Futile Devices Scans

Ever since that day, Dora came almost every day. Ke Bu found himself barely able to get close to Zhi Li. Only then did he truly realize that Zhi Li did not belong to him alone. The possessiveness rising within him filled him with inexplicable panic. Wasn’t he becoming just like Dora? In the end, everyone was the same. No one could resist the desire to completely possess the person they loved. He wanted to shake off those thoughts. He didn’t want to make things difficult for Zhi Li. Dora’s return was only temporary—was he really going to begrudge her even this little bit of time? Even though he kept trying to comfort himself that way, Ke Bu could not suppress the unease in his heart. Dora had not crossed any obvious lines, but he did not believe she had truly changed.

After evening self-study ended, everyone left the classroom. Su You Yan usually stayed late reading. Gradually the classroom grew quiet, until only the sound of turning pages remained.

“What book are you reading?” A sudden voice made Su You Yan look up. When had she appeared? She had not sensed Dora’s presence at all. Like a ghost, Dora stood there with an innocent smile. Even someone as perceptive as Su You Yan could only occasionally catch faint hints of the danger beneath it. Closing her book, Su You Yan asked, “What do you want with me?”

“I was just wondering what exactly it is that you like about Brother Zhi Li. Forgive me for being nosy, but as his little sister, I want to help keep an eye on him.”

“That doesn’t seem to be any of your business,” Su You Yan replied coldly.

Dora did not get angry. Sitting on top of the desk in front of Su You Yan, she swung her legs back and forth. “That’s true. Still, I really don’t understand what Brother Zhi Li sees in you. That scar on your face is really ugly, you know. You Yan, you’re even uglier than I imagined.” Tilting her head, Dora smiled with narrowed eyes. She was deliberately digging at Su You Yan’s wounds. Unmoved, Su You Yan stood up. “Do you really think I’m that easy to provoke?”

“I’m not trying to provoke you. I’m simply stating a fact. Don’t want to talk about it? How ugly must the past behind that scar be? Did you think that hiding behind Brother Zhi Li would make everything go away? That scar is a mark. You can’t escape it. The traces of your past will follow you for the rest of your life. How pitiful. I think Brother Zhi Li probably just pities you too. After all, who would actually want a woman like you? How pitiful, You Yan. So very pitiful.” Dora’s words seemed almost magical in the way they stirred up tension.

“Are you talking about yourself? Is this really all you’ve got? Do you think doing things like this will make Zhi Li stay? Has it worked? How ridiculous.” One rhetorical question followed another. Dora only laughed harder. Leaning back slightly before sitting upright again, she suddenly raised her hand and slapped Su You Yan across the face. “I don’t recall ever giving an ugly freak like you permission to lecture me.”

Touching her cheek, Su You Yan remained expressionless. Looking directly at Dora’s smiling face, she swung her hand and slapped her back. “That’s for returning the favor.” The sharp sound echoed through the empty classroom. Why now? Of all times, why now? Just as Ke Bu and Zhi Li arrived outside the classroom, they witnessed Su You Yan striking Dora, who appeared to be chatting cheerfully and smiling. Why now, of all times? Panic surged through Ke Bu as he rushed forward and stood in front of Su You Yan. “You Yan, are you alright? It’s all because of me. It’s all because of me.” Guilt spread through his mind. This unbearable feeling. Did Zhi Li feel the same way toward Dora? Or perhaps even more strongly? Watching someone he regarded as a younger sister attempt suicide because of him—Zhi Li had carried that burden all this time. His heart ached for him. The last thing he wanted was for Zhi Li to become entangled in this situation. Yet he had been dragged into it anyway.

“Ke Bu, you’re so strange. I’m the one who got hit, aren’t I? Yet you’re protecting her. Do you like her? The two of you are bullying me together even though I’m the outsider here. Brother Zhi Li, Dora was very well-behaved this time. I didn’t hit anyone. I only wanted to chat with You Yan, but she slapped me. Is it because I came and interrupted your time together?” Dora’s voice was pitiful and innocent.

Ke Bu looked at Zhi Li. Everyone looked at Zhi Li. What expression could he possibly use to face all this? There was no expression visible on his face, no clue in his eyes. Su You Yan stared at her own hand. Her lips parted slightly, but in the end she said nothing. It was the same feeling Ke Bu carried—something impossible to explain, impossible to use as justification for speaking badly about Dora in front of Zhi Li. Doing so would only force Zhi Li into an impossible position.

Zhi Li glanced once at Su You Yan before turning to Dora. “I’ll walk you home.”

“Okay.” Dora obediently jumped down from the desk.

As she reached the doorway, Dora turned back and smiled. A chill ran down Ke Bu’s spine.

“You Yan, are you alright?”

“What a mistake,” Su You Yan said quietly. “I actually hit her. I actually hit Dora right in front of Zhi Li. He’ll hate me now, won’t he?” It was the first time Ke Bu had ever seen such an expression on Su You Yan’s face. A sad expression. Zhi Li was her anchor, her image of something beautiful. She depended on him to keep going. And now she had made things difficult for the very person she had always protected. As a form of comfort, Ke Bu pushed her book back toward her. “So you really are a girl after all. Even you have your vulnerable moments. Stop overthinking it. There’s no way he could hate you.”

After leaving Su You Yan behind, Ke Bu ran after Dora. Dora lived in the small town near the school. He needed to make things clear. He needed to explain things to Dora. You Yan had protected him. She never should have had to. It was so humiliating. He had known all along that Dora was dangerous.

By the time he reached the school gate, Zhi Li was already walking back toward him. One stood at the top of the steps and the other at the bottom. Ke Bu wanted to say something, but the words about Dora would not come out. What else could he say? Step by step, he descended the stairs. Zhi Li stood there waiting. What was he thinking? Ke Bu had no idea. Even after knowing him for so many years, he still could not see through the unfathomable depths of Zhi Li’s heart. Reaching the final step, an indescribable emotion clogged his throat.

“I never wanted things to become like this. I never wanted to make things difficult for you. I really wanted to get along with Dora. Please don’t blame You Yan.”

Zhi Li pulled Ke Bu into his arms. At just the right height, Ke Bu’s chin came to rest against Zhi Li’s shoulder. “Stop talking, Ke Bu. Stop talking.” The words were simple, but they seeped straight into Ke Bu’s emotions. He hugged Zhi Li tightly. At last, held in Zhi Li’s embrace, Ke Bu calmed down. Lifting his head, he said, “You Yan is still in the classroom.”

“Mhm. Go back to the dormitory and behave.”

“I know.” After separating from Zhi Li, the warmth lingering in his chest remained, holding on against the cold air. Zhi Li arrived at the classroom. Su You Yan looked up. “Sorry.” Apart from apologizing, she could think of nothing else to say. Zhi Li placed a hand on her head and softly said, “You’ve been wronged.” Su You Yan stared at him in surprise. Then Zhi Li openly teased, “Are you crying?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. Who would cry over a brat like you?”

Ke Bu lied. He had lied to Zhi Li. He had not gone back to the dormitory. He wanted to find Dora. Before he could go looking for her, however, Dora returned on her own, strolling along lightly with her hands clasped behind her back. “Isn’t this Ke Bu? What are you doing here?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing.”

Dora shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep, so I came back. Judging by the look on your face, you have something you want to say to me.”

“That’s enough, Dora. Isn’t it enough already? The person who’s together with Zhi Li isn’t You Yan—it’s me. Stop bothering her. You can do whatever you want to me.” Dora did not seem surprised by what Ke Bu said. “I know. Did you really think I was stupid enough not to tell the difference?”

“You know? Then why did you go after You Yan?”

“Why? Because she’s too close to Brother Zhi Li. It doesn’t matter what kind of feelings she has. It’s not allowed. No one is allowed. Especially that ugly freak.”

“Don’t talk about You Yan like that.”

“The first time I saw you and Brother Zhi Li together, I already knew you liked him. How shameless. You’re a man, yet you still dare to get involved in romantic nonsense. It’s disgusting. I’m going to save Brother Zhi Li from something so disgusting. Back when I was in high school, I saw the way Brother Zhi Li looked at you from the rooftop while I was standing on the pedestrian overpass. That indulgent look in his eyes. From that moment on, I swore it. Only you, Ke Bu. Only you. I’m going to completely destroy you.” That look had returned. So full of hatred. Ke Bu’s stomach cramped involuntarily. It was like a nightmare. She meant it. She would use every possible means to destroy him.

“Then what are you going to do? Commit suicide again?”

“Suicide?” Dora let out a cold laugh through her nose. “Did you really think a wound that shallow could kill me? Or did you think I ever intended to die?” Once again, Dora leaned close to Ke Bu’s ear. Her icy tone stabbed painfully into his eardrum. “I did it on purpose.”

Ke Bu’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Why? Just so Zhi Li wouldn’t be able to scold you anymore?”

“How could I possibly do something like that for such a shallow reason? I deliberately said those things. I deliberately went abroad for treatment. I wanted him to understand that if I became suicidal, if I turned out that way, it was all his responsibility. All his fault. Me? I want Brother Zhi Li to carry guilt toward me for the rest of his life. I want him to be unable to forget me for the rest of his life. Unable to erase me.” Dora bared her teeth in a grin, exposing her canine teeth. Wearing that adorable face, she spoke such horrifying words. Ke Bu took a step back. Terrifying. This woman was terrifying. Even as a man, he was afraid of Dora. Embarrassing as it was, he could only admit it. He was afraid of her. Afraid of her trademark way of lightly skipping around with her hands behind her back. Afraid of her eyes. Afraid of her smile. Even afraid of the canine teeth she revealed, as though she were always ready to tear apart her prey. The reason she had confessed everything so openly was because she had already seen through his weakness. He could not say it. He could not say it to Zhi Li. How could he tell Zhi Li that his adorable little sister had done all these things, that she was a complete monster? Words like that would only sound as though he were trying to drive a wedge between them. How could he possibly say them? It would only make Zhi Li suffer. Was he supposed to make a choice? Between himself and a younger sister whom Zhi Li regarded as family and toward whom he carried deep guilt? Something so cruel—no!

The pain he could not voice pressed against his chest until it hurt.

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