During their first year together, both were still at university, and they were unbelievably happy. Before this, Qin Siyu had never imagined that love could be so sweet.
They often went to the library together.
The library was quiet, so when they wanted to talk they wrote messages on slips of paper and passed them back and forth. At first they only discussed practical matters, such as needing another fifteen minutes to finish a problem before going to dinner. Later, though, they sometimes wrote utterly pointless things.
One day, for instance, Aston was already reading when Qin Siyu arrived. He sat beside him, took out a piece of paper, wrote a few lines, and handed it over: “On the way here I heard a song on the radio outside a shop. It was so beautiful.”
“What song?” Aston wrote.
Qin Siyu wanted to tease him. He wrote, “I don’t know. It was a kind of chanting. The lyrics went like this: a a a a a a a a.”
Aston looked at the note, folded it, smiled at Qin Siyu, and wrote, “Beautiful.”
Qin Siyu’s heart tingled.
In their free time they climbed the clock tower together, visited the creek, and explored the university’s botanical gardens and zoo.
Once, alone together on the clock tower, Qin Siyu was discussing his studies when he suddenly asked, “Kingsy, I’ve been meaning to ask you something…”
Aston didn’t look at him. “Mm?”
“Why is it,” Qin Siyu asked, “that whenever we discuss serious matters, you never look at me? Do you dislike hearing about my work? But that doesn’t seem right. You always listen seriously and discuss it with me in detail. I really can’t figure it out.”
“…Seany,” Aston said helplessly, “because every time you look into my eyes, you… start speaking incoherently. It’s not very conducive to serious discussion.”
“Impossible.” Qin Siyu answered firmly. “That’s slander.”
Even more helpless, Aston turned and looked straight at him. “All right. Never mind. Go on.”
As soon as those blue eyes met his, Qin Siyu forgot everything he had been about to say. “Um, and then I, um…”
He turned away and covered his eyes with both hands. “Decided to apply for that program.”
Aston laughed softly, the sound mingling with the clock tower’s first chime on the hour.
Off campus, they sometimes took the steam train in Marin County. It traveled into the mountains through redwood trees, and there they could behave like an ordinary couple.
At other times they went to the forest in Tilden and walked the trails silently with fingers interlaced, their steps perfectly matched.
Sometimes they visited Golden Gate Park to walk or go boating. They paddled to Strawberry Hill, where there were trails, trees, stone bridges, and pavilions. Qin Siyu would tease him: “Kingsy, aren’t you on the rowing team? How did you let those people overtake you? Faster, faster!” Aston would reply icily, again and again, “Seany, you really need medical treatment.”
Sometimes they climbed the Berkeley hills, sat on the summit, and looked out toward the Golden Gate.
They also fished for saltwater fish from the shore. Aston taught Qin Siyu to use a long rod, but he found earthworms revolting, so Qin Siyu had to thread every one onto the hook. After casting, they leaned quietly against each other, hardly talking for fear of disturbing the fish. Simply gazing at the view, feeling the sea breeze, and occasionally exchanging a smile could make them happy for hours.
Qin Siyu also taught Aston to catch crabs and sea urchins. He would lower a crab ring and pull it up with several crabs inside. At low tide Qin Siyu was especially good at using a long-handled net to scoop crabs from cracks between rocks. One sweep brought up a crab, and the next sweep brought another. Once they’d steamed the crabs, however, Aston had very little idea
how to crack them open or eat them. He could get at most a fifth of the meat, perhaps only a tenth, wasting so much because he’d always had servants at home. Qin Siyu was indignant at his lack of household skills. He peeled the crabs for Aston himself, extracting each tiny piece of meat until even a small crab yielded a little mountain on the plate. Then he dipped the meat in sauce with his chopsticks and fed Aston.
They tried water sports too.
As a San Franciscan, Qin Siyu was a competent swimmer. Aston loved surfing, and Qin Siyu wanted to love it too. After some practice he actually became fairly good.
They went to Lake Tahoe twice during their holidays. Aston’s family owned a vacation house there. During the day they sat by the water admiring the scenery or fishing; in the evenings they built a campfire and roasted marshmallows. Sitting together, they roasted the marshmallows in their hands and fed them to each other. Every night they hid behind the campfire to exchange gentle kisses; once it burned out completely, they kissed deeply beside the hearth.
They visited Crystal Cave once too. It was lit by incandescent bulbs, but some sections were very dark, and they secretly held hands.
For reasons Aston couldn’t understand, there were wet spots where Qin Siyu refused to risk ruining his shoes, so Aston carried him on his back.
Once, as they rounded a corner, they unexpectedly encountered someone. The stranger first saw a handsome man emerging and stared, then noticed that he was carrying an equally beautiful Chinese man on his back and became even more astonished.
Once or twice they went to Napa Valley to enjoy the scenery and tour castles.
The one less-than-perfect thing was Aston’s terrible jealousy.
Perhaps because their relationship couldn’t be made public, whenever anyone showed interest in Qin Siyu, Aston would spend the entire night pinning him beneath himself to reaffirm that he belonged to him, repeatedly marking him.
On several occasions Qin Siyu tactfully suggested, “Kingsy, perhaps you should drink some Chinese herbal medicine to help regulate your constitution?”
Aston refused all such treatment. Instead he nibbled Qin Siyu’s skin and left one love bite after another in places other people couldn’t see, so Qin Siyu could hardly ever take off his shirt in public throughout the year.
They continued renting houses, although they moved once.
The two were extremely careful, almost never appearing in the neighborhood or before their neighbors.
But on Halloween, Qin Siyu accidentally cut the web of his hand while carving a jack-o’-lantern. They had to rush out to stop the bleeding and came face to face with the couple next door. The neighbors stared at Qin Siyu for a while, then at Aston. When the two returned that same day, they packed everything and moved. Aston had even rented the place under a false name.
Once they reached their new “home,” Qin Siyu didn’t dwell on the fact that it might also be temporary. He devoted himself to making it beautiful.
After moving all their furniture, he selected decorations, framed pictures, flowers, plants, and household goods to suit the size and layout of the house and the dimensions and shapes of the rooms.
He cherished the place, spending days fixing it up. There were holes in the walls, so he bought wall filler from a hardware store, applied it, sanded it smooth when it dried, and went to buy white paint. But it was almost impossible to find a perfectly matching white. Each brand had a slight difference, so Qin Siyu crouched on the floor mixing colors and testing them.
Aston saw him and crouched beside him. He had studied oil painting and understood color. He produced a palette and a fine paintbrush and began painstakingly blending white paints, a little of one brand, a little of another. Several times Qin Siyu thought the colors already matched and said it was enough, but Aston shook his head. “Still not quite.” He continued until the shades were truly identical.
Qin Siyu also opened the windows and cleaned the grooves of their tracks with a syringe and a small rag, then waxed the sliding rails.
He did the same for the doors, polishing the brass handles bright. Aston embraced him from behind and rubbed his head against Qin Siyu’s shoulder several times. “Sean, we may… need to move again very soon. We might not stay in this house for long. Perhaps there’s no need to cherish it so much.”
“Cherishing my own home…” Qin Siyu paused and looked puzzled. “What does that have to do with the house itself?”
Aston looked at him.
“It has only to do with you, Kingsy,” Qin Siyu said.
They gazed deeply at one another for a long time. Then Aston said, “I understand. I’m sorry.”
Afterward he went into the yard and continued designing the garden, building flowerbeds, laying paths, placing decorative stones, and arranging ornaments and garden lights. This time, when choosing the rental, they’d paid particular attention to the windows: none of the neighbors could see its back garden.
Qin Siyu was often the one who taught Aston how to look after their rooms and do domestic chores. Aston understood almost immediately when shown.
They learned a great deal from each other, since their past experiences were so different. If there was something Qin Siyu or Aston disliked learning, the other didn’t mind and simply did it alone. Such moments were rare, though. They always wanted to be together.
They were both busy, yet each wanted to do a little more so the other could rest. Whoever returned “home” first would tidy up and begin preparing dinner at the appropriate time, then wait for the other. Qin Siyu made Chinese food more often, and Aston more often cooked Western dishes.
They were like little animals. Whenever the person they were waiting for arrived, the other would run to meet him at the door, welcome him into the entrance hall, bring him home, embrace him, and kiss his lips.
The only person who probably knew about their relationship was Cliff.
Cliff was far too clever.
He had witnessed his best friend’s remarkable ability to change expressions. Whenever nobody else was around and Sean approached, a smile would spread over Aston’s face, and even his entire manner would seem full of springtime.
Aston had once asked Cliff, “Sean truly is the most beautiful person in the world, male or female, isn’t he?”
Cliff, who almost always smiled, fell silent for a long while. He dared neither agree nor disagree.
Between studying, working, volunteering, and being in love, Qin Siyu was naturally a little tired.
But miraculously, he had acquired his very own “Snail Maiden.”
Apart from the rent, he didn’t want to take Aston’s money.
Their relationship was complicated enough; he didn’t want to make it still more complicated.
Yet Qin Siyu kept discovering that documents and papers he’d brought home without typing… would somehow have been typed all by themselves.
Sometimes he’d typed only a little and had to put the work aside. But by the time he came back from university or the hospital, the completed typescript would be lying neatly on the desk, beautiful to look at.
So Qin Siyu told Aston the folktale of the Snail Maiden.
“A great river snail was kept in a jar,” he explained. “It turned into a fairy who secretly took care of everything for the male protagonist… And she…”
Aston wasn’t remotely interested in what the maiden had done. He asked only, “Did they end up together?”
Qin Siyu paused. “Mm. They got together.”
Naturally, the two of them made love.
They liked making love.
Still, Qin Siyu was a little frightened of becoming stupid. The common belief of the time was that too much sex would make a person stupid. Qin Siyu doubted it, but he wasn’t eager to take risks. Becoming stupid was no small matter!
So they would spend a long time tangled together in the bedroom. They stimulated each other in every way they could imagine, yet also restrained themselves. Only after an entire night would they finally join body and soul, often leaving Qin Siyu completely drained of strength.
Qin Siyu truly could not withstand Aston’s eyes.
Each time, at the final moment, if Aston raised his lowered eyes and fixed them on him, Qin Siyu would inevitably lose control and offer his soul along with his body.
In fact, he was gradually beginning to believe that too much lovemaking really did make a person stupid.
It was genuinely terrifying. Each time, his reason collapsed and his will broke down; he could neither control nor command himself. Qin Siyu considered himself fairly strong-willed, yet time after time he collapsed and broke down. If that didn’t count as “getting stupid,” then what did?
In their second year together, Aston graduated first.
Naturally, he chose to begin building his professional experience in San Francisco’s financial industry.
The economic downturn that began again in late 1933 continued through 1934 and 1935.
As in many marriages, after the initial sweetness came disagreements and doubts, with disappointment and conflict always close at hand.
In 1933, the index of industrial production rose from fifty-nine points in March to one hundred in July, then fell again. By November it was down to seventy-two points, and it hovered between seventy and eighty during 1934. Economic recovery lagged badly.
The Dust Bowl was also at its worst during 1934 and 1935. During the First World War, demand for wheat had greatly increased. With the advent of tractors, farmers on the American plains plowed up the native grasses to plant wheat, while ranchers grazed their cattle. Severe drought struck in 1934 and 1935, leaving the soil exposed. Windstorms sent enormous clouds of black earth spiraling through the sky. Dust storms carried everything away, and people from the central states poured into California.
People had become accustomed to the Depression, but unrest was beginning all the same.
The business and industrial sectors were extremely dissatisfied with New Deal policies such as inheritance taxes. Roosevelt also emphasized reform of the securities markets, introduced the Securities Act, and created the Securities and Exchange Commission. He even appointed a famous speculator to head the SEC on the grounds that he understood “speculation” better than anyone. For a time Roosevelt’s relations with the business world nearly ruptured.
Roosevelt and the Supreme Court were also locked in conflict. The Court unanimously struck down the National Industrial Recovery Act as unconstitutional, and in 1936 it struck down the Agricultural Adjustment Act and other legislation. Furious, Roosevelt separated the National Industrial Recovery Act into several bills and continued pushing them forward.
The United States recognized the Soviet Union, sparking new disputes between political factions.
Meanwhile, strikes had been spreading throughout the country since 1933.
The National Industrial Recovery Act had unexpectedly stimulated the development of labor unions. Strikes suddenly multiplied, with more than eighteen hundred erupting each year.
Violence was a constant companion to these strikes, and labor history was written in blood. States mobilized their National Guards as casualty lists grew appallingly long. During Minnesota’s “Bloody Friday” in 1934, for example, police fired on strikers, killing two and injuring sixty-seven. The governor subsequently declared martial law and mobilized the National Guard on a massive scale, though employers ultimately recognized the union. In Georgia, the governor even established detention camps to hold protesting workers.
Not until late 1935 did the economy begin to recover again, reaching an index of 120 by the end of 1936. Americans grew optimistic and began coming up with all sorts of ingenious inventions, such as nylon, radar, fluorescent lamps, and FM radio.
Yet even as things improved somewhat, unsettling forces continued to stir. The government ran a severe fiscal deficit, and the international situation remained turbulent.
In Europe, the Night of the Long Knives took place in 1934, followed by Hindenburg’s death and Hitler’s rise to the position of Führer, giving him effective control of Germany. In 1935 Germany defied the Treaty of Versailles and began a massive military buildup. In 1936 the Spanish Civil War erupted, and Germany moved into the Rhineland with troops and military operations. Fear spread across Europe.
Mussolini invaded Ethiopia while other countries proved powerless to stop him.
The United States, by contrast, dreaded war.
Americans generally believed they’d been tricked into entering the First World War, that it had all been “an enormous conspiracy by arms dealers and bankers.” The Depression had also left the country’s armed forces small and poorly equipped. Isolationism swept the nation. In 1935 some 150,000 university students even went on strike against American involvement in war, including students at Berkeley. Roosevelt himself wanted to be more active, but in August 1935, before Italy’s invasion, Congress hastily passed the Neutrality Act, followed by a new Neutrality Act in 1937.
Qin Siyu was deeply disappointed by these developments. In what sense was this genuine “neutrality”?
Aston performed exceptionally well after starting work. In only a year he was independently managing bond underwriting. Qin Siyu, meanwhile, was admitted to the University of California’s medical school in San Francisco and would begin studying there in the autumn of 1936.
Both schools belonged to the University of California. The university had been founded in 1868, with its main campus in Berkeley. Five years later it acquired the nearby Toland Medical College in San Francisco and established the university’s medical school.
From then on, he too would be living in San Francisco.
Looking back on those two years later, Qin Siyu felt that two days stood out most vividly in his memory.
The first was the anniversary of the day they’d met as children, when they’d encountered each other in a church for the first time.
Having already said farewell to the pastor, they didn’t return to the church. Instead, they went to Aston’s family estate in Hillsborough.
Aston naturally sat at the piano and played that piece for Qin Siyu. By now, beneath his fingers, the music was rich with feeling, his playing polished to perfection.
When the piece ended, Qin Siyu’s face was covered in tears.
Aston did not allow any of the servants to accompany them. Instead, he personally led Qin Siyu to the “confinement room,” the place where, as a child, he’d counted to 190,000 and fainted on the floor, then decided upon waking to run to the church and pray.
The room was completely dark. The moment Qin Siyu stepped inside, he felt as though he too might suffocate.
Somehow the irregular sound of dripping water reached his ears, piercing them like sharp needles.
Aston entered too.
It was strange. He’d thought for years that this room no longer affected him at all, yet as he brought Qin Siyu inside, he felt that only now was he truly, completely freeing himself from it.
“Kingsy,” Qin Siyu asked softly in the dark, “where were you sitting when you counted, and when you passed out?”
Aston took his hand and led him toward a corner. His voice echoed gently, one echo layered over another. “Here.”
“You were sitting here?”
“Mm.”
Qin Siyu asked Aston to sit once more in the same place. Then he knelt before him and kissed him reverently.
Their lips met and their tongues entwined.
Darkness and chaos surrounded them, but Qin Siyu could always find Aston’s lips precisely, as though an instinctive attraction guided him.
The punishment room had been designed to amplify echoes. Back then, Aston hadn’t dared cry, knowing his voice would be magnified many times
and would inevitably fill the whole room, terrifying for a small child. Now, however, the intimate sounds of their lips sucking and their tongues rubbing together were magnified and resonated. Original sounds and echoes overlapped in layer upon layer, until the room seemed filled on every side with their movements, licking, swallowing, and moaning.
Both undressed, and Aston held Qin Siyu by the backs of his knees and pressed him against the wall.
“These drops of water…” Aston said by his ear. “There actually is a pattern. Five seconds separate the first and second drops, then ten seconds between the second and third. After that, two seconds, three, seven, eight, then the cycle begins again.”
“You were so young,” Qin Siyu said, unable to understand. “Could you really count the seconds that precisely and predict when each drop would fall?”
“I could,” Aston said. “It’s possible. Listen… When the cycle comes around again, I’ll predict them for you.”
“Mm.”
Aston said, “One.”
At that same instant, Qin Siyu felt as though his soul were being filled, and the fingers of both hands gripping Aston’s shoulders twitched uncontrollably!
Ten seconds later, the water dripped again in the confinement room, and Aston’s voice caught it exactly. “Two.”
Two seconds later: “Three.”
Three seconds: “Four.”
Seven seconds: “Five.”
Eight seconds: “Six.”
Qin Siyu was trembling. “No…”
“Mechanically following external sounds is naturally rather dull,” Aston said. “Repetitive. Monotonous. So when I was young, I preferred to count on my own, to see how high I could get each time. Sean, would you like to experience it too?”
Qin Siyu didn’t understand, but he always agreed to the things Aston asked him to do. “All right.”
“Then be sure you count carefully,” Aston said.
Only now did Qin Siyu understand Aston’s wicked intention!
Even so, he obediently counted.
This was a punishment room, deliberately designed with an enormous echo.
Those sounds…
Far too… erotic.
Qin Siyu counted silently in his mind, while his back rubbed against the wall again and again.
At the end Aston held him close, rubbing against his ears and cheeks, and asked with extreme tenderness by his ear, “What was the final number this time? Seany, I trust you. You would never count incorrectly.”
Qin Siyu felt that he too was about to faint. Weakly he answered, “Three thousand nine hundred and sixty.”
It should have been a task even a kindergarten child could manage, yet this time Qin Siyu had to devote every bit of his strength, attention, and consciousness to counting. It was terribly difficult, especially near the end.
Each time, his thoughts had gradually drifted away, as though his soul were leaving his body. He knew nothing and understood nothing; the entire universe seemed reduced to one point deep within him.
But this time he forced himself to preserve the very last trace of reason and awareness so he could keep counting.
“Three thousand nine hundred and sixty,” Aston repeated, committing it to memory. “Good.”
Happily he said, “Good. From now on… from now on, 193,251 will no longer be the number that represents this place. From now on, 3,960 will replace it, cover it. Beginning today, 3,960 will be the greatest memory associated with this place, not 193,251 anymore.”
“Mm.” Qin Siyu nuzzled Aston’s ear. “It was 3,960. I counted very carefully. I really did, Kingsy.”
Aston kissed his neck.
It seemed that only today had the shadow this place cast over him truly vanished.
He’d always believed it had disappeared long ago. In fact, it hadn’t.
He had needed Sean.
The second important day was Aston’s birthday.
His first birthday since they had become a couple.
By then, everyone at the university knew that Kingsley Aston had a “girlfriend.”
Whenever anyone had confessed their feelings to him during the previous six months, he had sincerely explained that he was already in a relationship.
Nobody had ever seen his partner, but if Aston said he had one, then he certainly did. There was a mysterious lover somewhere.
Gradually rumors spread on campus that the woman was a princess from some European country, hence the need for secrecy. As the tale passed from person to person, the princess became noble, elegant, and exceptionally beautiful; she and Aston were a perfect golden couple.
Qin Siyu paid no attention to the rumors. He concentrated on working and saving money to buy Aston a gift.
He chose a tie clip.
It had to be worthy of Aston, so he couldn’t take the choice lightly. After searching for a long time, he found one he wanted desperately. Unfortunately, it cost sixty dollars.
So Qin Siyu took on another job six months in advance. Classes, homework, experiments, papers, volunteering, typing for a securities firm, typing for an elderly lawyer, applying to medical school… Then he added a job at a gas station and had to find time to be in love as well. He wore himself out.
Fortunately, he had his Snail Maiden.
Qin Siyu had always considered himself energetic, but during those six months he often felt exhausted. At first he’d been so exhilarated that thinking of Aston seemed to eliminate any need for rest, as though his brain had an engine running inside it. Eventually, though, his body could take no more. By November he felt sleepy all the time, every single day. Wherever he was and whatever he was doing, he could fall asleep as soon as he closed his eyes. Fortunately winter break arrived just then.
The gas station paid better than cutting asparagus. Qin Siyu put away a dollar and twenty cents each week and worked extra days throughout the month of winter break. Finally, just before Aston’s birthday, he carried his saved coins into a department store, approached an elegant counter, pointed to the display, and said to the salesperson, “Excuse me. I’d like this one.”
He was clearly poor, and the salesperson looked surprised.
Noticing how carefully he handled everything, she asked, “Is it a gift for someone?”
Qin Siyu didn’t dare reveal that he was gay, so he merely said, “Yes. He changed the course of my entire life. I want to thank him.”
Aston’s birthday was February ninth.
Unfortunately he had to travel on business that day, so Qin Siyu took the train to meet him.
He brought out the gift in a restaurant. The instant Aston opened the box, both of his blue irises seemed to darken, turning a deep midnight blue.
He held the tie clip between his fingers. “This…”
He recognized the brand. For him it was inexpensive, but for Qin Siyu it was undoubtedly a luxury.
“I…” Qin Siyu’s cheeks reddened. “Because it was for you, I went into a big department store too! All by myself!”
“Seany…”
“Don’t worry,” Qin Siyu added. “I’ve been preparing for half a year. I only worked a tiny bit more each week, about four hours or so.”
Aston only lowered his gaze to the tie clip.
His present.
He recalled how, when he’d first met Qin Siyu, he’d repeatedly wondered what it would feel like to be treasured by someone who gave everything they had.
His heart swelled and ached.
Qin Siyu had hardly any money left, but on Aston’s birthday he didn’t want to spend Aston’s money either. A few days beforehand he’d booked a relatively cheap little hotel that seemed decent but was actually a dreadful bargain.
The room was tiny, shabby, and old. Fortunately, it was clean.
Lying on the bed, Qin Siyu whispered, “I’m sorry…”
Aston didn’t answer. He took the tie clip off his chest, fastened it gently in Qin Siyu’s black hair, and kissed him.
Aston slipped his index finger into Qin Siyu’s mouth and moved it about. When Qin Siyu understood the rhythm, Aston replaced the finger with his tongue.
They made love all night.
The hotel walls were too thin to block the sounds. If they were discovered, everything would be ruined. Aston put a knuckle between Qin Siyu’s teeth so he could bite down on his hand. Qin Siyu didn’t want to bite, but the sensations overwhelmed him and his body stopped obeying his mind. First he bit Aston’s finger hard enough to draw blood and tasted it.
Aston wasn’t angry. He even paused to ask, “Seany, may I have these tooth marks tattooed on my hand?”
“No.” Qin Siyu, eyes full of tears, extended his tongue and licked the wound. “Kingsy, I never want to hurt you. If you did that, I’d feel guilty every time I saw it.”
And then, beyond his control, Qin Siyu bit down harder than ever.
Strangely enough, both of them sometimes wanted to control and sometimes wanted to be controlled. Each wanted to possess the other and to belong to the other in turn. Neither felt humiliated by surrendering control. Qin Siyu loved being cared for by this man and even loved being guided and controlled by him, trusting him wholeheartedly and giving himself over to him.
What he loved most were Aston’s lowered blue eyes in moments of passion, when the entire ocean within them seemed to lose its focus.
As though Aston would love him forever, until the day all the oceans in the world disappeared.
The second time, they took their time.
They often did things that way.
They held each other, and after a while Aston would stop, restraining himself and stopping Qin Siyu too. Then they would exchange a slow, delicate kiss.
Afterward their desire for one another built up again and again, accumulating layer upon layer.
People always claimed homosexuals were slaves to their desires. For them, however, the important thing had never been desire, but love. They constantly reminded each other of that truth.
In the end, the sheets were wrinkled once more.
“Seany.” Afterward Aston held Qin Siyu with his face buried against his shoulder and neck. “Don’t buy me things like this again. For me… one is already more than enough.”
Qin Siyu hugged him back. “All right.”
They didn’t fall asleep until dawn was beginning to brighten the sky.
The hotel walls really were terribly thin. It seemed that only two or three hours later, Qin Siyu was woken by voices next door.
Opening his eyes, he saw that Aston, held in his arms, was frowning slightly too.
At the sight, sadness suddenly washed over Qin Siyu.
He still remembered the first few times he’d met Aston, back in 1932, when the man had seemed so far above him.
Aston had dressed magnificently and carried himself like nobility. But now… he was spending his birthday, his first birthday since starting work, in a dilapidated old hotel, making love all night with a man.
The man he’d been then had “fallen” so far, all because of Qin Siyu.
Just as Qin Siyu was growing upset, Aston opened his eyes.
The moment he saw Qin Siyu, Aston smiled, hugged him, nuzzled his head against both shoulders and collarbones, and said sweetly, “Seany, I feel so happy.”
In an instant, Qin Siyu’s eyes grew faintly wet again.
…
From that birthday onward, Aston wore the tie clip Qin Siyu had given him every single day. He never changed it, regardless of the color or style of his suit, shirt, or tie. When he got home each evening he placed it carefully in a velvet box.
There were people who thought Aston’s tie clip looked inexpensive, “unworthy” of him, or unsuited to certain tie colors. Hoping to flatter him, they would give him another. Without exception, Aston returned every one unopened. “I don’t need a new tie clip,” he said.
Eventually everyone understood: he liked only that one tie clip.
That one and no other.