With an earpiece in, Chu Hao Yu crawled forward on his stomach. Before long, he lowered his head and whispered, “Hello, hello. You can hear me, right? This is the incredibly, unbelievably handsome Brother Hao Yu speaking. We are now one hundred meters from the target.”
“I hear you. These earpieces are full of static. Zhang Luo, next time stop buying cheap junk online,” Ying Xiu Jie replied as he followed close behind in camouflage. Behind Ying Xiu Jie came Ke Bu and Gong Zhu. Ke Bu simply could not understand why they needed earpieces when they were practically crawling on top of one another. And wouldn’t wearing camouflage around campus make them even more conspicuous?!
“Can’t help it. We’re short on funds.”
“Has anyone seen Zhi Li?”
“No sign of him. We’re not waiting anymore. A great mission still awaits us. Comrades, for the revolution, for New China, for ourselves, for the dignity of men—charge! Fear nothing!” Chu Hao Yu launched into the most impassioned speech imaginable.
Ke Bu ground his teeth. “Do we really need to start crawling from this far away?”
“Stay concealed. Don’t let the enemy spot you. Zhang Luo, what is the enemy doing on the surveillance feed?”
“She’s sitting by the window knitting. Advance through the blind spot beneath the window.”
“Understood.”
“Ow, my elbows are going to get scraped raw,” Gong Zhu complained, puffing out his cheeks with his delicate skin.
Ke Bu looked away for barely a moment, and Ying Xiu Jie had somehow already crawled all the way to the window of the little white building at the foot of the dormitory. Wasn’t he crawling a little too fast? Ying Xiu Jie pressed a finger to his lips, signaling for silence, then gestured for everyone to follow. The four of them shuffled forward like a pack of zombies, barely daring to breathe as they passed under the window. People walking nearby stared at them strangely, while Ke Bu did everything possible to keep his face hidden.
“Hurry, she’s getting up.”
Ying Xiu Jie rolled around the corner. Chu Hao Yu rolled around the corner. Ke Bu rolled around the corner. Gong Zhu rolled around the corner. All four panted for breath. Ying Xiu Jie cautiously poked his head out and glanced toward the little white building. “She shouldn’t be able to see us from here.”
Chu Hao Yu was so overwhelmed that he was nearly moved to tears. “Comrades, I never imagined victory could feel this wonderful. We did it. We finally broke through layer after layer of the enemy’s defenses and made it inside. At this moment, words cannot express what I feel.” Whatever had Chu Hao Yu this emotional was obviously not going to be wholesome. He rose to his feet and spread his arms wide. “The girls’ dormitory! I finally made it inside!”
Yes, the boys’ group challenge this time was to infiltrate the girls’ dormitory, and the terrifying “enemy” they had spent all that effort avoiding was merely the dorm supervisor. Gong Zhu dusted off his clothes. “Which room is You Yan’s?”
“What’s the hurry? We finally got in here. Obviously we should visit every room.” Chu Hao Yu gave a sleazy grin and flexed his fingers. “There are good things inside.”
Ying Xiu Jie tilted his head. “What good things?”
“Underwear, obviously.”
“Why don’t you just ask them to give you some?” Ying Xiu Jie was forever slow when it came to things like this. In his eyes, men and women did not seem fundamentally different; women merely wore two extra pieces of cloth.
“Xiu Jie, stop wasting your breath on that idiot.” Ke Bu walked ahead. “Try to avoid the girls. If someone reports us, we’re finished.”
“Okay.” Gong Zhu nodded.
Ke Bu glanced back at him. “You don’t need to hide. At worst, they’ll mistake you for a T—a butch lesbian.”
“Ke Bu, what the hell is that supposed to mean?!”
The four of them spent ages searching before they finally found Su You Yan’s dorm room. Exhausted, they pushed open the door, and Ke Bu’s eyes immediately widened. Zhi Li was sitting at the desk reading, a carton of milk still in his hand, while Su You Yan and Zhou Xin He each went about their own business beside him. What was this bizarre imperial-harem tableau supposed to be?
“Zhi Li!! When did you get in here?!”
Zhi Li thought for a moment. “Four hours ago.”
Only then did Ke Bu notice the badge pinned to Zhi Li’s chest. It looked strangely familiar. He rushed over and read the words printed across it:
Student Council President: Yan Feng
“Yan Feng, since when did you grow Zhi Li’s face?! You can actually get away with this?! Where did you get that badge?”
“I borrowed it from Yan Feng.”
Ke Bu stared at him suspiciously. “Since when are you two close enough for him to lend you that? He didn’t say a single word? I don’t believe you.”
“He really didn’t say anything. When I went to find him, he was taking a shower, so I took his clothes and badge while I was there.”
Zhi Li delivered the confession with perfect calm.
“That’s called stealing!!!”
“Is there a difference?”
Ke Bu clutched his hair and screamed internally: Lan Yin, as his mother, could you please teach him something useful for once?! In the end, he realized that getting angry over things like this was completely pointless. He folded his arms and bounced one foot. “The boys have finished our challenge. What about the girls?”
Su You Yan gave a cold laugh and tossed the book in her hand backward, striking Chu Hao Yu, who was currently stealing underwear from the balcony.
At that moment, the door swung open. Standing there was a tall, powerfully built woman whose face had gone bright red with fury. “How did you boys get in here? What year are you in? What class? Take me to your class adviser! This is outrageous!”
“W-We…”
Zhi Li rose to his feet and looked sternly at the group. “If I hadn’t caught you while inspecting the dormitory, what exactly were you planning to do in here?” He even paused to take a sip of milk.
He had washed his hands of them with astonishing speed.
“I’ll take them to the student council,” Zhi Li said, then gave the dorm supervisor a wink with his right eye.
The woman immediately lit up. “Exactly! Give every one of them a demerit. Otherwise, who knows what kind of chaos they’ll cause next time?”
Zhi Li was openly charming a middle-aged woman right in front of him, yet Ke Bu had no choice but to swallow his anger. He glared at Zhi Li with knitted brows, only for Zhi Li to tap him lightly on the head with his book. “This student here sneaks shamelessly into the girls’ dormitory and still has the nerve to look defiant. Fix that expression and show some humility.”
“Tsk, tsk. Students these days. Just look at him—you can tell at a glance he’s no good,” the dorm supervisor agreed.
“………………….”
Zhang Luo handed two sealed bags to Su You Yan and Zhou Xin He. A thick tube ran out from each one. He explained, “They work a bit like IV bags. Press here and the liquid comes out, and you can control how strong the stream is. There’s also a strap, so you can fasten the bag directly around your waist. With an autumn jacket covering it, nobody will notice.”
Su You Yan shook the bag. “What did you put inside?”
“Don’t worry. How could I possibly cut corners on something for Sister You Yan? Chu Hao Yu and Ying Xiu Jie told me to put urine in it, but how could I betray Sister You Yan like that? It’s tea.”
The bell rang sharply for the end of class, and boys began pouring out of the classrooms toward the restroom. Ke Bu and the others tried their best to look completely normal as they blended into the crowd. The instant they reached the doorway, however, every one of them stopped dead.
Two girls were standing at the urinal trough.
Both wore jeans and had their backs to the entrance. The petite figure on one side awkwardly moved her right hand somewhere in front of herself while a thin yellow stream came out in weak, intermittent spurts. Beside her stood another girl with her hair tied back and snow-white skin. In front of her, a much stronger stream came rushing down. When it stopped, she even shook her right hand, gave a little hop, and zipped up her jeans. The imitation was so perfect it was almost uncanny. Then she turned around expressionlessly and stared at the crowd of boys who had already gone completely slack-jawed.
“Hurry up,” Su You Yan told Zhou Xin He.
“B-But…”
Su You Yan walked over to Zhou Xin He. From where the boys stood at the doorway, they could not see what was actually happening in front of the girls; all they saw was Su You Yan reaching a hand toward Zhou Xin He’s crotch. The weak, stuttering stream suddenly became much stronger, splashing loudly into the trough. Zhou Xin He’s face turned crimson as she hurriedly zipped her jeans and turned around.
The boys no longer knew how to describe what they had just witnessed. They had come to use the restroom only to discover two women standing at the urinals, apparently pulling something out and peeing like men.
Zhou Xin He covered her face, looking as though she was about to cry. “I have no face left to live with.”
She shoved her way through the boys and fled.
Ke Bu desperately wanted to laugh, but holding it back made his stomach ache. Su You Yan gave him one calm glance, then walked straight through the stunned crowd and out of the restroom as though nothing unusual had happened.
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