microphone and fled in panic, yet still shouted at the top of his lungs, “Brothers! The big boss is right here! Seize the chance and go!”
Xia Liuyi hadn’t even managed to grab a corner of his clothes before he was drowned beneath the surging crowd and an ocean of wine!
“Boss! Boss! Come, let me toast you a cup!”
“Fill it up for the big boss, fill it up! Don’t worry, our big boss can drink a thousand cups without getting drunk!”
“Boss, blessed with boundless fortune! Long live the big boss!”
“Boss, you are my idol!”
“Boss, my wife wants an autographed photo of you! If I don’t bring it back, she won’t let me into the house tonight! Boss, have mercy…”
“Fuck! Don’t yank my clothes! Don’t touch me all over! Are you here to toast or to cop a feel? All of you—scram, scram, scram—!”
Here, Boss Xia fought alone against dozens of burly men, the scene chaotic and miserable beyond description; meanwhile, at the elders’ table, all was tranquil and harmonious. Several backbone members of the gang came forward to offer toasts. Cui Dongdong, her hair slicked neatly back, her features sharp and handsome, held a wine cup as she chatted and laughed freely with Uncle Yuan.
“Girl, you’ve worked hard this past year.”
“You flatter me—no hardship at all.”
“How is Paozai performing under you?”
“Clever and sensible—he has a promising future.”
……
The celebration banquet reached its climax amid song and dance, roaring laughter, and boisterous noise. A striptease star on stage shook her hips to lively music; each piece of clothing she removed meant another cup for the big boss. The heroes below enthusiastically agreed, bottles in hand as they searched everywhere—
“Eh? Where’s the big boss?”
“Where’s the big boss?!”
“Didn’t you lot just lift him up and toss him into the air?!”
“Where the hell did you throw him?!”
With a warm smile, Cui Dongdong bid farewell to several brothers and slipped out of the hall under the pretense of using the restroom. The moment she entered, she found one subordinate brother sprawled over a toilet, retching violently.
“Hey, this is the women’s restroom! If you’re going to puke, go next door!” she said, kicking him in disgust.
The man, muddle-headed, glanced at her, then looked around at the surroundings, puzzling over it for quite some time. “No, this is the men’s restroom… Boss Dongdong, aren’t you here too—AHHH! Sis Dongdong, I was wrong! I was wrong! Spare me—AHHH!”
Slap! Slap! Slap! Slap! Slap!
Five minutes later, Cui Dongdong calmly set down the rubber plunger she had snapped in half, grabbed the collar of the now pig-headed, swollen-faced brat, and tossed him out of the restroom.
Another five minutes later, she had restored her appearance—hair gleaming, suit immaculate—and walked out. Without even glancing at the hall that had turned into a mortal hellscape, she took the staff passage straight to the general manager’s office on the second floor.
Xia Liuyi lay sprawled on her sofa, bare-chested, limbs flung wide. At his feet lay two garments—his jacket and shirt—torn almost into strips. A damp towel lay crumpled over his face.
“Damn that bunch of bastards… lock the doors, set the place on fire, burn them all to death…” Hearing Cui Dongdong enter, he cursed weakly. “Pour me a glass of water…”
Cui Dongdong opened the cabinet and poured him a glass of red wine. Xia Liuyi slowly sat up; the moment he saw the glass, his face turned green. “Fuck, I’m about to puke from drinking! And you’re still making me drink?!”
“This is all there is. If you want something else, go downstairs and get it yourself.”
Xia Liuyi slapped the towel over his face and dropped straight back down. “Just watch me die then! No loyalty, no conscience…”
“Enough, enough—at your age, what are you acting spoiled for?” Cui Dongdong said, pressing the intercom. “Two iced lemon teas, two bowls of wonton noodles.”
Only after the waiter delivered the food and drinks did Xia Liuyi struggle up and gulp down half a cup of lemon tea before finding the strength to curse back, “Fuck your mother, how the hell was I acting spoiled?”
Cui Dongdong puffed on her cigar while mixing her noodles with chopsticks, speaking casually, “My mother’s long dead—more than ten years ago, on this very night. She caught syphilis and couldn’t afford treatment.”
Xia Liuyi, as someone who likewise held no fond impression of his own parents, consoled her earnestly, “Serves her right! Damn bitch who gave birth but didn’t raise—sold you to a pervert when you were eight.”
“I was just reminding you not to fuck her. She has syphilis.”
“……”
These two ill-fated big bosses, both without childhoods, sat side by side on the sofa, slurping noodles along with lemon tea. At last, they managed to fill their stomachs—having been busy socializing downstairs, they had been starving. With bellies full and wine settled, they began picking their teeth with toothpicks and discussing proper matters.
“What did Uncle Yuan want with you?” Xia Liuyi asked lazily, leaning back on the sofa.
“He wants to promote Paozai to ‘White Paper Fan’,” Cui Dongdong said. “I think he still doesn’t fully trust us—wants to plant a few more eyes.”
Xia Liuyi sneered. “Doesn’t trust us? Then he can come do it himself! At his age, still fucking pointing fingers!”
“I don’t think he has ill intentions,” Cui Dongdong said. “He’s just worried you’ll run the company into the ground and affect the elders’ interests. After all, your conflict with Fat Seven has been quite intense lately. He’s also heard that Fat Seven and Sha Jiajun have been inviting other big bosses on the circuit to dine together. We still don’t know where the other factions stand—if they truly unite against us, it will indeed be troublesome.”
Xia Liuyi applied force with his fingers, slowly grinding his cigarette into crumbs, though his expression remained calm. “Fat Seven—I will definitely kill him. It’s only a matter of time. As for everything else, I have my own measure. Those old fools—short-sighted, timid—no wonder they can’t accomplish great things.”
Cui Dongdong laughed. “Well said. I can’t stand Fat Seven either. I’ll handle appeasing the elders. But what about the ‘Red Pole’ that Elder Ge inserted? That kid’s caused quite a bit of trouble lately—I think he’s trying to earn merit.”
“Let him,” Xia Liuyi said. “Next time we go after Fat Seven, let him take the vanguard.”
Cui Dongdong smiled again around her cigarette, understanding at once.
“Fat Seven and the elders are nothing,” Xia Liuyi said. “What bothers me is the cops.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Last month when we distributed red envelopes, one newly transferred inspector refused to accept.”
“If he won’t accept, force him to. Toss a petrol bomb into his courtyard—we’ve done it before,” Cui Dongdong said.
“This one’s not convenient to make a scene,” Xia Liuyi replied. “Nephew of the Deputy Commissioner of Police, strong backing, high pride. Even Inspector Hua couldn’t persuade him.”
“Oh? What position?”
“Probationary Inspector—nothing much. But Inspector Hua is set to retire next year, and the successor hasn’t been decided yet. I’m worried there may be variables.”
The name Inspector Hua was merely an elegant appellation used within the jianghu; his true identity was that of a Chief Inspector in Kowloon East. For many years he had accepted red envelopes far and wide, showing earnest “care” toward the underworld brothers, blessing them with ever-flowing wealth. Once this old man let go and departed, who knew how many big bosses would lie awake at night, lovesick to the point of illness.
Xia Liuyi and Cui Dongdong, wolf and jackal in collusion, sat at opposite ends of the sofa, facing two bowls of noodle scraps, each sinking into brief contemplation. At length, the two murmured together in low voices, exchanged schemes, and struck the final decision—thus, a treacherous plot was set.
A few days later, the round-faced little songstress kept by Cui Dongdong transformed herself in a single turn into Cui Dongdong’s “cousin”, newly returned from emigrating to America and visiting relatives in Hong Kong. Unfamiliar with the place, she encountered hooligans attempting to assault her outside a bar—fortunately, a probationary inspector passing by after work intervened, playing the hero to save the beauty, thus creating a fine tale. That this fine tale would later turn into prophecy—when the young inspector and the “cousin” developed feelings over time and spent a night of spring together, only to be caught red-handed by the “husband” who had rushed back from America to catch adultery, beaten and violated, photographed in compromising poses, and subsequently blackmailed—this, the author is too lazy to recount in detail, and shall be left as a later matter.
Let us return to one of the protagonists who briefly vanished in the thousands of words above—He Chusan. On the following morning, due to the Christmas holiday, he did not need to intern or work. Early in the day, carrying his small schoolbag, he arrived at school and placed the books he needed to return into the holiday return box of the library. Then, holding two bowls of fish balls, he squatted outside the closed billiards hall, waiting.
Around noon, Xia Liuyi arrived alone by car, yawning as he lifted the rolling shutter door and let him in. “When did you get here?”
Having already finished both bowls of fish balls himself, He Chusan replied sullenly, “This morning. I waited for you three hours.”
“Did I tell you to come that early?” Xia Liuyi said, opening the fridge, pulling out a can of cola, and tossing it to him.
He Chusan lowered his head to pry open the can, a trace of grievance in his voice. “You said the morning.”
“As long as lunch hasn’t been eaten, everything is still ‘morning’ at your Brother Liuyi’s place.” Xia Liuyi poked his dull head with a cue stick. And you actually expected your big boss to wake up early!
“Put the schoolbag down—let’s eat first,” Xia Liuyi said, tapping the long-neglected little bag with his cue. “When we get back, I’ll teach you side-spin shots.”
The two closed the shutter and walked side by side toward a nearby tea restaurant, chatting as they went.
“Idiot, you just waited like that for three hours? Couldn’t you call me? …Tsk, right, you don’t have a phone. Brother Liuyi will get you a mobile phone. Come pick it up tomorrow.”
“I…”
“If you dare say again that you won’t spend a gangster’s money, I’ll make you stand there and watch me eat later!”
“I was going to say the company will issue me one next month.”
“The boss likes you that much? Planning to keep you as a pretty boy?”
“It’s standard for my position—so we can contact clients.”
“Look at you, He A-San, all grown up! An elite now? Everyone gets a mobile phone? Who are you trying to fool?”
“……” He Chusan sighed helplessly, clearly thinking, believe it or not, suit yourself.
Xia Liuyi couldn’t stand that prematurely world-weary look and smacked him on the head, then changed the subject. “How was Christmas Eve last night? Celebrated with your father?”
“My father said it’s a foreign devil’s festival—he doesn’t celebrate it.”
“……”
“Brother Liuyi, will you come to my house for Spring Festival? My father agreed too. I’ll make char siu dumplings for you.”
“Fuck, I’ve got my own home and I’m not going back, but I should go to yours? And I need your father’s permission?!”
“I asked Brother Xiao Ma. He said he’s going back to Guangzhou for the New Year. Sister Dongdong is going to Thailand with her girlfriend—they both asked me to take care of you.”
“……” Take care your asses! Bunch of disloyal bastards!
“Come on, Brother Liuyi?”
“…Hmph.”
After a simple meal, they bought a bag of egg waffles and strolled back slowly while eating. Pulling up the shutter, He Chusan skillfully cleared the table and set up the balls, then cautiously asked, “You’re not going to call a pretty girl over again, right?”
Xia Liuyi sprawled in the boss chair, legs spread wide, munching egg waffles. “Call your mother! The high-end girls from Cui Dongdong’s venue cost two thousand a night—no discount even for the big boss! Last time you wasted my two thousand—I haven’t even settled that with you yet!”
The brat, back turned as he arranged the table, actually started shaking with suppressed laughter upon hearing this. Xia Liuyi’s temper flared—he raised a long leg and kicked him square on the ass!
With a footprint on his backside, He Chusan leaned over the table, hips lifted, turning his head with a teasing air. “Brother Liuyi, you said you’d teach side-spin shots. Come on.”
Fucking asking for it! No—bah!
I don’t want to fuck him!
While cursing himself, Xia Liuyi tossed aside the bag of egg waffles and walked over—completely unaware that his own posture, hips slightly raised, carried just as much suggestive flair. “Watch carefully!”
He Chusan’s gaze couldn’t help but trace along the curve of his waist, finally settling on that firm, rounded backside. He swallowed quietly.
“Mm. I’m watching.”
On such festive holidays, the streets and alleys were filled with white-bearded Santas, restaurants and malls crowded with people eating and shopping, scenic spots and amusement parks packed with couples lining up in pairs. Everywhere was bustling and noisy. Yet these two shut their rolling door, set down their cola, and hid away in a small shop, playing billiards the entire afternoon in peaceful seclusion.
After over a year of being “tempered” by Xia Liuyi, He Chusan’s skills had improved considerably. Xia Liuyi’s right hand wasn’t fully steady, and his flashy techniques would occasionally falter. After a long, fierce match, it was Xia Liuyi who, for once, lost by several points.
Boss Xia tossed his cue aside and shamelessly tried to renege. “It’s mealtime. Let’s go—I’ll take you out for Western food.”
“We agreed whoever loses cooks,” He Chusan said. “At this hour, Western restaurants won’t have seats.”
“I only know how to cook noodles! After playing all afternoon, you expect me to just eat a bowl of noodles?”
“You cook the noodles, I’ll make salt-baked chicken and turnip cake, okay?”
“You can make salt-baked chicken?”
“Auntie Ah Hua taught me a few times.”
Boss Xia continued trying to dodge. “Salt-baked chicken goes better with rice.”
He Chusan blinked. “Brother Liuyi, are you going back on your word?”
Xia Liuyi’s face shifted between green and white. “…Carry your schoolbag!”
They got into the car one after the other. He Chusan asked in confusion, “Brother Liuyi, why are you so afraid of cooking?”
“…,” Xia Liuyi muttered vaguely.
“What?”
“I once burned… cough… the stove,” Xia Liuyi said.
“……” That damn little fox looked at him again with that strange, complicated gaze—so much so that Xia Liuyi nearly lost his grip on the steering wheel.
“I burned down a house while cooking! Three floors! The butler and maids all had to jump into the swimming pool! Satisfied now?!” Xia Liuyi slammed the horn in embarrassment and anger.
“……”
“The hell are you shaking for? If you’ve got guts, laugh out loud!”
“Pfft—HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
Amid Xia Liuyi’s furious shouting, He Chusan buried his face in his schoolbag, wiping tears as he laughed so hard his abs began to cramp.
—Indeed, breaking legs, burning houses, slashing others and himself into bloody messes… to raise such a disaster child whose destructive power rivaled a falling meteor—-Boss Qinglong’s patience and perseverance were truly not to be underestimated. Over more than a decade of storms and hardship, it was simply unbearable to recall.
At this moment, He Chusan could only sympathize with Qinglong from a distance. But half an hour later, when he stood inside Xia Liuyi’s unexpectedly shabby village house—a simple two-story place with nothing but the most basic furniture—he truly came to understand Qinglong’s hardships.
“Brother Liuyi, the pot is small—use medium heat!”
“Brother Liuyi, boil the water first before putting in the noodles! Take them out first!”
“You don’t need to add oil when cooking noodles!”
“That’s a serving plate—you can’t put it on the fire, Brother Liuyi!”
“The seasoning goes in the bowl—you don’t pour it into the pot! If you pour it in, everything’s gone! Hey!”
“Hey your mother! Shut up!”
“……”
An hour later, He Chusan sat at the table. Before him were a fragrant plate of salt-baked chicken, a fragrant plate of shrimp-paste turnip cake, a fragrant plate of blanched greens… and two large bowls of steaming white rice.
A lump of foul-smelling, charred noodles lay abandoned in the kitchen trash bin, while Xia Liuyi lounged on the sofa, smoking and watching TV—just short of planting a sign beside it reading: “Told you I can’t cook, idiot!”
The once-naïve He Chusan, who had believed that with enough effort he might at least eat a bowl of noodles cooked by a underworld big boss, sighed like an old man as he set out the chopsticks. “Brother Liuyi, come eat.”
Even so, Boss Xia kept complaining—the chicken was overcooked, the turnip cake too salty, the vegetables… well, those were acceptable, no skill required. The rice was barely edible.
He Chusan kept nodding while sighing. “Yes, yes—I’ll do better next time, Brother Liuyi.”
Xia Liuyi paused with his chopsticks, glancing sideways at him. Next time?
“There won’t be a next time,” he said casually. “If I want to eat, can’t I just go out?”
He Chusan quietly nudged a chicken drumstick toward him but didn’t dare place it directly into his bowl. “You eat out all the time—it’s not good for your health.”
“Can’t I hire a chef? Do I need you?”
He Chusan sighed again and picked up a tough chicken claw for himself, his expression clearly saying, fine, fine, I know you’re rich.
Xia Liuyi slammed his chopsticks. He Chusan immediately lowered his head and gnawed silently, not daring to breathe loudly.
After eating half a plate of chicken in silence, He Chusan saw Xia Liuyi’s expression soften slightly and cautiously spoke again, “Brother Liuyi, do you have anything to do after dinner?”
“Hm?”
“There’s a new movie during Christmas—Days of Being Wild. I’ll treat you to see it in the cinema, okay?”
“Your school gave out free tickets again?”
“I got paid on the fifteenth.” Poor He Chusan.
“…Hmph.”
Futile Devices Scans 
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