Xia Liu Yi suddenly lunged forward and pinned him down. “Shut up! You’re not allowed to say we should end it!”
He lowered his head, trying to silence He Chu San with a kiss. He Chu San bit him without mercy, but even with blood filling his mouth, Xia Liu Yi refused to let go. Grappling—one clinging, the other pushing away—they toppled onto the bed. Xia Liu Yi started tugging at He Chu San’s trousers. This barbaric, thickheaded gangster actually thought a conflict between their hearts could be solved by joining their bodies. Bitterly disappointed, He Chu San drove a hard fist into Xia Liu Yi’s abdomen.
He shoved Xia Liu Yi away, rolled off the bed, and headed straight for the door.
Xia Liu Yi endured the pain and chased after him, catching his arm at the bedroom doorway. He slammed the door shut again and pinned He Chu San against it.
“I can’t forget Azure Dragon! I’ll never forget Azure Dragon!” Xia Liu Yi roared, his eyes bloodshot. “He saved me. He raised me. I could die for him! If someone murdered him, of course I’d avenge him! If someone killed your dad, wouldn’t you do the same?! Am I wrong for doing this?!”
“Of course you’re not wrong!” He Chu San shouted back. “I’m the one who’s wrong! I was wrong to expect you to like me! I should never have gone after you in the first place!”
“What you shouldn’t have done was come after me and then decide you could dump me!” Xia Liu Yi roared.
His throat seized. He gripped He Chu San tightly, and it took everything he had before he could force his voice out again.
“Yes, I could die for Azure Dragon—but you’re the reason I wanted to live! In Thailand, Xiao Ma died. Qin Hao and I were being hunted. We fell down a mountain, injured and feverish. During the day, we hid in the woods and soaked in rivers. At night, we slept in trees and caves. We ate wild fruit, raw fish, insects, rats… Every time I thought I couldn’t hold on anymore, I thought of you. I’ve never been that afraid in my whole life! I was afraid I’d die. I was afraid I’d never see you again. I even regretted ever meeting you, because if I’d never met you, I wouldn’t know what happiness was, and I wouldn’t know what fear was either! You’re the one who taught me that when I’m hungry, I should eat; when I’m tired, I should sleep; when I’m sick, I should rest. You’re the one who watched fireworks with me, watched sunsets with me, cooked and ate with me at home. You taught me what happiness was. I want you to be happy too. I truly don’t want to make you sad—not even a little. I kept telling myself I had to hold on. I had to come back alive to see you. I had to stay in this world and be with you…”
A tear slid down his face.
“That was when I finally understood. What I feel for Azure Dragon is gratitude and reverence. He’s one of the most important members of my family, just like Xiao Man. I admit I once felt an impulse toward him, but it was only a momentary impulse. I didn’t dare cross that line. I stopped myself from falling any deeper. If I’d truly loved him enough to throw everything away, how could I have given him up and pushed him toward Xiao Man? But I don’t want to give you up, no matter what happens. I don’t want to hand you over to anyone!”
His wet eyes fixed on He Chu San as he pleaded, trembling, “A’San, I like you. I love you. I don’t love him. You’re the only one I love. Please don’t say we should separate. I can’t take it. Please…”
He cautiously tried to kiss He Chu San again. This time, He Chu San did not resist. Xia Liu Yi tasted salty tears on his lips—He Chu San was crying too.
He Chu San’s heart thundered, his mind in utter chaos. He could not say a word. The tears simply kept falling, and he could no longer tell whether they came from Xia Liu Yi’s confession or from the release of all the pain and repression he had buried for so long.
He had never dared hope to hear, I love you, not him. From the very beginning of his acquaintance with Xia Liu Yi, he had known about Xia Liu Yi’s feelings for Azure Dragon. Before He Chu San even realized he himself had fallen for Xia Liu Yi, he had been moved by those feelings and had pitied him for them. He might have told himself he refused to admit defeat, might even have resolved to compete with a dead man, but in truth he had bowed his head to Azure Dragon from the very beginning. He had always thought of himself as an outsider who had overstepped his place. He had managed their relationship with painstaking care, as considerate, gracious, and restrained as a virtuous consort in an imperial harem, never daring to cross a line, never even daring to mention Azure Dragon’s name. He had always believed Xia Liu Yi’s feelings for him came from being worn down by his persistence, from indulgence and affection, from simply becoming accustomed to having someone take such attentive care of him. He had never even allowed himself to hope for the words I love you. That was why Xia Liu Yi’s proposal had shocked him speechless.
Only now did he finally begin to realize: was this entire fight truly Xia Liu Yi’s fault alone? Were Xia Liu Yi’s secrets and lies really only because of Azure Dragon? Wasn’t he also afraid of dragging He Chu San into danger, afraid He Chu San might be hurt? He Chu San had always placed himself so low in this relationship and had been so painfully sensitive to Xia Liu Yi’s deception—but was that truly because Xia Liu Yi did not trust him, or because He Chu San himself had never trusted Xia Liu Yi’s feelings for him?
“I’m sorry, Brother Liu Yi,” he finally choked out. “I’m sorry I made you sad. I don’t want to separate from you at all. Everything I said before was out of anger. I was being stupid.”
“I’m the one who owes you an apology.” Xia Liu Yi pulled him tightly into his arms. “I’m the stupid one. I’ve thought about you every minute and every second. I should’ve come to you sooner. I should’ve said all of this sooner. I just couldn’t put my pride aside.”
He Chu San smiled through his tears. “That’s right, Boss. You care way too much about saving face.”
Xia Liu Yi could not laugh. He knew He Chu San was joking to ease the tension, but the smile only made his chest ache. He was right. Of all the fights they had ever had, how many times had He Chu San been the one to come smiling as though nothing had happened and make peace first? Just because Xia Liu Yi cared about his pride, did that mean He Chu San had to swallow his hurt every single time? What kind of bastard had he been?
“I’m sorry.” He wiped the tears from He Chu San’s face and said it again and again. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry…”
He Chu San stopped the words with a tender, precious kiss.
They kissed for a long time. When their lips finally parted reluctantly, they looked at each other’s red, swollen, tear-stained eyes and both found the sight a little funny.
Then, belatedly, something like an electric current shot through He Chu San. Only now did wild delight erupt inside him—Brother Liu Yi had actually said he loved him and not Azure Dragon! He had been so terrified of He Chu San breaking up with him that he had cried! Dear heavens! He Chu San wanted to fling open the window and scream at the entire city, then run downstairs, light firecrackers, and celebrate!
Overexcited, he suddenly turned his head and sneezed violently.
Xia Liu Yi felt his forehead and frowned with concern. “You still have a fever. Get back into bed and rest.”
He Chu San rubbed his cheek against Xia Liu Yi’s palm and whined through his stuffy nose, “I’m hungry.”
Xia Liu Yi remembered the bowl of blackened sludge in the kitchen. “Uh… should I order takeaway?”
He Chu San laughed again. “Where are you going to find takeaway this late? I remember there are abalone-sauce noodles and wontons in the fridge. Cook me a bowl of wonton noodles. I’ll teach you.”
…
Xia Liu Yi wrapped He Chu San in so many layers that he was practically bundled into a cocoon, then had him stand in the kitchen doorway and direct him. Teacher He patiently taught his student to wash the pot, light the stove, boil the water, and add the noodles. Student Xia paid rapt attention, more nervous than he had been the first time he ever picked up a blade to cut someone.
A little over ten minutes later, Xia Liu Yi actually placed two enormous bowls of fragrant wonton noodles on the dining table. He could hardly believe it himself. He almost wanted to take a photograph, frame it, and hang it in the living room.
“Eat before it gets cold,” He Chu San urged. “Try it. You cooked it really well.”
Xia Liu Yi cautiously tasted a bite and stared in surprise. He had actually cooked a bowl of noodles that tasted normal!
A profound sense of accomplishment swept over him. This was much more satisfying than being Dragon Head! It immediately made him want to aim even higher. “I’ll make congee for you tomorrow!”
“Hahaha, no thanks. I’m afraid you really will burn the kitchen down.” He Chu San laughed. “From now on, just wash the dishes like a good boy. I’ll do the cooking.”
Xia Liu Yi smiled too. He knew exactly what He Chu San meant: He was going to cook for him for the rest of their lives. He immediately lost interest in his noodles. Emboldened, he pulled the ring from his trouser pocket again. “Then… will you take this back?”
He Chu San’s face stiffened. He stared silently at the ring while Xia Liu Yi watched him anxiously, waiting.
Suddenly, He Chu San stood and walked toward the bedroom.
Confused and alarmed, Xia Liu Yi clenched the ring in his hand and hurried after him. But He Chu San merely rummaged through the drawers and cupboards until he found two red cords, then turned around and asked, “Where’s the jade Buddha I gave you?”
Xia Liu Yi hurriedly retrieved the jade Buddha pendant from the bedside drawer. He Chu San threaded one red cord through the pendant and the other through the ring, then hung the jade Buddha around Xia Liu Yi’s neck.
“Who would’ve thought this would be the thing that lasted the longest?” He Chu San murmured, rubbing the jade Buddha between his fingers. “Don’t lose it again.”
“I won’t,” Xia Liu Yi promised seriously.
“Put mine on me too.” He Chu San nodded toward the ring.
Xia Liu Yi slipped the red cord with the ring around his neck as well. As he leaned close to tie the cord, He Chu San suddenly caught his chin, forcing him to lift his face, and looked straight into his eyes from only inches away.
“You really only love me?”
Xia Liu Yi’s pupils were filled entirely with He Chu San’s reflection. “Yes.”
“No matter what happens, you’ll stay with me?”
“Yes.”
He Chu San smiled and leaned forward to kiss him.
“So will I.”
…
They clung to each other affectionately for a while longer, then walked hand in hand back to the living room like two children and sat down to finish their noodles. They had barely eaten a few bites when Xia Liu Yi suddenly remembered something horrifying. “Then… what about your dad?”
He Chu San’s chopsticks twitched. They stared at each other and saw exactly the same guilty unease reflected in one another’s eyes.
“Ahem. Maybe… leave it alone for now? Give him some time to calm down by himself?” He Chu San suggested.
“Then… yeah. Let’s leave it for now,” Xia Liu Yi agreed.
On the matter of Father He, the two reached an astonishingly swift consensus. At the same time, they buried their metaphorical ostrich heads in their bowls and noisily slurped their noodles.
Afterward, Xia Liu Yi diligently washed the dishes, tidied the kitchen, and hurried through his own washing up. He Chu San had already finished and was waiting in bed. Xia Liu Yi strode into the room and saw him wearing matching bear pajamas, wrapped in the blanket and leaning against the headboard. His cheeks were faintly flushed as he smiled, his eyes full of springtime invitation, his loose bangs still slightly damp.
That clean, innocent, handsome young face sent arrow after arrow straight into Boss Xia’s heart.
He Chu San lifted the blanket and patted the bed invitingly. Xia Liu Yi’s heart—and something lower—gave a violent jolt. He launched himself onto the bed, wrapped He Chu San in his arms, and flopped down beside him, planting several hard kisses on his warm, fever-flushed cheeks.
Xia Liu Yi’s own face reddened badly. Forehead pressed against He Chu San’s, he murmured, “Tonight… do you want to…” He could not finish.
“Hm? Do I want to what?” He Chu San deliberately played dumb.
Xia Liu Yi bit his lip in retaliation and shamelessly forced the words out. “Do you want to fuck me?”
He Chu San chuckled softly, kissed him several times, and said with a laugh, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. I can still help scratch your itch, though…”
As he spoke, his warm hand slid down Xia Liu Yi’s smooth back and disappeared between his firm buttocks. Both of them heard the slick, wet sound of his fingers working at the entrance. Xia Liu Yi let out a helpless low moan, tightened his embrace, and buried his face against He Chu San’s shoulder.
…
Night deepened. After days of anxiety and worry, Xia Liu Yi had finally found release, both body and mind relaxing as he fell into a deep sleep with his head pillowed on He Chu San’s arm. He Chu San had spent the entire day in bed and was not sleepy at all. He turned his head and watched Xia Liu Yi’s face in the moonlight, gently smoothing his hair and rubbing his thin, soft earlobe between his fingers.
Xia Liu Yi showed no sign of being disturbed. His strong brows had relaxed completely. He looked peaceful and happy.
He Chu San kissed his forehead softly and sighed. “Idiot.”
Don’t be an idiot again. Whatever you want to do, I’ll do it for you—in my own way.
…
Monday morning dawned bright and sunny. Deputy Hall Master Cui enjoyed a rich, delicious breakfast at home before arriving fashionably late at headquarters. As she walked through the building, she found the entire hall strangely harmonious, everyone’s faces brimming with cheer. An office directly opposite the president’s office had been cleared out, and the manager who used to work there was packing up his belongings outside.
Curious, Deputy Hall Master Cui wandered over and poked her head through the doorway. Adviser He sat properly behind the desk and greeted her with a sincere smile. “Good morning, Sister Dong Dong.”
Cui Dong Dong stared. “Sammy-boy? You’re working here now?”
“Three days a week. I’ll be providing comprehensive services for the company.” He Chu San had only recently recovered from his illness and still looked slightly pale, but he was nevertheless positively glowing.
Cui Dong Dong opened her mouth, remained speechless for several seconds, then coughed. “Right. You’re busy. I won’t interrupt your work.” She turned around, marched straight to Xia Liu Yi’s office, and shut the door behind herself.
She crossed the room in several strides and hissed, “Boss, have you lost your mind?”
Xia Liu Yi was humming while wiping the group photograph on his desk with a tissue. He looked up blankly. “What did I do?”
“You actually let Sammy-boy set up shop here?!”
Xia Liu Yi lowered his head again, breathed onto the glass of the photograph, and polished it noisily with his tissue. In an excellent mood, he said, “He is a consultant. If I want him handling company matters, where else is he supposed to work? Relax. I explained everything clearly. He won’t be allowed near anything he shouldn’t know about.”
“That kid wins people over like a plague of locusts sweeping through a field. Look how happy everyone outside is today!” Cui Dong Dong said. “Can you guarantee nobody’s secretly feeding him information?”
“Relax!” Xia Liu Yi flicked her forehead and continued grinning. “There isn’t much left that needs hiding from him anyway. Golden Maitreya is dead, and we’ve washed our hands of the ‘business’ he hated most. The others are being adjusted one by one too. What’s there to be afraid of?”
Cui Dong Dong lowered her voice. “What about the Old Shopkeeper?”
Xia Liu Yi stopped moving. “Only you and I know about the Old Shopkeeper. Are you going to tell him?”
Cui Dong Dong considered it and relaxed slightly, though she still pulled out her brick phone to examine it. “I’m just worried he planted a bug.”
“Oh, shut up.” Xia Liu Yi laughed and flicked her forehead again. “Quit trying to sow discord.”
The sight of him smiling gave Cui Dong Dong goosebumps. “Boss! How much love potion did he feed you? Lust has completely gone to your head!”
Then understanding dawned. She went around the desk, plopped onto the arm of his chair, and wrapped an arm around his shoulders with a wicked grin. “What happened? One weekend and you’re already back together? What did he use to sweet-talk you?”
“I sweet-talked him!”
Cui Dong Dong burst out laughing. “Stop joking! If you knew how to coax people, pigs would climb trees! Hahahaha…” Xia Liu Yi elbowed her, forcing her to swallow the rest of her laughter. “Seriously? You coaxed him? Tsk, tsk. Sammy-boy really knows how to manage his man. If he’d been born two hundred years earlier, he would’ve had the makings of an empress!”
Xia Liu Yi made as though to hit her again. She bounced out of reach, still laughing. “Seriously, what did you use to coax him? Diamond ring? Luxury watch? Sports car…”
“No, no, wait. Let me really think.” She contemplated aloud. “That little bastard earns more money than you. He wouldn’t care about any of that. I bet you two banged from dusk till dawn, right? What problem can’t be solved by a whole night of banging? Hahaha!”
“Bang, my ass. He’s been sick these past few days!”
“Then what exactly did you do?”
Xia Liu Yi’s handsome face turned faintly red. Somehow he looked even shyer than if he really had spent the entire night banging, smiling sweetly like a lovestruck teenager. “We just lay in bed together. I held him and talked to him, stayed with him while he slept… and I cooked noodles for him.”
“…”
Cui Dong Dong opened her mouth, remained speechless for several seconds, then coughed. “Boss, if the Hong Kong Film Awards had a category called ‘Purest Male Lead,’ you’d win it twenty-eight years in a row.”
Xia Liu Yi hurled the tissue box at her. “Get lost!”
Cui Dong Dong left laughing, only to be called back just as she reached the door. “Where are you going? Come back. Meeting.”
…
Boss Xia and Deputy Hall Master Cui gathered the society’s junior bosses for a routine meeting. Several restaurants under the newly promoted Qin Hao had been doing excellent business recently, earning him special praise from the Boss. Tiger Head, who managed several nightclubs and discos, looked considerably more miserable.
“Boss, everyone else sells ‘snacks’ in their clubs. We stopped selling them overnight, and now we don’t even let outsiders come in and sell. If all people can do is smoke hookah, who wants to come to our places? And those detectives heard our girls only keep customers company now and don’t sell sex anymore. You should hear the way they curse us! Some of the regulars don’t want to come either. They say we’re putting on airs and deliberately refusing their business! If this keeps up, I’m afraid everybody’s going to come after us!” Tiger Head complained.
“What are you shouting about?” Xia Liu Yi said. “Is that tiger skin of yours just for decoration? Nobody has leverage on you, so who exactly is going to come after you? Half those detectives have either been transferred out to the sticks or have the ICAC watching them so closely they’re slinking around with their tails between their legs, begging for scraps. You think they can still climb onto your head? Didn’t I give you the roller rink we opened before New Year? How’s business?”
Tiger Head grudgingly replied, “That one’s doing pretty well.”
“If it’s doing well, talk to Adviser He. Do some market research and find places to open a few branches.”
The moment Tiger Head heard that, his head began to hurt. Being none too bright, he immediately started complaining again. “Don’t even mention it, Boss! Adviser He insisted that my managers go through months of ‘training’ before they could take up their posts. He sent them to learn computers, English, finance, marketing—all sorts of stuff. And after they finish, they still have to take exams! Anyone who fails has to keep studying! What kind of gangster goes to school? If we were good at studying, why the hell would we become gangsters? I came out onto the streets when I was a teenager, and this is the first time I’ve heard that running a business requires all this nonsense! It wastes money, wastes time, and now I’m desperately short-handed!”
“If you’re desperately short-handed, that means you had that many unqualified managers!” Xia Liu Yi snapped. “You think coming out onto the streets as a teenager makes you impressive? How long has Adviser He been in this line? How much does he earn in a month, and how much do you earn? Someone’s teaching you how to make money and you’re still full of complaints?!”
Tiger Head was thoroughly scolded and did not dare release another complaint. He only muttered, “But I really don’t have enough people right now…”
“If you’re short, borrow somebody! Qin Hao, do you have anyone?”
“One new guy,” Qin Hao replied. “He passed the assessment Adviser He set, but he doesn’t have much experience.”
“Loan him to Tiger Head first. If he lacks experience, Tiger Head can train him personally. Black Chicken, what about you?”
Black Chicken, who managed lending and debt collection, had been staring down in thought. Hearing his name, he looked up. “Me? Boss, I’ve actually got plenty of spare manpower. Adviser He said the scope of operations for two of our finance companies needs changing, so they’re temporarily shut down while we reorganize and apply for new licenses. There hasn’t been much movement in revenue.”
“Take it slowly,” Xia Liu Yi reassured him. “If you’re short on money, tell Adviser He.”
“Don’t worry, Boss. Adviser He allocates funds every month to keep paying the brothers whose work has been suspended.”
Xia Liu Yi went around the room, giving advice to each of the other junior bosses in turn before finally dismissing the meeting. Everyone scattered immediately. Seeing that it was almost noon, he asked Cui Dong Dong, “Anything else? If not, come have lunch with me and A’San.”
“No thanks. There’s soup stewing at home. I’m going back.” Cui Dong Dong’s face immediately turned sweet and delighted. “Why don’t the two of you come over instead? I’ll tell Xiao Luo to make two extra dishes. The weather’s nice today. If there’s nothing urgent this afternoon, we could take the boat out, fish, get some sun?”
“Sure.”
Xia Liu Yi called in his secretary and cleared his afternoon schedule. Hearing Cui Dong Dong call Xiao Luo and tell her to make more food, he raised his voice and added, “Tell her to keep everything light. A’San only just recovered.”
“Did you hear that?” Cui Dong Dong said into the phone. “Boss says his precious little sweetheart is delicate, so make the food light.”
She dodged the tissue box Xia Liu Yi threw at her and trotted happily toward the office opposite his. “Adviser He! Come on, come on! Lunch at Big Sister’s place!”
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