“These are the clothes you wore on the day you were sentenced.”
“Huh?”
The sound had barely left Mu Xueshi’s mouth before he realized he had broken his own rule. He immediately shut his mouth again and pretended not to care.
Seeing Mu Xueshi’s puffed-up expression, the Third Prince found it difficult not to laugh. Everything Mu Xueshi did revealed exactly what he was thinking; he was simple to read, which made his emotions easy for the prince to steer.
“If Young Master Xue is not interested, then I need not say any more.”
Mu Xueshi snorted. This time, he was determined to teach the Third Prince a lesson. He stubbornly kept his back turned for a while, but before long his curiosity won out and his head slowly shifted as he tried to sneak a glance behind him.
Unfortunately, that one glance brought his eyes directly into contact with the Third Prince’s. The prince’s gaze was deep and unfathomable; Mu Xueshi’s was clear and bright. The moment their eyes met, Mu Xueshi surrendered first. He snorted and darted aside, grumbling, “Don’t try to bewitch me. My self-control is very strong.”
The Third Prince chuckled and handed him something. Mu Xueshi looked closely and realized it was the same set of clothes the prince had just been examining.
“Put them on,” the Third Prince ordered.
Mu Xueshi refused and turned his head away, ignoring him.
The Third Prince was about to lose his temper, but the sight of Mu Xueshi’s handsome face made his anger disappear. Rather than waste words, he acted directly, firmly removing Mu Xueshi’s current clothes and putting the old garments on him. Although they had gone more than a month without care, a faint fragrance still clung to them.
Even then, Mu Xueshi said nothing and let the Third Prince handle him as he pleased. No matter how forceful the prince’s movements became, Mu Xueshi clenched his teeth and refused to utter an unnecessary word.
The stubbornness he was barely holding onto shattered at the Third Prince’s next words.
“This is the real you,” the Third Prince said calmly.
Now even if Mu Xueshi wanted to speak, he did not know what to say. He had never imagined that the only thing the Third Prince would bring back from the Grand Tutor’s residence was this: something capable of stirring old memories and recreating the former Mu Xueshi before his eyes. The prince did not like the person Mu Xueshi had become now. If he did not carry Mu Xueshi’s identity, the Third Prince would never have drawn close to him.
In the end, everything came back to the same point: all these favors had come only because he was Mu Xueshi. He regarded the Third Prince as the most important person in his world besides Mother Chen, yet that person did not even know who he truly was.
The Third Prince also noticed that once Mu Xueshi put on those clothes, even his entire bearing changed. His expression became increasingly stiff and distant, the indifference in his eyes growing stronger. For some reason, seeing him like this filled the Third Prince with a long-forgotten fear, like the childhood nightmare in which Lin Yue was taken away before his eyes.
All the laughter, teasing, and playfulness from earlier vanished completely with a simple change of clothes.
They slept on the same pillow that night, but Mu Xueshi lay awake with his eyes wide open. Everything from the day and evening replayed again and again in his mind: the warmth of riding together, the embarrassment in the bath, the loneliness beside the table. Every scene seemed dazzling and unreal, like a dream.
Mu Xueshi almost wished it really were only a dream. He would wake in his own home, hair a mess, rushing off to school with the same ugly face he had always had. Or perhaps he had already died beside that lake where he lost his way, and all of this was nothing more than his imagination.
He found himself longing for the carefree days he used to have. People might mock him, but he would forget it a moment later and laugh without restraint. Now a single careless sentence could smash his beautiful dream to pieces. He felt more exhausted than ever before and wanted to shout inside his heart, I want to go back to being carefree! Yet the only answer was a cold, mocking echo: You’re only dreaming…
Mu Xueshi took a deep breath and tried to shift a little farther away from the Third Prince. Suddenly his chest tightened as the prince’s strong arm pulled him back, pressing him firmly against his chest. Mu Xueshi closed his eyes and quietly savored that borrowed warmth.